Good news for nerds, outcasts, homos and freaks: those dudes winning on your school's football team are going to bomb out of life: the more winning there is, the more their grades go down. You should totally cite them this survey while they're beating you up.

Who ever would have thought that the Democratic-majority Congress would be a nest of snaky, wussy morons? For the first time in ever, a White House is actually about to fix our idiot healthcare system-except the majority party is scared it'll offend the Republicans. Meanwhile, they are dicking about with various environmental bills, ensuring that their various constituents, whether they be farmers or oil companies, get exactly what they want. Which means, in the end, nothing. But at least the American Petroleum Institute will be happy! Ugh they are all making me into a Libertarian, how unfortunate.