Posts Tagged: LOLs
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Introducing… Shirterate

People often ask us what's next for our company. We've spent a lot of time surveying the Internet landscape, and, while the land rush into the content arena has been gratifying to watch for those of us who've worked in the "space" since long before there was a venture capital invasion, we really feel that the future of the Internet is in serving individuals. One by one. Artisanally. Particularly high net worth individuals. So we'd like to invite you to visit our new project, Shirterate.

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The Lone Protester At The Pulitzer Announcement

Cliff Kincaid, President of America's Survival Inc., outside the Columbia School of Journalism following the announcement of the 2014 Pulitzer Prize winners. Kincaid peppered outgoing Pulitzer administrator Sig Gissler during the question period over the awarding of The Guardian and The Washington Post in the Public Service category, for their revelation of widespread secret surveillance by the National Security Agency involving leaked documents by former NSA contractor Edward Snowden. "It was really sad. It was a disgraceful day for journalism," said Kincaid.

Pulitzer Prize Administrator Sig Gissler answering questions following the announcement of the 2014 winners. Concluding a barrage of questions regarding the awarding of The Guardian and [...]

1

How To Write The Perfect Listicle

People drop things on the Internet and run all the time. So we have to ask. In this edition, Daily Dot assigning editor Cooper Fleishman tells us more about his childhood secret agent persona and affinity for creating listicles even at a young age.

Here are my secret-agent credentials, along with my very first listicle. pic.twitter.com/dd38jge0eB

— Cooper Fleishman (@_Cooper) March 23, 2014

Cooper! So what happened here?

Glad you asked. You’re looking at the credentials of Agent 3.3 Cubed, a.k.a. Tykk (pronounced “Tyke”), who by day was a rat-tailed third-grader named Cooper Fleishman, age 8.

My parents are currently packing up [...]

2

The "Light Thinking Followed By Typing" Industry Strikes Again

Flappy Bird Think Pieces Dot Tumblr Dot Com has helpfully aggregated segregated all the long pieces of writing about the short-lived app sensation Flappy Bird, so that they will not appear anywhere else on the Internet and you won't be disturbed by them. LOOK ONLY IF YOU DARE. An emotional winter is coming. No but seriously, the trick is picking the good one!

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Lone Man Beats Brands At Grammys Twitter

The race was on for viral heat during the Grammys last night. The viral marketers were very, very busy! And yet one man, with fewer than a thousand followers of his own, outdid them all. Perhaps there is some hope for America and/or the Internet.

.@pharrellhat how embarrasing we're wearing the same thing. #twinsies #mountie #MusicToYourNose pic.twitter.com/x2id16ndNR

— Gain Laundry (@Gain) January 27, 2014

Be gone satan pic.twitter.com/edrbyywLxL

— MALEEZUS (@_Shikor_) January 27, 2014

No we don't know who the 8000+ people who'd retweet a LAUNDRY DETERGENT are either, but bless this Maleezus fellow anyway.

4

Headline Contains Words

"Facebook’s New Branch Hire Tweets About His Medium Posts" is definitely the headline of the day, if not the year. Don't have any idea what it means? Then you will be left behind in a meaningless netherworld of oldness and sadness. Congratulations to Peter Kafka of <re/code> for this one. What's that strange series of letters and symbols, you ask? You poor thing, we should just put you down. How are you going to survive when you have to drive your lightcycle around the grid in a deathrace for survival? (via)

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One Shocking Graph That Explains Why You Don't Need To Worry About "Peak Troll"

Yes, getting to Peak Troll—the state in which everything on the Internet is the worst it possibly could be—is a concern. But let's look at the facts—the facts of climate change! When the future of the Internet is graphed against sea level projections, it all works out okay. Most of us will likely die before Peak Troll completely ruins everything forever. Knock wood—and stay at sea level. Better to go out with the coasts than survive and live through what the Internet will be like in 100 years.

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New Subway Line to Connect Brooklyn and Some Other Borough

Ever since the streetcar system that connected Brooklyn and Queens was effectively dismantled by the automobile industry, there has been virtually no way to travel between the two boroughs without a car, except by bike, boat, bus, foot or fowl. But today, the Metropolitan Transit Authority has announced the opening of a new subway line that will run essentially north-south, exclusively serving the two rapidly growing outer boroughs.

Called the G line, it will run between Church Avenue in Brooklyn and Court Square in Queens. While the trains only features four cars, they will run every eight minutes between 3 p.m. and 9 p.m. on weekdays. P.A. [...]

3

Amazing Weekend For The Gays

Scissor Sister Jake Shears, Ed Droste (Mr. Grizzly Bear) and Chris Moukarbel (director of the Chris Crocker documentary) casually relaxed poolside while gay marriage became legal in the UK.

If anyone's got anything better than this today, please speak now (via @zoesqwilliams & @darren_scott) pic.twitter.com/wPOOPARcoz

— Bob Granleese (@bobgranleese) March 30, 2014

What an incredible world. And how was your weekend?

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You Are What You Tweet

Are you what you tweet? Let's say yes. Using Tweetails, we obtained the data of most-used words for different Twitter accounts. Some groupings began to suggest themselves. Certainly, some unflattering self-portraits emerged.

Sir Mix-A-Lot

Justin Bieber

Tina Brown

Nick Denton

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A Video Tribute To Flappy Bird, 2013-2014

You were too flappy to live.

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Why Do So Many Romcoms Use Songs By The Cure?

Have you ever wondered why The Cure is used to soundtrack so many romantic comedies? Have you ever stopped to think about what that implies, that this British deep-goth turned pop-rock band hits a particular sweet spot, like the meet-cute, for this dying movie genre? A few months ago, I went to go see About Time, a middling romcom by the same writer and director of Love Actually, and when I heard "Friday I’m in Love," something in me snapped.

I couldn’t enjoy the montage. It was Rachel McAdams and a surprisingly alluring ginger man (Domhnall Gleeson) running around, changing from chic outfit to chic outfit, falling [...]

2

Man Owned

“I consider Roger Ailes to be one of the most fascinating, consequential figures in contemporary American life. I wrote this book to shed light on the full scope of his talents and power, which have found their fullest expression at Fox News.” Ya burnt.

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Dante Trolled

Commuting from Gracie Mansion is hard—just ask Bloomberg, he used to have to drive 22 blocks to the subway to catch the express! Poor Bloomberg.

Now Dante de Blasio faces the challenge of maybe having to get from Gracie Mansion to his high school on the downtown edge of Fort Greene. Except of course his fellow students are like "LOL I take three buses and two trains." :/

Alex Gaviria, 14, a freshman at Brooklyn Tech who commutes over an hour from Queens on the No. 7 and G trains, said the appeal of Dante’s possible new home should trump any travel concerns. “Come on, it’s the [...]

3

The Artisanal Troll

A society should really only be judged on the quality of its trolling. Some trolls are obvious, some are subtle, some are dumb. (Some are all three.) But some trollery approaches pure critique, is made of the finest digital intervention, and only performed for a limited audience. It's artisanal trolling! Hand-roll troll! (Is it really trolling if you're not chasing a huge audience? Hmm!) Here's Greg Allen going in on Twitter with the Cambridge University's Digital Library's… let's say "ironically orientalist" take on a very beautiful 16th century Islamic manuscript version of Zakariya Qazvini's cosmography.

Some trolling is successful even!

@gregorg @vhfscott brilliant! Now I [...]

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The One School You Can Send Your Daughter To Make Her "Lean Into" A Rich And Famous Man

Among the girls who have attended Marlborough, the first major independent school to go co-ed, starting with its 1968 sixth form—there is a more fascinating trend. For here, the brightest and best are listed remarkably often next to the words 'wife of.' Most famous, of course, is the Duchess of Cambridge, 'wife of' our future king. But see also, Samantha Cameron, 'wife of' the Prime Minister. Frances Osborne, 'wife of' the Chancellor. Sally Bercow, 'wife of' the Speaker. Diana Fox, 'wife of' the Governor of the Bank of England…. Its reach of influence stretches across the internet, fashion, the BBC and Hollywood, through old girls Amanda Rosenberg (dating Google [...]

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Chef Burnt

.@gzchef @Storyful I was official photog for Reagan too. He also wore casual clothes on weekends in the Oval Office. pic.twitter.com/tz61N7jkNs

— petesouza (@petesouza) March 3, 2014

In which long-time White House photographer Pete Souza corrects idiot Reagan-worshipping celebrity chef Geoffrey Zakarian on the issue of Barack Obama wearing weekend clothes. Now you know where not to eat.

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Dogecoin Is Real—And They Party With Dogs

At first glance, Friday night's meetup at the Bitcoin Center's downtown offices could have passed for any other start-up party. The crowd skewed young, many in hoodies and looking barely grown out of their Chuck Taylors, but mixed in were members of the blazer-and-blue-jeans set and even a select few people above the age of 35. Most, clustered in groups beneath the Center's green-lit high ceilings, stayed largely indifferent to the DJ spinning dance tracks.

But there were some things that were odd. First, there was no booze, due to the small but vocal contingent of grade school kids in attendance. Second, there were the dogs. Also, the people dressed [...]

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Introducing "Oscar-Nominated Songwriter Karen O"

What if Karen O won an Oscar? It could happen! It would be rather magical! Suck it, Williamsburg!

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"I don’t think we’ll all be paying in bitcoin for tickets to Kanye West’s 2024 presidential victory tour."

You can’t use bitcoin for much today besides gambling in online casinos and reserving seats on Virgin Galactic spaceflights, and a vast majority of it is held by speculators. Even with the imprimatur of government regulation, the promise of bitcoin seems to end with helping online retailers avoid credit-card processing fees. Bitcoin is mainly innovative in the way of credit default swaps: new ways to gamble with money.

Thomas L. Friedman is off today, so here's this.