Vanity Fair tummler Jim Windolf would like you to know that Hitler wasn't actually killed by a marauding gang of American Jews. Just in case you're confused, you pishers.

Arkansas State Sen. Kim Hendren, who is seeking to unseat Democratic incumbent U.S. Sen. Blanche Lambert Lincoln, apologized for a recent reference he made about New York's senior senator at a local Republican committee meeting: I don't use a teleprompter and occasionally I put my foot in my month. At the meeting I was attempting to explain that unlike Sen. Schumer, I believe in traditional values, like we used to see on 'The Andy Griffith Show.' I made the mistake of referring to Sen. Schumer as 'that Jew' and I should not have put it that way as this took away from what I was trying to say.

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Miniature Hebraic scriveners Paul Krugman and Thomas Friedman are occasionally confused for one another! Someone make sure David Brooks does not grow any facial hair, or things are going to get farcical.

This is the best way to understand Woody Allen, from the man himself, in the first interview with Woody and Larry David about the upcoming Whatever Works: "I think my philosophy has been consistent over the years, and it appears either persuasive or idiotic depending on how good the film is."

News Jews can use! Please welcome Tablet magazine. Ha, it has a blog called "The Scroll." YAY, JEWISH PUNS. Also, pretty much every Jew we have ever met works there.

"If you ever forget you're a Jew," wrote Bernard Malamud, "a Gentile will remind you." But sometimes a Jew will too. Take David Sax, who writes about "the New Yiddishists" for Vanity Fair. Have you heard about the New Yiddishists? Of course you haven't; Sax just made them up. Apparently they're a "new breed of American Jewish writers… responsible for a renaissance in Jewish storytelling that is turning the narrative of assimilation on its head."