The Awl http://www.theawl.com/ Be Less Stupid Fri, 09 Dec 2011 12:20:53 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.2 Story Has Everything You Want in a Story http://www.theawl.com/2011/12/story-has-everything-you-want-in-a-story http://www.theawl.com/2011/12/story-has-everything-you-want-in-a-story#comments Fri, 09 Dec 2011 12:20:53 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/12/story-has-everything-you-want-in-a-story Oh yes: this is the story that has it all, baby: Four Loko, insurance scams, foreclosures, a retired ladies detective club, RICO complaints, fake absentee ballots, the FBI, Las Vegas, offshore bank accounts and actual broken kneecaps. Stick with it, it gets crazier and crazier.

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Oh yes: this is the story that has it all, baby: Four Loko, insurance scams, foreclosures, a retired ladies detective club, RICO complaints, fake absentee ballots, the FBI, Las Vegas, offshore bank accounts and actual broken kneecaps. Stick with it, it gets crazier and crazier.

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Do Not Under (Almost) Any Circumstances Buy a Home http://www.theawl.com/2011/05/do-not-under-almost-any-circumstances-buy-a-home http://www.theawl.com/2011/05/do-not-under-almost-any-circumstances-buy-a-home#comments Tue, 31 May 2011 12:40:31 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/05/do-not-under-almost-any-circumstances-buy-a-home Bank of America is paying just $20 million for having foreclosed improperly on 160 active-duty military service personnel. (This, of course, was frequent predatory lender suit-settler Countrywide in action; Bank of America purchased Countrywide in January, 2008, for $4.1 billion in stock, and has paid for it more and more ever since, including the former CEO's SEC settlements.) But $20 million! That's nothing, in the grand scheme of the forthcoming housing disaster. For one thing, there are about half as many foreclosed houses being sold now as there were two years go: at this new pace, "it would take exactly three years to clear the current inventory of 1.9 million properties already on the banks’ books, or in foreclosure." And then there will be no houses in foreclosure! Just kidding. There'll be tons more! Both new ones, and let's not forget that litigation has stalled a huge number of foreclosures. All that will get dumped on the market, even as housing prices are down 33.1 percent from summer of 2006 and 28% of all single-family mortgages are underwater.

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Bank of America is paying just $20 million for having foreclosed improperly on 160 active-duty military service personnel. (This, of course, was frequent predatory lender suit-settler Countrywide in action; Bank of America purchased Countrywide in January, 2008, for $4.1 billion in stock, and has paid for it more and more ever since, including the former CEO's SEC settlements.) But $20 million! That's nothing, in the grand scheme of the forthcoming housing disaster. For one thing, there are about half as many foreclosed houses being sold now as there were two years go: at this new pace, "it would take exactly three years to clear the current inventory of 1.9 million properties already on the banks’ books, or in foreclosure." And then there will be no houses in foreclosure! Just kidding. There'll be tons more! Both new ones, and let's not forget that litigation has stalled a huge number of foreclosures. All that will get dumped on the market, even as housing prices are down 33.1 percent from summer of 2006 and 28% of all single-family mortgages are underwater.

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The Rain in Spain Something Something on the Debt-Ridded Homeless http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/the-rain-in-spain-something-something-on-the-debt-ridded-homeless http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/the-rain-in-spain-something-something-on-the-debt-ridded-homeless#comments Thu, 28 Oct 2010 10:30:16 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/the-rain-in-spain-something-something-on-the-debt-ridded-homeless I'm not quite sure what the Times means by "personal liability mortgages" in their fascinating story today on the insanity of foreclosures in Spain, because that phrase doesn't really exist in English. But, yow, I did have no idea that repossession wasn't the end of owing money on loans and mortgages, and that mortgage debt was excluded from bankruptcies in Spain. Maybe there are actually ways in which the U.S. looks out for individuals that is better for people than they way it is done in Europe! Huh. Still, it is hilarious to look back at this BusinessWeek article from 2007, which declares Europe's mortgage and housing and banking industries to be sound and untouchable, while now we are talking about "Spain’s giddy real estate boom" and 1.4 million people there are facing foreclosure.

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I'm not quite sure what the Times means by "personal liability mortgages" in their fascinating story today on the insanity of foreclosures in Spain, because that phrase doesn't really exist in English. But, yow, I did have no idea that repossession wasn't the end of owing money on loans and mortgages, and that mortgage debt was excluded from bankruptcies in Spain. Maybe there are actually ways in which the U.S. looks out for individuals that is better for people than they way it is done in Europe! Huh. Still, it is hilarious to look back at this BusinessWeek article from 2007, which declares Europe's mortgage and housing and banking industries to be sound and untouchable, while now we are talking about "Spain’s giddy real estate boom" and 1.4 million people there are facing foreclosure.

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Rent Is Too Damn Scary http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/rent-is-too-damn-scary http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/rent-is-too-damn-scary#comments Mon, 25 Oct 2010 12:00:41 +0000 Alex Balk http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/rent-is-too-damn-scary Your datapoint of the day: 51% of Americans would live with a ghost as long as rent were free, while 27% would share space with a spectre for a 50% reduction in rent. No word on how many people are willing to split the bill with werewolves and vampires, but I'm sure USA Today will get to that soon enough. [Via]

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Your datapoint of the day: 51% of Americans would live with a ghost as long as rent were free, while 27% would share space with a spectre for a 50% reduction in rent. No word on how many people are willing to split the bill with werewolves and vampires, but I'm sure USA Today will get to that soon enough. [Via]

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Should You Buy A Foreclosed House? http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/should-you-buy-a-foreclosed-house http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/should-you-buy-a-foreclosed-house#comments Fri, 01 Oct 2010 10:53:08 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/10/should-you-buy-a-foreclosed-house ...1. Probably not, seeing as the people who own the houses are retaining titles left and right because apparently few financial institutions can actually follow the foreclosure guidelines. Bad news for Nevada, Arizona and California, where about half of home sales are of foreclosed houses.

2. Also you probably should not buy a foreclosed house if you already have one that you're living in and the marshals are banging at the door. (You should, however, get a lawyer!)

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...1. Probably not, seeing as the people who own the houses are retaining titles left and right because apparently few financial institutions can actually follow the foreclosure guidelines. Bad news for Nevada, Arizona and California, where about half of home sales are of foreclosed houses.

2. Also you probably should not buy a foreclosed house if you already have one that you're living in and the marshals are banging at the door. (You should, however, get a lawyer!)

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Trashing Out the Foreclosures: Paul Reyes, "Exiles in Eden" http://www.theawl.com/2010/09/trashing-out-the-foreclosures-paul-reyes-exiles-in-eden http://www.theawl.com/2010/09/trashing-out-the-foreclosures-paul-reyes-exiles-in-eden#comments Thu, 09 Sep 2010 11:00:14 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/09/trashing-out-the-foreclosures-paul-reyes-exiles-in-eden The FedRecently I went to visit an acquaintance who was trashing out his own condo. There were hinges to be pried out of doorways and appliances to take for eBay. The house had become inert, a non-house: trapped somewhere between the building's association who wanted the fees owed to pay for the building's roof and walls and the like, the people who wanted the property taxes to pay for things like schools and street lights and roads and the people who were in charge of collecting (or more likely not collecting) the mortgage for whomever actually owned the mortgage debt (at the end of that chain, quite possibly you and me). These various claimants made the house largely worthless-more worthless than the latest assessment, which was... well, a comparable apartment nearby had recently sold for $120,000. It had been listed at $325,000 in May, 2009. That $120,000 sale price was not much higher than that apartment's last sale-twenty years ago.

Anyway, it was somewhat likely that, after the investment of some work on this apartment that was being trashed out, such as providing it with new door hinges and appliances, the association would find a renter unafraid of a possibly surprising ending to his rental agreement term in exchange for a below-market rent. That would be a best outcome.

The others would most likely find no purchase for their attempts to collect (the owner was protected by bankruptcy), and certainly the bank had little incentive to collect the mortgage, although their claims on the title would likely make finding a purchaser difficult.

One of the few chairs remaining in the near-vacant condo was occupied by someone on the other side, as it were. Someone not in bankruptcy, for one thing. This person had recently made a $200,000 offer on two-bedroom apartment in a nice part of town. (Needless to say, this town was not New York City.)

But when he had gone to get a mortgage, the bank had balked, because that apartment now assessed at half that value, and so now his current offer for the two-bedroom was at something like $78,000, having come up from something like $65,000 or $72,000. That offer number was jiggling and that title too was somewhat not entirely not cloudy, because that condo association was trying to get a bit of the sale money for past unpaid maintenance under the old owner, which seems, if logical, a bit short-sighted of the association's best interests. They ran the risk of receiving zero dollars instead of some dollars, by dragging the potential new owner into someone else's debt.

But then, we're pretty much all subject to someone else's debt these days, even those of us who rent. Renters are shielded from what is happening with a property, except when they receive a stray envelope addressed to their landlords, or the records pop up online-and the record-keeping systems, when I look up mortgages and sales online, seem to me to be bogged down and very tardy. I imagine the one or two municipal employees in each town in America with the responsibility of making these things public crouched in some little cave, with a stack of depressing white and red and yellow paper towering over their little desks. (Really, it's probably all done by computers. With near- or off-shored labor-somewhere in Utah or Israel.)

In any event, there it was: the magical $78,000 two-bedroom apartment. The steal of a lifetime. The great American get-ahead.

I bring this up in part because this Sunday, at the Brooklyn Book Festival, there is a panel at noon which includes Naomi Klein and Kurt Andersen and Jordan Flaherty and also Paul Reyes. His new book, Exiles in Eden-some of which is in the August issue of Harper's-is an account of going to work for his father, who has for some time now been a trasher-outer of abandoned and foreclosed homes. In the book, Reyes follows the trail of breadcrumbs of the people who've abandoned or been evicted from their houses to the foreclosure auctions, and along the way meets people like the housing advocates who've installed squatters in vacant properties.

(The panel is slotted against "Me... In The World," which stars Sam Lipsyte, and a panel called "Pop Life: Music, Memory, and America's Coming of Age," with Ta-Nehisi Coates, which may be more appealing and relaxing and better-attended, but then we all have to make difficult choices in these times.)

Reyes did the first reading from his book the other week and something odd happened. He did not get author-friendly questions about the precious process of writing his book. Instead, a long discussion ensued among the audience members about the financial system and the housing market. In the audience were brokers and bankers and homeowners and renters. A mass of anecdotage and experience and theory was shared. It was something like an impromptu consciousness-raising session, very thorough, and when the audience left, everyone had had time to sift through his and her experiences with the state of our financial system and to incorporate some fresh input.

"The audience reaction was exactly what I'd hoped for," Reyes wrote to me the other day. "I'm certainly happy to stand up there and blather for twenty minutes, but I'd much rather have an intense discussion about this issue and hear what people have been through and what their ideas are."

Although he'll be taking this conversation to the Times' Opinionator blog's Living Rooms section soon, he does not have at this time many in-person readings scheduled; author reading tours are not booked by publishers much these days.

"I'm trying to work the promotion of the book into a split personality tour of sorts–between the narrative journalist and housing wonk," Reyes wrote. "If all goes well, I'll drop in on university classes in the daytime, then hit the bookstores at night. I'll wear a different pair of glasses for each role, of course."

Next week, on the 14th, Reyes will be reading as well at the Enoch Pratt Library in Baltimore. Perhaps you'd like him to visit your fine local bookstore, classroom or community center. His email address is on his website.

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The FedRecently I went to visit an acquaintance who was trashing out his own condo. There were hinges to be pried out of doorways and appliances to take for eBay. The house had become inert, a non-house: trapped somewhere between the building's association who wanted the fees owed to pay for the building's roof and walls and the like, the people who wanted the property taxes to pay for things like schools and street lights and roads and the people who were in charge of collecting (or more likely not collecting) the mortgage for whomever actually owned the mortgage debt (at the end of that chain, quite possibly you and me). These various claimants made the house largely worthless-more worthless than the latest assessment, which was... well, a comparable apartment nearby had recently sold for $120,000. It had been listed at $325,000 in May, 2009. That $120,000 sale price was not much higher than that apartment's last sale-twenty years ago.

Anyway, it was somewhat likely that, after the investment of some work on this apartment that was being trashed out, such as providing it with new door hinges and appliances, the association would find a renter unafraid of a possibly surprising ending to his rental agreement term in exchange for a below-market rent. That would be a best outcome.

The others would most likely find no purchase for their attempts to collect (the owner was protected by bankruptcy), and certainly the bank had little incentive to collect the mortgage, although their claims on the title would likely make finding a purchaser difficult.

One of the few chairs remaining in the near-vacant condo was occupied by someone on the other side, as it were. Someone not in bankruptcy, for one thing. This person had recently made a $200,000 offer on two-bedroom apartment in a nice part of town. (Needless to say, this town was not New York City.)

But when he had gone to get a mortgage, the bank had balked, because that apartment now assessed at half that value, and so now his current offer for the two-bedroom was at something like $78,000, having come up from something like $65,000 or $72,000. That offer number was jiggling and that title too was somewhat not entirely not cloudy, because that condo association was trying to get a bit of the sale money for past unpaid maintenance under the old owner, which seems, if logical, a bit short-sighted of the association's best interests. They ran the risk of receiving zero dollars instead of some dollars, by dragging the potential new owner into someone else's debt.

But then, we're pretty much all subject to someone else's debt these days, even those of us who rent. Renters are shielded from what is happening with a property, except when they receive a stray envelope addressed to their landlords, or the records pop up online-and the record-keeping systems, when I look up mortgages and sales online, seem to me to be bogged down and very tardy. I imagine the one or two municipal employees in each town in America with the responsibility of making these things public crouched in some little cave, with a stack of depressing white and red and yellow paper towering over their little desks. (Really, it's probably all done by computers. With near- or off-shored labor-somewhere in Utah or Israel.)

In any event, there it was: the magical $78,000 two-bedroom apartment. The steal of a lifetime. The great American get-ahead.

I bring this up in part because this Sunday, at the Brooklyn Book Festival, there is a panel at noon which includes Naomi Klein and Kurt Andersen and Jordan Flaherty and also Paul Reyes. His new book, Exiles in Eden-some of which is in the August issue of Harper's-is an account of going to work for his father, who has for some time now been a trasher-outer of abandoned and foreclosed homes. In the book, Reyes follows the trail of breadcrumbs of the people who've abandoned or been evicted from their houses to the foreclosure auctions, and along the way meets people like the housing advocates who've installed squatters in vacant properties.

(The panel is slotted against "Me... In The World," which stars Sam Lipsyte, and a panel called "Pop Life: Music, Memory, and America's Coming of Age," with Ta-Nehisi Coates, which may be more appealing and relaxing and better-attended, but then we all have to make difficult choices in these times.)

Reyes did the first reading from his book the other week and something odd happened. He did not get author-friendly questions about the precious process of writing his book. Instead, a long discussion ensued among the audience members about the financial system and the housing market. In the audience were brokers and bankers and homeowners and renters. A mass of anecdotage and experience and theory was shared. It was something like an impromptu consciousness-raising session, very thorough, and when the audience left, everyone had had time to sift through his and her experiences with the state of our financial system and to incorporate some fresh input.

"The audience reaction was exactly what I'd hoped for," Reyes wrote to me the other day. "I'm certainly happy to stand up there and blather for twenty minutes, but I'd much rather have an intense discussion about this issue and hear what people have been through and what their ideas are."

Although he'll be taking this conversation to the Times' Opinionator blog's Living Rooms section soon, he does not have at this time many in-person readings scheduled; author reading tours are not booked by publishers much these days.

"I'm trying to work the promotion of the book into a split personality tour of sorts–between the narrative journalist and housing wonk," Reyes wrote. "If all goes well, I'll drop in on university classes in the daytime, then hit the bookstores at night. I'll wear a different pair of glasses for each role, of course."

Next week, on the 14th, Reyes will be reading as well at the Enoch Pratt Library in Baltimore. Perhaps you'd like him to visit your fine local bookstore, classroom or community center. His email address is on his website.

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Manhattan's Millionaires-on-Paper (May Be Mostly In Brooklyn!) http://www.theawl.com/2010/08/manhattans-millionaires-on-paper-may-be-mostly-in-brooklyn http://www.theawl.com/2010/08/manhattans-millionaires-on-paper-may-be-mostly-in-brooklyn#comments Wed, 04 Aug 2010 10:30:21 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/08/manhattans-millionaires-on-paper-may-be-mostly-in-brooklyn TWO OF THEM?In looking at the recent wild estimate that there are 667,200 "millionaires" in New York City-supposedly up nearly 20% from 2008-it's important to pull back and look at what makes someone a millionaire on paper. The number one marker in New York City of this semi-mythical, marvelous status is home ownership.

We'll do this in some very nice round numbers!

There's 1.2 million houses in New York City, of the city's 3.3 million housing units. (So: twice as many apartments as houses, basically.)

So, already, you know: someone owns 3.3 million housing units! Clearly lots of these are owned in big batches-landlords like Pinnacle, for a random example, own 21,000 housing units in different buildings.

Still, despite the big landlords, home ownership rate among all New York City residents is almost exactly 1 in 3.

(It skews hard by borough, obviously: in Staten Island, it's more than 2 in 3; in Queens, it's about 1 in 2; in Manhattan, it's 1 in 4.)

Home owners are, unsurprisingly, way more likely to be wealthy. The median income of renters is around $36,000. (By the way, of all renters, nearly 1 in 3 pay more than half their income in rent.) The median income of a home owner is twice that of a renter.

In Manhattan, there's about 750,000 households, where about 1.5 million people live. (There are something like 80,000 single-family dwellings-you know, "houses." All told, about 150,000 of Manhattan's housing units are owner-occupied. You can pretty much guarantee that anyone who owns a single-family dwelling in Manhattan is a millionaire.)

1.2 million of Manhattanites are over 18-and only about half of the people who are older than 25 have a college degree.

So we can discount from our "rich list" those without college degrees, pretty much, because, duh-which means that, eerily, the number of people who are allegedly millionaires-on-paper in New York City is almost exactly equal to the number of adults who reside in Manhattan who have a college degree.

So, wait, some of you are saying: I'm over 25 and have a college degree and I live in Manhattan and I'm not a millionaire!

That's because you're a disgrace. If you're over 25, college-educated, a native English speaker, you reside in Manhattan and are not a millionaire? Technically you are a huge failure.

But don't worry too much. The real reason you're not a millionaire is because there's apparently a really large number of millionaires-on-paper in Brooklyn Heights, Cobble Hill, Carroll Gardens and Park Slope, obviously.

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TWO OF THEM?In looking at the recent wild estimate that there are 667,200 "millionaires" in New York City-supposedly up nearly 20% from 2008-it's important to pull back and look at what makes someone a millionaire on paper. The number one marker in New York City of this semi-mythical, marvelous status is home ownership.

We'll do this in some very nice round numbers!

There's 1.2 million houses in New York City, of the city's 3.3 million housing units. (So: twice as many apartments as houses, basically.)

So, already, you know: someone owns 3.3 million housing units! Clearly lots of these are owned in big batches-landlords like Pinnacle, for a random example, own 21,000 housing units in different buildings.

Still, despite the big landlords, home ownership rate among all New York City residents is almost exactly 1 in 3.

(It skews hard by borough, obviously: in Staten Island, it's more than 2 in 3; in Queens, it's about 1 in 2; in Manhattan, it's 1 in 4.)

Home owners are, unsurprisingly, way more likely to be wealthy. The median income of renters is around $36,000. (By the way, of all renters, nearly 1 in 3 pay more than half their income in rent.) The median income of a home owner is twice that of a renter.

In Manhattan, there's about 750,000 households, where about 1.5 million people live. (There are something like 80,000 single-family dwellings-you know, "houses." All told, about 150,000 of Manhattan's housing units are owner-occupied. You can pretty much guarantee that anyone who owns a single-family dwelling in Manhattan is a millionaire.)

1.2 million of Manhattanites are over 18-and only about half of the people who are older than 25 have a college degree.

So we can discount from our "rich list" those without college degrees, pretty much, because, duh-which means that, eerily, the number of people who are allegedly millionaires-on-paper in New York City is almost exactly equal to the number of adults who reside in Manhattan who have a college degree.

So, wait, some of you are saying: I'm over 25 and have a college degree and I live in Manhattan and I'm not a millionaire!

That's because you're a disgrace. If you're over 25, college-educated, a native English speaker, you reside in Manhattan and are not a millionaire? Technically you are a huge failure.

But don't worry too much. The real reason you're not a millionaire is because there's apparently a really large number of millionaires-on-paper in Brooklyn Heights, Cobble Hill, Carroll Gardens and Park Slope, obviously.

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We're on Track to Foreclose on One Million Homes This Year http://www.theawl.com/2010/07/were-on-track-to-foreclose-on-one-million-homes-this-year http://www.theawl.com/2010/07/were-on-track-to-foreclose-on-one-million-homes-this-year#comments Thu, 15 Jul 2010 10:10:20 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/07/were-on-track-to-foreclose-on-one-million-homes-this-year GOOD JOB AMERICAAs the data has suggested for some time, we're doing well with our plan to put a million people out of their homes this year. "One of every 78 U.S. housing units, or 1.28% of the total, was subject to at least one foreclosure filing in the first six months of the year. That's a total of 1.65 million properties." By the way, how correlated are unemployment and foreclosure rates? Math explains: quite.

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GOOD JOB AMERICAAs the data has suggested for some time, we're doing well with our plan to put a million people out of their homes this year. "One of every 78 U.S. housing units, or 1.28% of the total, was subject to at least one foreclosure filing in the first six months of the year. That's a total of 1.65 million properties." By the way, how correlated are unemployment and foreclosure rates? Math explains: quite.

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Graphed: U.S. Foreclosures and Home Repossessions, 2005 to 2010 http://www.theawl.com/2010/06/graphed-u-s-foreclosures-and-home-repossessions-2005-to-2010 http://www.theawl.com/2010/06/graphed-u-s-foreclosures-and-home-repossessions-2005-to-2010#comments Fri, 04 Jun 2010 11:40:19 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/06/graphed-u-s-foreclosures-and-home-repossessions-2005-to-2010 It's hard to get a sense of what's going on in America with foreclosure filings, the number of homes being foreclosed on and the actual number of houses being taken back by banks. The newspapers are confusing! Are they "down"? Are they "up"? So we dug up the actual numbers for each year since 2005, up to the projected numbers for 2010. A "foreclosure filing" can be a number of things, including notice of default, auction or seizure-which is why the actual number of houses receiving these notices is a useful number to know.

Foreclosures

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It's hard to get a sense of what's going on in America with foreclosure filings, the number of homes being foreclosed on and the actual number of houses being taken back by banks. The newspapers are confusing! Are they "down"? Are they "up"? So we dug up the actual numbers for each year since 2005, up to the projected numbers for 2010. A "foreclosure filing" can be a number of things, including notice of default, auction or seizure-which is why the actual number of houses receiving these notices is a useful number to know.

Foreclosures

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Breaking Matt Bai Housing Update Just In! http://www.theawl.com/2010/03/breaking-matt-bai-housing-update-just-in http://www.theawl.com/2010/03/breaking-matt-bai-housing-update-just-in#comments Fri, 19 Mar 2010 14:30:58 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/03/breaking-matt-bai-housing-update-just-in HOUSE?When Matt Bai, a Times reporter and Yankees fan in his early 40s with two children, wanted to buy a new house, the mortgage brokers laughed at him! But he had perfect credit, and had only bought his last home six years ago! (It was a "center-hall colonial on a corner lot three blocks from the subway and American University.") Then he found out that his nanny had a very bad mortgage on her house, the payments of which were 75% of her income. And so he bought a new house, a "spacious, if deteriorated split-level," even though the counter tops were ugly, with a nice, 30-year, fixed-rate mortgage. And then he wrote about all of this at work.

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HOUSE?When Matt Bai, a Times reporter and Yankees fan in his early 40s with two children, wanted to buy a new house, the mortgage brokers laughed at him! But he had perfect credit, and had only bought his last home six years ago! (It was a "center-hall colonial on a corner lot three blocks from the subway and American University.") Then he found out that his nanny had a very bad mortgage on her house, the payments of which were 75% of her income. And so he bought a new house, a "spacious, if deteriorated split-level," even though the counter tops were ugly, with a nice, 30-year, fixed-rate mortgage. And then he wrote about all of this at work.

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