Posts Tagged: Go Pack Go

NFL Playoff Sonnet Picks

Saturday, January 12

At Denver -9.5 Baltimore

We all know that Ray Lewis can still dance. But catch a sure interception? Fat chance. He looks like RoboCop with that arm brace. And half a season out has slowed his pace. Can the Ravens win? It’s up to Flacco. Picking them here might seem kinda wacko. Mile High Stadium air is pretty thin And old guys tend to get tired therein. Peyton Manning leads a vicious attack. He gets five touchdowns from flat on his back. Knowshon Moreno can carry the ball Will the Purple Guys stand up like dry wall? Against the Ravens defense I won’t bet. And [...]


Football Pick Haikus For Week 8

Thursday, October 25

At Minnesota -6 Tampa Bay

Vikings should crush Bucs. Flip channels only during World Series innings. PICK: VIKINGS

Sunday, October 28

New England -7 St. Louis (At London)

New England visits Regular England. Brady Defects to Man U. PICK: PATRIOTS


Football Pick Haikus For Week 3

Thursday, September 20

At Carolina -2.5 NY Giants

Cam Newton versus Giants' torched secondary? I smell barbeque! PICK: PANTHERS

Sunday, September 23

At Chicago -7.5 St. Louis

Jay Cutler is not one of those quarterbacks that you want on your team. PICK: RAMS

At Dallas -8 Tampa Bay

Most of Mitt Romney’s 47% are Dallas Cowboy fans. PICK: COWBOYS


Football Pick Haikus For Week 12

Thursday, November 22—Thanksgiving!

Houston -3 At Detroit

While you are eating turkey the Lions will be getting their ass kicked. PICK: TEXANS

At Dallas -3 Washington

While you are taking a tryptophan nap Romo will be screwing up. PICK: REDSKINS

New England -6.5 At NY Jets

While you’re at a bar avoiding your family the Jets will still suck. PICK: PATRIOTS


Football Pick Haikus For Week 6

Thursday, October 11

Pittsburgh -6 At Tennessee

Troy Polamalu Is injured again. Titans avoid an execution. PICK: TITANS.

Biden -3 v. Ryan

Joe’s always gaffe-prone but Ryan tends to just make shit completely up. PICK: BIDEN

Sunday, October 14

Cincinnati -1 At Cleveland

I grew up Democrat. I have a soft spot for all pathetic losers. PICK: BROWNS


Football Pick Haikus For Week 9

Thursday, November 1

At San Diego -7.5 Kansas City

I’m hoping Chiefs’ star cornerback Brandon Flowers gets six pick sixes PICK: CHIEFS

Sunday, November 4

Denver -3.5 At Cincinnati

The Bengals will play great and then Peyton Manning will steal their candy. PICK: BRONCOS

At Green Bay -11 Arizona

I’m sick of losing cash betting against the Green Bay Packers every week. PICK: PACKERS


Football Pick Haikus For Week 5

Thursday, October 4

Arizona -1.5 At St. Louis

The Cardinals still are Undefeated but seem ripe For a huge letdown. PICK: RAMS

Sunday, October 7

Atlanta -3 At Washington

Matty Ryan used to bull's-eye womp rats in his T-16 back home. PICK: FALCONS

At Pittsburgh -3.5 Philadelphia

Michael Vick is one Sack away from becoming A McRib Sandwich. PICK: STEELERS