Of all the disgusting phenomena in Knifecrime Island, perhaps the filthiest is a fetish so foul it beggars belief that an entire nation could be caught in its gruesome grip. And yet it does indeed exist. When British people aren't busy slashing each other with broken glass you'll find them, I am sorry to say, participating in the nauseating activity known as "dogging."

"If that is happening, it shows that there is use of condoms and I think that is a very positive story. Athletes are being responsible." -Commonwealth Games Federation President Mike Fennell addresses reports that the drainage system in the athlete's village cannot handle the thousands of condoms that have been flushed down its toilets. The Games-the quadrennial athletic competition between current and former members of the British empire-have already been plagued by late construction, wild dogs, snakes, dengue fever, and, of course packs of rampaging monkeys. I guess it's good that Fennell can still try to see the bright side.

Are you one of the two Sydney college students photographed in the act of copulation atop that city's famous clocktower? If so, please get in touch with Australia's Daily Telegraph. There's probably a quick buck in it for you!