The Awl http://www.theawl.com/ Be Less Stupid Mon, 30 Jan 2012 10:00:25 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.2 Mike Allen Polling the Electorate http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/mike-allen-polling-the-electorate http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/mike-allen-polling-the-electorate#comments Mon, 30 Jan 2012 10:00:25 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/mike-allen-polling-the-electorate Florida's Republican primary is tomorrow (AKA two weeks ago, since everyone votes in advance or by absentee ballot or from beyond/near the grave), and so the Mainstream Media is yucking it up in the Republican districts! For instance here is Politico's Mike Allen in South Beach today with some likely Republican voters (including a fellow named BurgerBillionz) who are having a 6 a.m. nightcap-dinner while "Morning Joe" prepares to live-broadcast. (Which looks less interesting.) Word of advice: don't actually eat at Jerry's Deli. (Picture by MSNBC's Lauren Skowronski.)

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]]> Florida's Republican primary is tomorrow (AKA two weeks ago, since everyone votes in advance or by absentee ballot or from beyond/near the grave), and so the Mainstream Media is yucking it up in the Republican districts! For instance here is Politico's Mike Allen in South Beach today with some likely Republican voters (including a fellow named BurgerBillionz) who are having a 6 a.m. nightcap-dinner while "Morning Joe" prepares to live-broadcast. (Which looks less interesting.) Word of advice: don't actually eat at Jerry's Deli. (Picture by MSNBC's Lauren Skowronski.)

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/mike-allen-polling-the-electorate/feed 2 Florida Child Born in Florida Manner http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/florida-child-born-in-florida-manner http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/florida-child-born-in-florida-manner#comments Tue, 03 Jan 2012 15:20:07 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/florida-child-born-in-florida-manner "Ana Johana Irias, 26, was using an ATM near Northwest 36th Street and 13th Avenue when a teenager drove by one a bike and snatched her $800 gold necklace from around her neck. Despite being more than eight months pregnant, Irias decided to chase down the crook.... The crook eventually escaped by hop[p]ing over a fence.... Police convinced Irias to get checked out at Jackson-Memorial Hospital. Doctors there discovered that she was in labor, and shortly after the new year's came, at 12:15 to be exact, Irias gave birth to 6 pound, 6 ounce baby girl named Kimberly."
—Naturally.

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]]> "Ana Johana Irias, 26, was using an ATM near Northwest 36th Street and 13th Avenue when a teenager drove by one a bike and snatched her $800 gold necklace from around her neck. Despite being more than eight months pregnant, Irias decided to chase down the crook.... The crook eventually escaped by hop[p]ing over a fence.... Police convinced Irias to get checked out at Jackson-Memorial Hospital. Doctors there discovered that she was in labor, and shortly after the new year's came, at 12:15 to be exact, Irias gave birth to 6 pound, 6 ounce baby girl named Kimberly."
—Naturally.

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2012/01/florida-child-born-in-florida-manner/feed 12 Steve Berke Will Not Be the Mayor of Miami Beach (For Now) http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/steve-berke-will-not-be-the-mayor-of-miami-beach-for-now http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/steve-berke-will-not-be-the-mayor-of-miami-beach-for-now#comments Wed, 02 Nov 2011 11:40:50 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/steve-berke-will-not-be-the-mayor-of-miami-beach-for-now The small-town mayoral campaign covered everywhere from Maxim to the Times has ended with the easy reelection of the incumbent and with unimpressive voter turnout. 72-year-old Miami Beach mayor Matti Bower received 59.4% of the vote for her final term, which represents all of 4,096 votes. (In total, 6,888 people voted; of those, comedian-and-reality-show-dude challenger Steve Berke received 1612, almost a quarter.) Berke's entry into the race, with the management of Roger Stone (yes, him) was intended to engage younger voters, to promote Miami Beach as a hip resort town and to rile up the city. Berke's latest strategies were pretty vicious: his literature touted his Yale degree and referred to Bower as a high school dropout, and, for a pro-nightclub and pro-party candidate, he's come out real hard against Urban Beach Weekend, wherein black people from all over the country fill up the town's expensive hotel rooms and bring a great influx of cash to the city and non-black people complain about it and then the police harass, detain and/or shoot the visitors. Whether it was that message, or union support of the incumbent, or whether voters were not willing to be moved, it didn't result in a victory.

But if, perhaps, new voters did turn out, then previous voters stayed away, because only 88% of the number of voters came out this election compared to 2009. In 2009, Bower received 5768 votes, out of 7764—76.5% of the vote. So Berke, to his credit, did do some damage. Thankfully, the next election can't possibly be as nasty. (OR CAN IT.)

Berke's party, called The After Party, is supposed to be a Libertarian-leaning model of getting young people in office in smaller towns with nightlife industries; they've been scouting for candidates in other cities, including in California, but they have some kinks to work out. Getting people under 50 to turn out to vote isn't a cinch; Berke's exhausted face at his non-victory party last night is evidence of that.

Berke has already promised on Facebook he'll run again in 2013—with no incumbent to oppose him. That means he gets a year off, during which time his people will likely edit down the thousands of hours of video he's shot and try to make a show out of it.

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]]> The small-town mayoral campaign covered everywhere from Maxim to the Times has ended with the easy reelection of the incumbent and with unimpressive voter turnout. 72-year-old Miami Beach mayor Matti Bower received 59.4% of the vote for her final term, which represents all of 4,096 votes. (In total, 6,888 people voted; of those, comedian-and-reality-show-dude challenger Steve Berke received 1612, almost a quarter.) Berke's entry into the race, with the management of Roger Stone (yes, him) was intended to engage younger voters, to promote Miami Beach as a hip resort town and to rile up the city. Berke's latest strategies were pretty vicious: his literature touted his Yale degree and referred to Bower as a high school dropout, and, for a pro-nightclub and pro-party candidate, he's come out real hard against Urban Beach Weekend, wherein black people from all over the country fill up the town's expensive hotel rooms and bring a great influx of cash to the city and non-black people complain about it and then the police harass, detain and/or shoot the visitors. Whether it was that message, or union support of the incumbent, or whether voters were not willing to be moved, it didn't result in a victory.

But if, perhaps, new voters did turn out, then previous voters stayed away, because only 88% of the number of voters came out this election compared to 2009. In 2009, Bower received 5768 votes, out of 7764—76.5% of the vote. So Berke, to his credit, did do some damage. Thankfully, the next election can't possibly be as nasty. (OR CAN IT.)

Berke's party, called The After Party, is supposed to be a Libertarian-leaning model of getting young people in office in smaller towns with nightlife industries; they've been scouting for candidates in other cities, including in California, but they have some kinks to work out. Getting people under 50 to turn out to vote isn't a cinch; Berke's exhausted face at his non-victory party last night is evidence of that.

Berke has already promised on Facebook he'll run again in 2013—with no incumbent to oppose him. That means he gets a year off, during which time his people will likely edit down the thousands of hours of video he's shot and try to make a show out of it.

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/11/steve-berke-will-not-be-the-mayor-of-miami-beach-for-now/feed 6 Teen Girl Busted With 1/3rd of Body Weight in Cocaine http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/teen-girl-busted-with-13rd-of-body-weight-in-cocaine http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/teen-girl-busted-with-13rd-of-body-weight-in-cocaine#comments Thu, 27 Oct 2011 13:50:04 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/teen-girl-busted-with-13rd-of-body-weight-in-cocaine "Detectives at Miami International Airport busted a London teen who they say was carrying nearly 30 pounds of cocaine — stuffed in 24 boxes of cake mix. Ayesha Olivia Niles, a waifish 5-foot-4, 105-pound student, had arrived in Miami on a night flight from Jamaica, two suitcases in tow. The teen claimed she did not know what the substance was but admitted 'she suspected that the activity she was involved in was suspicious but she did not question it,' according to the report."
—Oh, girl, what did those boys in Jamaica tell you?

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]]> "Detectives at Miami International Airport busted a London teen who they say was carrying nearly 30 pounds of cocaine — stuffed in 24 boxes of cake mix. Ayesha Olivia Niles, a waifish 5-foot-4, 105-pound student, had arrived in Miami on a night flight from Jamaica, two suitcases in tow. The teen claimed she did not know what the substance was but admitted 'she suspected that the activity she was involved in was suspicious but she did not question it,' according to the report."
—Oh, girl, what did those boys in Jamaica tell you?

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/teen-girl-busted-with-13rd-of-body-weight-in-cocaine/feed 7 Local Paper to Undermine Small (Prostitution) Businesses http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/local-paper-to-undermine-small-prostitution-businesses http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/local-paper-to-undermine-small-prostitution-businesses#comments Tue, 18 Oct 2011 11:10:30 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/local-paper-to-undermine-small-prostitution-businesses
West Palm Beach is bringing back public shaming to deter prostitution.

The City Commission has agreed to post booking photos of johns arrested for soliciting prostitutes on the city's web site.

West Palm Beach received national attention in the 1990s when it enacted a similar program, but it cost the city a $10,000 settlement after a man whose name was printed was acquitted and sued the city.

This time, West Palm Beach will only post the photos of johns who have been arrested more than once.

—PERFECT PLAN.

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]]>
West Palm Beach is bringing back public shaming to deter prostitution.

The City Commission has agreed to post booking photos of johns arrested for soliciting prostitutes on the city's web site.

West Palm Beach received national attention in the 1990s when it enacted a similar program, but it cost the city a $10,000 settlement after a man whose name was printed was acquitted and sued the city.

This time, West Palm Beach will only post the photos of johns who have been arrested more than once.

—PERFECT PLAN.

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/local-paper-to-undermine-small-prostitution-businesses/feed 5 Florida's Tea Party Economics Plan a Total Failure http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/floridas-tea-party-economics-plan-a-total-failure http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/floridas-tea-party-economics-plan-a-total-failure#comments Wed, 12 Oct 2011 11:00:57 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/floridas-tea-party-economics-plan-a-total-failure "Gov. Rick Scott and the Florida Legislature face a $1.5 billion revenue shortfall, state economists said Tuesday....The projections are not what lawmakers had in mind last session when they cut regulations, slashed spending and eliminated more than 4,000 state jobs to balance the $69 billion budget.... Lawmakers also turned away billions in federal transpiration [um, sic?] and health care money, and tried to boost the economy by including $70 million in tax incentives."
—Well, there you have it.

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]]> "Gov. Rick Scott and the Florida Legislature face a $1.5 billion revenue shortfall, state economists said Tuesday....The projections are not what lawmakers had in mind last session when they cut regulations, slashed spending and eliminated more than 4,000 state jobs to balance the $69 billion budget.... Lawmakers also turned away billions in federal transpiration [um, sic?] and health care money, and tried to boost the economy by including $70 million in tax incentives."
—Well, there you have it.

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/floridas-tea-party-economics-plan-a-total-failure/feed 6 Florida Florida http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/florida-florida http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/florida-florida#comments Tue, 11 Oct 2011 14:50:58 +0000 Alex Balk http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/florida-florida I'm kind of amazed that we are still arguing about fluoridating the water here in 2011, but I guess I shouldn't be, because THIS WHOLE COUNTRY IS CRAZY, especially Florida. [Via]

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]]> I'm kind of amazed that we are still arguing about fluoridating the water here in 2011, but I guess I shouldn't be, because THIS WHOLE COUNTRY IS CRAZY, especially Florida. [Via]

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/florida-florida/feed 12 Rich People Island Hotel Now Offers Flash Mobs http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/rich-people-island-hotel-now-offers-flash-mobs http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/rich-people-island-hotel-now-offers-flash-mobs#comments Thu, 06 Oct 2011 15:20:37 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/rich-people-island-hotel-now-offers-flash-mobs "The Marco Island Marriott Beach Resort in Florida adds flash mob services to its amenities list."

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]]> "The Marco Island Marriott Beach Resort in Florida adds flash mob services to its amenities list."

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/10/rich-people-island-hotel-now-offers-flash-mobs/feed 11 Today is Rick Scott's First Killing! http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/today-is-rick-scotts-first-killing http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/today-is-rick-scotts-first-killing#comments Wed, 28 Sep 2011 10:00:27 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/today-is-rick-scotts-first-killing Technically, it's Florida's monstrous, terrible governor Rick Scott's second killing, if you count all the money he made when he was forced out of his own company, as it made the "largest fraud settlement in U.S. history," as it had systematically defrauded the government of millions of dollars. But it's his first killing of a human being! Is everyone terribly upset about the death, six hours from now, of Manuel Valle? Actually, probably yes: even the makers of pentobarbital have written to Rick Scott to ask him not to kill Manuel Valle with their drug. But the victim's family is really very eager for someone to die so that they can feel better.

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]]> Technically, it's Florida's monstrous, terrible governor Rick Scott's second killing, if you count all the money he made when he was forced out of his own company, as it made the "largest fraud settlement in U.S. history," as it had systematically defrauded the government of millions of dollars. But it's his first killing of a human being! Is everyone terribly upset about the death, six hours from now, of Manuel Valle? Actually, probably yes: even the makers of pentobarbital have written to Rick Scott to ask him not to kill Manuel Valle with their drug. But the victim's family is really very eager for someone to die so that they can feel better.

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]]> http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/today-is-rick-scotts-first-killing/feed 14 Crooked Former Cop Busted in Illegal Marmoset Sale http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/former-crooked-cop-busted-in-illegal-marmoset-sale http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/former-crooked-cop-busted-in-illegal-marmoset-sale#comments Wed, 14 Sep 2011 10:20:18 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/09/former-crooked-cop-busted-in-illegal-marmoset-sale "A former Miami-Dade police officer, convicted of shaking down a motorist during a traffic stop, admitted Tuesday to violating his probation—because he got busted for allegedly hawking an illegally kept monkey."
—Florida!

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]]> "A former Miami-Dade police officer, convicted of shaking down a motorist during a traffic stop, admitted Tuesday to violating his probation—because he got busted for allegedly hawking an illegally kept monkey."
—Florida!

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