The Awl http://www.theawl.com/ Be Less Stupid Tue, 10 Nov 2009 15:50:02 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.2 Dakota Fanning's Eyes Have Seen Many Things http://www.theawl.com/2009/11/dakota-fannings-eyes-have-seen-many-things http://www.theawl.com/2009/11/dakota-fannings-eyes-have-seen-many-things#comments Tue, 10 Nov 2009 15:50:02 +0000 Mary HK Choi http://www.theawl.com/2009/11/dakota-fannings-eyes-have-seen-many-things DAKOTA WHAT?Man, I am so the embarrassed emoticon in the face right now because this Dakota Fanning Teen Vogue shoot makes me feel spectacularly gonzo in the crotch. I KNOOOOOW. I'm SORRY but I CAN'T HELP IT because I don't think it even matters if you're a dirty old man or not because her freakshow precocious eyes accuse you of thinking things and then forgives you and the whole thing makes me feel filthy.

THE LEOPARD
ESPECIALLY because: animal print. I mean, can a cub be a cougar?!! IDK! So confused. She sort of looks like Madonna in those old Versace ads where she looks like she'd smell of ylang ylang and 982734982374983 kinds of semen. Oh man, now I'm picturing her swiveling around in a chair REALLY SLOWLY in a white sleeveless turtleneck mini dress and everyone knows I hate when turtlenecks have no sleeves. MAKE IT STOP.

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]]> DAKOTA WHAT?Man, I am so the embarrassed emoticon in the face right now because this Dakota Fanning Teen Vogue shoot makes me feel spectacularly gonzo in the crotch. I KNOOOOOW. I'm SORRY but I CAN'T HELP IT because I don't think it even matters if you're a dirty old man or not because her freakshow precocious eyes accuse you of thinking things and then forgives you and the whole thing makes me feel filthy.

THE LEOPARD
ESPECIALLY because: animal print. I mean, can a cub be a cougar?!! IDK! So confused. She sort of looks like Madonna in those old Versace ads where she looks like she'd smell of ylang ylang and 982734982374983 kinds of semen. Oh man, now I'm picturing her swiveling around in a chair REALLY SLOWLY in a white sleeveless turtleneck mini dress and everyone knows I hate when turtlenecks have no sleeves. MAKE IT STOP.

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See more posts by Mary HK Choi

50 comments

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