The End of the 00s: The Debt Regret Matrix, by Jessanne Collins @10:30 AM
There's something sort of patriotic about the fact that I'll be memorializing the aughts well into this brave new year with a sizable debt to Bank of America. Like our great nation, I spent the last ten years getting stung and overcompensating, acting indecisive and entitled, living way beyond my means. And now I am paying. With interest! My credit card statements are so textbook "Don't" they deserve a reality show: a trip to Japan for the wedding of a couple I'd never met; $500 worth of phone calls from what was supposed to be a budget trip to the Dominican Republic; shitty new Ikea furniture to replace shitty broken Ikea furniture; more late fees than I care to add up; more liquor than I care to admit. Oh hai, it's me! The girl Suze Orman warned you about. READ MORE 5
The End of the 00s: Chains of Fools, by Maura K. Johnston @4:15 PM
When I was younger, Long Island seemed oddly resistant to chain stores, or at least the standalone types that couldn't be contained by a shopping mall. It was a big deal when, during my high-school years, the Island got its first K-Mart. Wal Mart didn't arrive in the 516 until 1995. After that, a series of big-box complexes rushed in, as did new streets to lead people inside their hulking parking structures. (I still have to swallow hard before I can give people directions that incorporate "Corporate Drive.")
It might be this weird arrested development that makes me a bit romantic over the suburban chain store. READ MORE 51
The Shadow Editors: When Did Perez Hilton Become More Famous Than Paris Hilton And Why Were We Not Informed? @3:50 PM
Letters to the Editor of Women’s Magazines, With Edith Zimmerman @4:40 PM
I just received the latest issue of SELF, and I'm looking forward to enjoying it from cover to cover! The section on how to save someone's life in an emergency, the delicious-looking recipes and the fashion suggestions I can actually afford are among the many standouts. It's the best issue I've gotten in a long time. Style and substance-that's why I subscribe! Keep up the good work.
Kerrie Smothers, St. Louis (Self, August '09)
My most recent copy of SELF fell through the slot in my door with a bang, and I screamed because I thought it was a gunshot. Nope-it was just my magazines in the mail! Anyway, the magazine itself is about a foot long, like usual, and you know what it reminds me of? A square, but a little bit longer. Can't wait to read what's in this long square!
Kendra W., Amarillo, TX READ MORE 32
Very Recent History: The French Dip @4:00 PM
In March 2003 France stated that it would not support a U.N. resolution to invade Iraq. And with that, a nation constipated with 9/11 rage found the perfect place onto which to crap. Heretofore dopey, jocular anti-France sentiment was exchanged for vitriolic, publicly expressed hatred. And yet, six years later, a hamburger demonstrates why the very fervent wrath the right has produced is nothing to worry about. READ MORE 43
Our Man In D.C.: 'The Nation' Views 'Taking Woodstock' @4:54 PM
Washingtonians were privileged Wednesday night to view a free advanced screening of the new Ang Lee film "Taking Woodstock" hosted by The Nation. Given the film's subject and the entity responsible for the promotion of this event, its safe to say that the audience which nearly filled the theatrer was the kind of people who ponder Woodstock with a whiff of mysticism. Through that misty veil of peace, love, and music, however, lies confusion and discord as to why the hell we're still talking about those three days in the August of 1969. READ MORE 6
The Shadow Editors: Five Ways Ben Affleck Interviews Nicholas Kristof and Sheryl WuDunn! @4:26 PM
Tom Scocca: OK, so my September copy of Glamour arrived the other day.
Choire Sicha: You know what I'm going to ask you, right?
Tom Scocca: Are you going to ask me why I get Glamour magazine?
Choire Sicha: Okay yes that!
Tom Scocca: According to the sheet of paper enclosed with a previous copy, I am getting Glamour magazine to make up for the cancellation of my Domino subscription. This is a fine explanation except for the fact that I never had a subscription to Domino. READ MORE 10
"Almost" "Famous": 24 Hours With Max Steele @4:52 PM
BUSHWICK—"I don't really turn people on," Max Steele said. The first time he go-go danced, someone complained to the DJ, who promptly turned off the music. This might have been because Max's go-go dancing is a disturbing sight. He tends to dance in fits and jerks, his arms stiffly at his sides except when he suddenly draws one hand up towards the side of his face. He moves around a lot when he dances, his legs following his upper body, which spasms rhythmically to a beat slightly different than that of the music.
But it isn't exactly true that he's a turn-off. READ MORE 28
