The Awl http://www.theawl.com/ Be Less Stupid Wed, 01 Jun 2011 11:05:06 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.0.2 Beach Town Wants to Ban Black Parties, As Cops Shoot People http://www.theawl.com/2011/06/beach-town-wants-to-ban-black-parties-as-cops-shoot-people http://www.theawl.com/2011/06/beach-town-wants-to-ban-black-parties-as-cops-shoot-people#comments Wed, 01 Jun 2011 11:05:06 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/06/beach-town-wants-to-ban-black-parties-as-cops-shoot-people
As we discussed last week, Miami Beach was paralyzed by fear and terror regarding the arrival of a couple hundred-thousand black people in town over Memorial Day Weekend. Well, they came, they went to Busta Rhymes' birthday party and only a few people were shot. By the police.

As near as anyone can tell, cops came up on a "stalled car" with guns out and shot up the car, claiming the driver had a gun. Twelve police officers likely shot four bystanders, definitely killed the driver and three officers were mildly injured.

They did not find a weapon in the car, however.

The police "are investigating unconfirmed reports that shots came from the car and that passengers were in the vehicle and bailed out." You know: "reports."

(The YouTube video above, while confusing, doesn't seem to show anyone "bailing out.")

Also, in a very old-school move, the police confiscated local news cameras on the scene, and grabbed and smashed a cellphone recording the incident (and also threw the cellphone's owner to the ground). They did, however, leave the car in the street until morning, quite riddled with bulletholes.

So of course today the City Council is meeting to decide what to do to keep black people from coming around.

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As we discussed last week, Miami Beach was paralyzed by fear and terror regarding the arrival of a couple hundred-thousand black people in town over Memorial Day Weekend. Well, they came, they went to Busta Rhymes' birthday party and only a few people were shot. By the police.

As near as anyone can tell, cops came up on a "stalled car" with guns out and shot up the car, claiming the driver had a gun. Twelve police officers likely shot four bystanders, definitely killed the driver and three officers were mildly injured.

They did not find a weapon in the car, however.

The police "are investigating unconfirmed reports that shots came from the car and that passengers were in the vehicle and bailed out." You know: "reports."

(The YouTube video above, while confusing, doesn't seem to show anyone "bailing out.")

Also, in a very old-school move, the police confiscated local news cameras on the scene, and grabbed and smashed a cellphone recording the incident (and also threw the cellphone's owner to the ground). They did, however, leave the car in the street until morning, quite riddled with bulletholes.

So of course today the City Council is meeting to decide what to do to keep black people from coming around.

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Small Beach Town Freaked Out by Arrival of 250,000 Black People http://www.theawl.com/2011/05/small-beach-town-freaked-out-by-arrival-of-250000-black-people http://www.theawl.com/2011/05/small-beach-town-freaked-out-by-arrival-of-250000-black-people#comments Fri, 27 May 2011 12:20:38 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/05/small-beach-town-freaked-out-by-arrival-of-250000-black-people Every year, "Urban Beach Week," in which (mostly) black people from all over the south converge on Miami Beach for fun and concerts and stuff, causes huge white anxiety. But no one's racist! "David Kelsey, president of the South Beach Hotel & Restaurant Association, says friction over the holiday weekend has been less about race than the conflict between the young party crowd and the luxury tourist clientele Miami Beach actively courts. 'There’s still a gulf between the crowd we’re attracting and the crowd we really want to attract and need for future business,' Kelsey said." He did!

Sure, who likes a bunch of partying kids? They throw up a lot, it's boring. But so "future business" is I guess... not black people, mostly. (Mostly white people prefer murderous Russian oligarchs—a much better class of character, I guess.) Except, for this weekend? "The Fontainebleau Miami Beach, where the average room starts at $389, is at least 97 percent booked." And? "The street scene has been good to Prestige Luxury Auto Rentals in Miami, which had rented out 80 percent of its stock by Tuesday, including all its $2,000-a-day Lamborghinis and even pricier Ferraris." So you know, "they" are all luxurious enough to rent the town's entire stock of $2000-a-day rental cars but not luxurious enough to be... white. (Also, I'm sorry, have none of these white people ever set foot inside a Louis Vuitton store? Who do you think made that into a bajillion-dollar business?) Anyway, fine: more room at the Young Jeezy, Raekwon and Lil Wayne parties—and the Busta Rhymes All White Yacht Party. (LOL, yes he did.)

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Every year, "Urban Beach Week," in which (mostly) black people from all over the south converge on Miami Beach for fun and concerts and stuff, causes huge white anxiety. But no one's racist! "David Kelsey, president of the South Beach Hotel & Restaurant Association, says friction over the holiday weekend has been less about race than the conflict between the young party crowd and the luxury tourist clientele Miami Beach actively courts. 'There’s still a gulf between the crowd we’re attracting and the crowd we really want to attract and need for future business,' Kelsey said." He did!

Sure, who likes a bunch of partying kids? They throw up a lot, it's boring. But so "future business" is I guess... not black people, mostly. (Mostly white people prefer murderous Russian oligarchs—a much better class of character, I guess.) Except, for this weekend? "The Fontainebleau Miami Beach, where the average room starts at $389, is at least 97 percent booked." And? "The street scene has been good to Prestige Luxury Auto Rentals in Miami, which had rented out 80 percent of its stock by Tuesday, including all its $2,000-a-day Lamborghinis and even pricier Ferraris." So you know, "they" are all luxurious enough to rent the town's entire stock of $2000-a-day rental cars but not luxurious enough to be... white. (Also, I'm sorry, have none of these white people ever set foot inside a Louis Vuitton store? Who do you think made that into a bajillion-dollar business?) Anyway, fine: more room at the Young Jeezy, Raekwon and Lil Wayne parties—and the Busta Rhymes All White Yacht Party. (LOL, yes he did.)

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Primate in Chief: A Guide to Racist Obama Monkey Photoshops http://www.theawl.com/2011/04/primate-in-chief-a-guide-to-racist-obama-monkey-photoshops http://www.theawl.com/2011/04/primate-in-chief-a-guide-to-racist-obama-monkey-photoshops#comments Tue, 19 Apr 2011 13:30:04 +0000 Abe Sauer http://www.theawl.com/2011/04/primate-in-chief-a-guide-to-racist-obama-monkey-photoshops People are outraged—outraged!—that a senior GOP official from Orange County, CA sent an email about Barack Obama that questioned his place of birth. But we've all become so numb to the "birther" conspiracies that the outrage wasn't at all about the absurdity of a party official confronting the president of the United States about some conspiracy theory. The outrage was about an attached photo, depicting Obama as an ape.

Anyone who has been on the real Internet knows that the Obama-as-ape Photoshop actually predates the mainstream talk about his birth certificate. How prevalent is it? Very. Here's a collection of artwork depicting the nation's first-ever African American president as a primate, which builds on a long history of various racist Obama caricatures.

This green t-shirt is sold as the "Obama Chimp T-Shirt" with keywords "Barack Obama, 2008, 08, jefferson's theme t-shirt, yes we did t-shirt, t-shirt, barack obama stickers, funny democrat hats, college humor republican t-shirts."

And yes, there is a "Obama Chimp Baby Onesie" version.


The primate entry in a larger gallery of Obama art.


"Chimpout" is a notorious white supremacist site with a robust collection of images like the two above, which happen to be more reserved compared to others. Of course, the "Obamas as primates apes" theme and the fundamental (and admitted) racism of the site is a coincidence.

Update: Chimpout wanted to let people know more about their site. It is...

not a white supremacist website. We accept membership from Asians, Hispanics, Anglo, Indians, Arabs, Jews etc... We have a diverse membership and even our administration multi-racial. The purpose of chimpout.com is to expose the huge disproportionate amount of black crime including rape and murder in relation to the percentage of population.

We do not allow violent rhetoric, Nazi propaganda or other white nationalist garbage on our site.

We exist only to report the huge numbers of black crimes that get swept under the carpet by the mainstream media.

We do of course have our jokes and photo-shops but they are just for amusement. We really think much too highly of apes than to seriously compare them to blacks.

So there you go.


This Planet of the Apes spoof courtesy of Stormfront, the "white pride world wide" forum which counts a good many tea party advocates among its members.


Some of the Obama-as-ape shirts get pulled from online custom apparel sites like Zazzle, but not this one.

And it was less than a year ago that Glenn Beck said, “What planet have I landed on? Did I slip through a wormhole in the middle of the night and this looks like America? It’s like the damn Planet of the Apes!"

When confronted, the Orange County GOP official insisted the image was not at all racist. There exists a rich vein on the Internet of conservative blog posts that don't seem to understand at all why comparing Barack Obama to a primate is racist, while comparing George Bush to one is not racist. This is a conversation that is still going on.

See, when Bush was president, apparently some upset person or people created a wealth of George W. Bush monkey Photoshops. The argument from many on the right here is that because of this, a hundred years of racist sentiment comparing Africans and African Americans to primates apes is negated.

And then... no, wait, that's the whole argument.

The Louvre of Obama Photoshop, The People's Cube, "proved" this reverse racism not long ago when it created identical president shirts likening Bush and Obama to a monkey. One was banned and one was not.

That the Obama one was deemed racist by CafePress and Zazzle, and the Bush one was not, proves racism regarding Obama doesn't exist and everyone who says so is a hypocrite.


A perfect example of the argument in action is the post accompanying the above "Primate in Chief" image. It's the kind of reasoning commonly employed in the online political debate, maybe best represented by Andrew Breitbart's declaration that no racism existed during the health care debate protests because there is no video of anyone using the "n" word, even after he offered a $100,000 bounty. (It's the kind of "reasoning" that nobody would accept as disproof of Jesus, but, digression.)

The Orange County GOP official's answer about why she sent the image proves just how mainstream this sentiment about the hypocrisy over "monkey" racism is: "In no way did I even consider the fact he’s half black when I sent out the email. In fact, the thought never entered my mind until one or two other people tried to make this about race. We all know a double standard applies regarding this president. "

Yes, "a double standard" about all the ignored racism against all the white politicians over all the years.

Of course, the more "sensible" conservative media is spinning this as (another) case of one bad apple serving to "reignite baseless charges that any criticism directed at the president by the right is a function of racism" and give the otherwise not-at-all racist Tea Party a bad name.

The only surprise in this news about the ape photo finding its way to Obama's inbox is that it has not already happened 10,000 times. Then again, it probably has.

For the record, homophobic emails by GOP leaders are still totally acceptable.



Abe Sauer can be reached at abesauer at gmail dot com.

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People are outraged—outraged!—that a senior GOP official from Orange County, CA sent an email about Barack Obama that questioned his place of birth. But we've all become so numb to the "birther" conspiracies that the outrage wasn't at all about the absurdity of a party official confronting the president of the United States about some conspiracy theory. The outrage was about an attached photo, depicting Obama as an ape.

Anyone who has been on the real Internet knows that the Obama-as-ape Photoshop actually predates the mainstream talk about his birth certificate. How prevalent is it? Very. Here's a collection of artwork depicting the nation's first-ever African American president as a primate, which builds on a long history of various racist Obama caricatures.

This green t-shirt is sold as the "Obama Chimp T-Shirt" with keywords "Barack Obama, 2008, 08, jefferson's theme t-shirt, yes we did t-shirt, t-shirt, barack obama stickers, funny democrat hats, college humor republican t-shirts."

And yes, there is a "Obama Chimp Baby Onesie" version.


The primate entry in a larger gallery of Obama art.


"Chimpout" is a notorious white supremacist site with a robust collection of images like the two above, which happen to be more reserved compared to others. Of course, the "Obamas as primates apes" theme and the fundamental (and admitted) racism of the site is a coincidence.

Update: Chimpout wanted to let people know more about their site. It is...

not a white supremacist website. We accept membership from Asians, Hispanics, Anglo, Indians, Arabs, Jews etc... We have a diverse membership and even our administration multi-racial. The purpose of chimpout.com is to expose the huge disproportionate amount of black crime including rape and murder in relation to the percentage of population.

We do not allow violent rhetoric, Nazi propaganda or other white nationalist garbage on our site.

We exist only to report the huge numbers of black crimes that get swept under the carpet by the mainstream media.

We do of course have our jokes and photo-shops but they are just for amusement. We really think much too highly of apes than to seriously compare them to blacks.

So there you go.


This Planet of the Apes spoof courtesy of Stormfront, the "white pride world wide" forum which counts a good many tea party advocates among its members.


Some of the Obama-as-ape shirts get pulled from online custom apparel sites like Zazzle, but not this one.

And it was less than a year ago that Glenn Beck said, “What planet have I landed on? Did I slip through a wormhole in the middle of the night and this looks like America? It’s like the damn Planet of the Apes!"

When confronted, the Orange County GOP official insisted the image was not at all racist. There exists a rich vein on the Internet of conservative blog posts that don't seem to understand at all why comparing Barack Obama to a primate is racist, while comparing George Bush to one is not racist. This is a conversation that is still going on.

See, when Bush was president, apparently some upset person or people created a wealth of George W. Bush monkey Photoshops. The argument from many on the right here is that because of this, a hundred years of racist sentiment comparing Africans and African Americans to primates apes is negated.

And then... no, wait, that's the whole argument.

The Louvre of Obama Photoshop, The People's Cube, "proved" this reverse racism not long ago when it created identical president shirts likening Bush and Obama to a monkey. One was banned and one was not.

That the Obama one was deemed racist by CafePress and Zazzle, and the Bush one was not, proves racism regarding Obama doesn't exist and everyone who says so is a hypocrite.


A perfect example of the argument in action is the post accompanying the above "Primate in Chief" image. It's the kind of reasoning commonly employed in the online political debate, maybe best represented by Andrew Breitbart's declaration that no racism existed during the health care debate protests because there is no video of anyone using the "n" word, even after he offered a $100,000 bounty. (It's the kind of "reasoning" that nobody would accept as disproof of Jesus, but, digression.)

The Orange County GOP official's answer about why she sent the image proves just how mainstream this sentiment about the hypocrisy over "monkey" racism is: "In no way did I even consider the fact he’s half black when I sent out the email. In fact, the thought never entered my mind until one or two other people tried to make this about race. We all know a double standard applies regarding this president. "

Yes, "a double standard" about all the ignored racism against all the white politicians over all the years.

Of course, the more "sensible" conservative media is spinning this as (another) case of one bad apple serving to "reignite baseless charges that any criticism directed at the president by the right is a function of racism" and give the otherwise not-at-all racist Tea Party a bad name.

The only surprise in this news about the ape photo finding its way to Obama's inbox is that it has not already happened 10,000 times. Then again, it probably has.

For the record, homophobic emails by GOP leaders are still totally acceptable.



Abe Sauer can be reached at abesauer at gmail dot com.

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Annoying Jews and/or Asians Disturb Fashion Genius http://www.theawl.com/2011/02/annoying-jews-andor-asians-disturb-fashion-genius http://www.theawl.com/2011/02/annoying-jews-andor-asians-disturb-fashion-genius#comments Fri, 25 Feb 2011 11:40:21 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2011/02/annoying-jews-andor-asians-disturb-fashion-genius There are conflicting accounts of the incident that IS ROCKING PARIS and MY WORLD right now, in which Dior's John Galliano tussled with a lady with an ugly handbag and her Jewish and/or Asian friend. (Some reports say he said "anti-Semitic things" (though no one will say what!) and other reports say he called them "Asian." Youch, harsh language, I guess?) The police arrived, and he was released this morning. How could ugly people in Paris get in the way of the designer of Dior? I hope they're happy that he's been "suspended" from his job. I smell a plot, as in, there's always someone younger coming down the stairs who'll get ugly Jewish and/or Asian people to get you in trouble.

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There are conflicting accounts of the incident that IS ROCKING PARIS and MY WORLD right now, in which Dior's John Galliano tussled with a lady with an ugly handbag and her Jewish and/or Asian friend. (Some reports say he said "anti-Semitic things" (though no one will say what!) and other reports say he called them "Asian." Youch, harsh language, I guess?) The police arrived, and he was released this morning. How could ugly people in Paris get in the way of the designer of Dior? I hope they're happy that he's been "suspended" from his job. I smell a plot, as in, there's always someone younger coming down the stairs who'll get ugly Jewish and/or Asian people to get you in trouble.

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Presence of Immigrants Still Correlates With Low Crime! http://www.theawl.com/2010/06/presence-of-immigrants-still-correlates-with-low-crime http://www.theawl.com/2010/06/presence-of-immigrants-still-correlates-with-low-crime#comments Tue, 15 Jun 2010 11:07:42 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/06/presence-of-immigrants-still-correlates-with-low-crime YA KNOW?It's pretty amazing that no matter how many times people point this out, no matter how many times local police say that Arizona's new immigration law is bad for them, apparently no one can hear it. The murder rate in a number of border towns-including San Diego, El Paso and Tuscon (which is not really a border town in the same way El Paso is)-actually dropped significantly from 2008 to 2009. In fact, El Paso and San Diego both made the most-recent top five list of large American cities with low violent crime rates. If you really crunch some numbers, you find that the states with the most "illegal immigrants" actually have the lowest per capita incidences of violent crime. (Now Philly: that's a place you don't want to be.) Even when you look at a longer time period than year-over-year, you see that Arizona has 15% less violent crime overall since 2006. This makes the insane ramblings of anti-immigration folks all the more annoying-especially because most of them are probably Irish people whose parents came here and took a job away from some real white person.

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YA KNOW?It's pretty amazing that no matter how many times people point this out, no matter how many times local police say that Arizona's new immigration law is bad for them, apparently no one can hear it. The murder rate in a number of border towns-including San Diego, El Paso and Tuscon (which is not really a border town in the same way El Paso is)-actually dropped significantly from 2008 to 2009. In fact, El Paso and San Diego both made the most-recent top five list of large American cities with low violent crime rates. If you really crunch some numbers, you find that the states with the most "illegal immigrants" actually have the lowest per capita incidences of violent crime. (Now Philly: that's a place you don't want to be.) Even when you look at a longer time period than year-over-year, you see that Arizona has 15% less violent crime overall since 2006. This makes the insane ramblings of anti-immigration folks all the more annoying-especially because most of them are probably Irish people whose parents came here and took a job away from some real white person.

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Murderous Mexico Mortifies Migrants! http://www.theawl.com/2010/03/murderous-mexico-mortifies-migrants http://www.theawl.com/2010/03/murderous-mexico-mortifies-migrants#comments Fri, 19 Mar 2010 12:40:52 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/03/murderous-mexico-mortifies-migrants MURDERER?"There was a donkey painted like a zebra, hitched to a cart full of sombreros, a Tijuana photo opportunity. But no smiling tourists stepped into the picture frame." Ha ha. Wait, really? 18,000 murders in three years and now Tijuana is empty? But... but... but the U.S. had 17,000 murders in 2006 alone! The murder rate per population in Mexico isn't even double ours. But. WHY was the donkey painted like a zebra though??? I don't get it.

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MURDERER?"There was a donkey painted like a zebra, hitched to a cart full of sombreros, a Tijuana photo opportunity. But no smiling tourists stepped into the picture frame." Ha ha. Wait, really? 18,000 murders in three years and now Tijuana is empty? But... but... but the U.S. had 17,000 murders in 2006 alone! The murder rate per population in Mexico isn't even double ours. But. WHY was the donkey painted like a zebra though??? I don't get it.

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50 Years Ago Today: 'Time' Mag's "Population Explosion"! http://www.theawl.com/2010/01/50-years-ago-today-time-mags-population-explosion http://www.theawl.com/2010/01/50-years-ago-today-time-mags-population-explosion#comments Mon, 11 Jan 2010 16:10:57 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2010/01/50-years-ago-today-time-mags-population-explosion TIME!
Pretty amazing, right? Inside the issue: an excellent dishy gossip report from Hollywood headlined Moses and the Money Changers (yikes) and this actually very spectacular report on Ray Ryan's Mount Kenya Safari Club. (Ray Ryan, you will remember, blew up in a pretty spectacular unsolved car-bombing in 1977.) Simpler times! Sort of!

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TIME!
Pretty amazing, right? Inside the issue: an excellent dishy gossip report from Hollywood headlined Moses and the Money Changers (yikes) and this actually very spectacular report on Ray Ryan's Mount Kenya Safari Club. (Ray Ryan, you will remember, blew up in a pretty spectacular unsolved car-bombing in 1977.) Simpler times! Sort of!

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Real America with Abe Sauer: New York is Also Racist http://www.theawl.com/2009/10/real-america-with-abe-sauer-new-york-is-also-racist http://www.theawl.com/2009/10/real-america-with-abe-sauer-new-york-is-also-racist#comments Wed, 28 Oct 2009 16:25:18 +0000 Abe Sauer http://www.theawl.com/2009/10/real-america-with-abe-sauer-new-york-is-also-racist manhattan-halloween-inian
During a recent visit to New York City to, amongst other things, check out this Manhattan JC Penney location everyone is talking about (more on that next week!), I did a little Halloween costume shopping at the New York Costumes superstore on 11th street and Broadway. And keeping with the recent theme of Halloween costumes for racists and bigots (and their dogs), I found the perfect costume: Chief Culturally Insensitive.

halloween-indian-2But look, it's all fine because he's just helping shoppers identify the section with the store's robust offering of Halloween costumes for people who want to dress as Sexy Indian Girl or Super Mohawk, or who want their children to learn more about American Indian culture.

As a non-New Yorker who often finds his place of residence on the business end of East Coast liberal scorn, it's almost satisfying to know that Manhattanites are also clueless. Almost.

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manhattan-halloween-inian
During a recent visit to New York City to, amongst other things, check out this Manhattan JC Penney location everyone is talking about (more on that next week!), I did a little Halloween costume shopping at the New York Costumes superstore on 11th street and Broadway. And keeping with the recent theme of Halloween costumes for racists and bigots (and their dogs), I found the perfect costume: Chief Culturally Insensitive.

halloween-indian-2But look, it's all fine because he's just helping shoppers identify the section with the store's robust offering of Halloween costumes for people who want to dress as Sexy Indian Girl or Super Mohawk, or who want their children to learn more about American Indian culture.

As a non-New Yorker who often finds his place of residence on the business end of East Coast liberal scorn, it's almost satisfying to know that Manhattanites are also clueless. Almost.

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Very Recent History: The French Dip http://www.theawl.com/2009/09/very-recent-history-the-french-dip http://www.theawl.com/2009/09/very-recent-history-the-french-dip#comments Thu, 03 Sep 2009 16:00:57 +0000 Abe Sauer http://www.theawl.com/2009/09/very-recent-history-the-french-dip Kerry ObamaIn March 2003 France stated that it would not support a U.N. resolution to invade Iraq. And with that, a nation constipated with 9/11 rage found the perfect place onto which to crap. Heretofore dopey, jocular anti-France sentiment was exchanged for vitriolic, publicly expressed hatred. And yet, six years later, a hamburger demonstrates why the very fervent wrath the right has produced is nothing to worry about.

We invaded Iraq anyway; but that didn't stop the Francophobia. In the ensuing 2004 election, when a Bush adviser told the New York Times that John Kerry "looks French," other media ran with it, shamefully giving it legs and maybe even costing the "surprisingly lifelike" John Kerry an election. James Taranto, of The Wall Street Journal, pounded away on this French connection throughout the election. Limbaugh of course also locked on, referring to Kerry as "French-looking" and "Jean Cheri" Tom DeLay (R-HELL) started speeches saying, "Good afternoon, or, as John Kerry might say, Bonjour." Commerce Secretary Don Evans called Kerry a "fellow of a different political stripe who looks French." There were many more, including Sun Times writer Mark Steyn calling Kerry "America's first French president."

The height of this stupidity came in the form of food wars. In March 2003, all references to French fries and French toast on the menus of the House of Representatives restaurants were removed and replaced with "freedom." Representatives Robert W. Ney (R-Ohio) said at the time, "This action today is a small but symbolic effort to show the strong displeasure many on Capitol Hill have with our so-called ally, France." (Ney would later make a less small effort by taking money from unquestionable ally Jack Abramoff.) The House menu did not revert to offering "French" fries and toast until 2006.

Fudruckers fine dining and the less-fine eating establishment called The United States Air Force both removed "French" as a descriptor of their fries and toast. There were, and are, many websites.

"Iraq first, France next!" and "First Iraq, then Chirac!" were a couple bumper stickers available to express one's opinion on the subject.

Bumpers, Then and Now

Less notable historical documents of the period that played on anti-France sentiment were films such as SWAT, which featured a murderous French gangster as the main bad guy, and Ocean's Twelve and Catwoman, both of which also featured French baddies.

This Francophobia went so far that French's mustard, concerned about flagging sales, was forced to put out an official statement clarifying that its brand came from a family name, not, yuck, from France.

The point is that none of these ridiculous France references would have been possible if a large segment of America was not somehow convinced that the French were indeed goons and against our interests. The Gallup Poll: Public Opinion 2004 noted of the American public's sentiment: "The favorable image of France nose-dived from 79% in February 2002 to 59% in February 2003, and all the way down to 34% in March of that same year..."

Cut to today, five years on, and Hardee's, one of the nation's largest, most popular purveys of food-like substances, has launched its latest contribution to American obesity: The French Dip.

DIP IT REAL GOOD

The very demographic that often eats at Hardee's is likely very similar to the lobotomized demographic that fed on, and fueled, the Francophobia of a half decade ago.

Hardee's is even running ads featuring French maids and French kissing with the tagline "It's better when it's French." There is even a Hardee's "French Me" website. And a campaign.

A Hardee's street team will "French-ify Hardee's Fans in 11 US cities:" From the (just shocking) press release [all very sic]:

"What do maids, toast, kisses and burgers all have in common? They're all better when they're French," said Brad Haley, Hardee's Executive Vice President of Marketing... "We Mesdemoiselles cannot wait to pull on our stockings and get a little dirty," said Isabelle, Hardee's French Maid Captain. "Zere are hungry messieurs all over zee country and we are going to French zem all with Hardee's new crème de la crème of burgers...the French Dip Thickburger!"

FRENCH DIPPING SAUCES

Nothing at a massive national chain like Hardee's happens because a couple guys in a room decide "what the hell." There are market surveys and testing and consumer research and branding, all looking for the new product sweet spot. That means that some giant New York firm put on their hazmat suits and went out to The People and tested names like "The Man Monster," "Au Jus Delight", "The Hamminator," and "The French Dip," and that these results pointed to a market that most favored "French Dip." This means that just five-odd years after people were whipped into a froth enough to support a move by their elected officials to rename the French fry and shun a presidential candidate over even the suggestion he might "look French," they are willing to pay $4 for a bunch of heated meatish matter on a bleached-white bun named a French Dip.

Jenna Petroff, a very nice public relations manager for Hardee's Food Systems, Inc. filled me in on the French Dip: "We didn't have any concern about anti-French sentiment before and we haven't seen any responses now that the ad campaign has launched to indicate otherwise, In fact, our street team, the French Femmes (four beautiful French Maids on segways) are now in their second month of touring various markets throughout the Midwest and Southeast. They've been very well received, attending sporting events, concerts and other public venues, passing out French Dip Thickburger coupons and taking pics with their fans. You can see more on the tour at www.frenchdiptour.com."

So assuming a PR rep would never lie to me, this means that Hardee's reps, less than six years after a Las Vegas talk radio station held an anti-France public crushing of French products and a Pennsylvania rep and 40-plus co-sponsors introduced House Resolution 119, prohibiting state-sponsored liquor stores from buying French wine, and Las Vegas' Paris (!) hotel and casino removed all its French flags, Hardee's said: "Yeah, French! That's a great idea!"

In a follow up, Jenna told me that, while the company doesn't release numbers, it is "very pleased" with French Dip sales so far.

And in the event she is covering something up (which I doubt), and Hardee's worried themselves silly about how "French" would be received, going so far as to run $10 million worth of market tests, so what? The ultimate result is the same and it's that the thing exists at all and is being widely purchased.

And for the current hullabaloo, that's a good thing. A look at the current health care fearmongering and misinformation campaign reveals a lot of the same players. For (perennial) example, there is Bill O'Reilly. During the anti-France thing, O'Reilly called for a "boycott of France," which, besides not making any sense as one cannot boycott a geographic entity, included bumper stickers and regular O'Reilly segments lying about how much economic damage his viewers were doing. He fanned flames of what was genuine nationwide hatred.

It wasn't until 2007 that the pundit lifted his boycott; though his "boycott France" bumper stickers remained available because "you never know, we may have to re-impose it." Surprise then that Bill is now on about "death panels" and generally encouraging the loons that are turning town halls into gun shows and circuses.

We Pee On You

Mr. DeLay, he of the "Bonjour" slur, is fanning the white-hot LCD-flames of the current outrage by making up fairy tales about "quadriplegics on gurneys" being "dumped on the floor in front of my podium."

And how about The Wall Street Journal's James Taranto? Oh here he is: "...the country's culture of freedom [is] deep-seated enough, to thwart any authoritarian impulses Obama and his men may have." (Also, James seems to not have given up on the French thing even though the rest of America has; on Aug. 19 he wrote "...John Kerry, the haughty, French-looking Massachusetts Democrat, who by the way served in Vietnam.")

Our Cars Tell You Off!

So America has again shown itself to be a toadying zombie mob with a terrible memory. We quite simply cannot remember what we loved or hated ten minutes ago. Some have worried of late about how the current town-hall-attending anti-socialism "water-the-tree" lunatic fringe is boiling up to "do something." But recent experience, in this case, most likely does indicate future performance. That is to say, it all ads up to cable news theatre and a surplus of embarrassing bumper stickers. Five years from now, the hot Christmas toy will be the new Socialism Elmo. Today's manufactured "socialism" scare is yesterday's anti-France zealotry. And the next outrage is anyone's guess. But we can be sure it will have an expiration date.

By the way, the French Dip thing is delicious.


Previously: The Last of the Hot Summer Town Halls: How We've All Been Fooled by the Health Care Debate

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Kerry ObamaIn March 2003 France stated that it would not support a U.N. resolution to invade Iraq. And with that, a nation constipated with 9/11 rage found the perfect place onto which to crap. Heretofore dopey, jocular anti-France sentiment was exchanged for vitriolic, publicly expressed hatred. And yet, six years later, a hamburger demonstrates why the very fervent wrath the right has produced is nothing to worry about.

We invaded Iraq anyway; but that didn't stop the Francophobia. In the ensuing 2004 election, when a Bush adviser told the New York Times that John Kerry "looks French," other media ran with it, shamefully giving it legs and maybe even costing the "surprisingly lifelike" John Kerry an election. James Taranto, of The Wall Street Journal, pounded away on this French connection throughout the election. Limbaugh of course also locked on, referring to Kerry as "French-looking" and "Jean Cheri" Tom DeLay (R-HELL) started speeches saying, "Good afternoon, or, as John Kerry might say, Bonjour." Commerce Secretary Don Evans called Kerry a "fellow of a different political stripe who looks French." There were many more, including Sun Times writer Mark Steyn calling Kerry "America's first French president."

The height of this stupidity came in the form of food wars. In March 2003, all references to French fries and French toast on the menus of the House of Representatives restaurants were removed and replaced with "freedom." Representatives Robert W. Ney (R-Ohio) said at the time, "This action today is a small but symbolic effort to show the strong displeasure many on Capitol Hill have with our so-called ally, France." (Ney would later make a less small effort by taking money from unquestionable ally Jack Abramoff.) The House menu did not revert to offering "French" fries and toast until 2006.

Fudruckers fine dining and the less-fine eating establishment called The United States Air Force both removed "French" as a descriptor of their fries and toast. There were, and are, many websites.

"Iraq first, France next!" and "First Iraq, then Chirac!" were a couple bumper stickers available to express one's opinion on the subject.

Bumpers, Then and Now

Less notable historical documents of the period that played on anti-France sentiment were films such as SWAT, which featured a murderous French gangster as the main bad guy, and Ocean's Twelve and Catwoman, both of which also featured French baddies.

This Francophobia went so far that French's mustard, concerned about flagging sales, was forced to put out an official statement clarifying that its brand came from a family name, not, yuck, from France.

The point is that none of these ridiculous France references would have been possible if a large segment of America was not somehow convinced that the French were indeed goons and against our interests. The Gallup Poll: Public Opinion 2004 noted of the American public's sentiment: "The favorable image of France nose-dived from 79% in February 2002 to 59% in February 2003, and all the way down to 34% in March of that same year..."

Cut to today, five years on, and Hardee's, one of the nation's largest, most popular purveys of food-like substances, has launched its latest contribution to American obesity: The French Dip.

DIP IT REAL GOOD

The very demographic that often eats at Hardee's is likely very similar to the lobotomized demographic that fed on, and fueled, the Francophobia of a half decade ago.

Hardee's is even running ads featuring French maids and French kissing with the tagline "It's better when it's French." There is even a Hardee's "French Me" website. And a campaign.

A Hardee's street team will "French-ify Hardee's Fans in 11 US cities:" From the (just shocking) press release [all very sic]:

"What do maids, toast, kisses and burgers all have in common? They're all better when they're French," said Brad Haley, Hardee's Executive Vice President of Marketing... "We Mesdemoiselles cannot wait to pull on our stockings and get a little dirty," said Isabelle, Hardee's French Maid Captain. "Zere are hungry messieurs all over zee country and we are going to French zem all with Hardee's new crème de la crème of burgers...the French Dip Thickburger!"

FRENCH DIPPING SAUCES

Nothing at a massive national chain like Hardee's happens because a couple guys in a room decide "what the hell." There are market surveys and testing and consumer research and branding, all looking for the new product sweet spot. That means that some giant New York firm put on their hazmat suits and went out to The People and tested names like "The Man Monster," "Au Jus Delight", "The Hamminator," and "The French Dip," and that these results pointed to a market that most favored "French Dip." This means that just five-odd years after people were whipped into a froth enough to support a move by their elected officials to rename the French fry and shun a presidential candidate over even the suggestion he might "look French," they are willing to pay $4 for a bunch of heated meatish matter on a bleached-white bun named a French Dip.

Jenna Petroff, a very nice public relations manager for Hardee's Food Systems, Inc. filled me in on the French Dip: "We didn't have any concern about anti-French sentiment before and we haven't seen any responses now that the ad campaign has launched to indicate otherwise, In fact, our street team, the French Femmes (four beautiful French Maids on segways) are now in their second month of touring various markets throughout the Midwest and Southeast. They've been very well received, attending sporting events, concerts and other public venues, passing out French Dip Thickburger coupons and taking pics with their fans. You can see more on the tour at www.frenchdiptour.com."

So assuming a PR rep would never lie to me, this means that Hardee's reps, less than six years after a Las Vegas talk radio station held an anti-France public crushing of French products and a Pennsylvania rep and 40-plus co-sponsors introduced House Resolution 119, prohibiting state-sponsored liquor stores from buying French wine, and Las Vegas' Paris (!) hotel and casino removed all its French flags, Hardee's said: "Yeah, French! That's a great idea!"

In a follow up, Jenna told me that, while the company doesn't release numbers, it is "very pleased" with French Dip sales so far.

And in the event she is covering something up (which I doubt), and Hardee's worried themselves silly about how "French" would be received, going so far as to run $10 million worth of market tests, so what? The ultimate result is the same and it's that the thing exists at all and is being widely purchased.

And for the current hullabaloo, that's a good thing. A look at the current health care fearmongering and misinformation campaign reveals a lot of the same players. For (perennial) example, there is Bill O'Reilly. During the anti-France thing, O'Reilly called for a "boycott of France," which, besides not making any sense as one cannot boycott a geographic entity, included bumper stickers and regular O'Reilly segments lying about how much economic damage his viewers were doing. He fanned flames of what was genuine nationwide hatred.

It wasn't until 2007 that the pundit lifted his boycott; though his "boycott France" bumper stickers remained available because "you never know, we may have to re-impose it." Surprise then that Bill is now on about "death panels" and generally encouraging the loons that are turning town halls into gun shows and circuses.

We Pee On You

Mr. DeLay, he of the "Bonjour" slur, is fanning the white-hot LCD-flames of the current outrage by making up fairy tales about "quadriplegics on gurneys" being "dumped on the floor in front of my podium."

And how about The Wall Street Journal's James Taranto? Oh here he is: "...the country's culture of freedom [is] deep-seated enough, to thwart any authoritarian impulses Obama and his men may have." (Also, James seems to not have given up on the French thing even though the rest of America has; on Aug. 19 he wrote "...John Kerry, the haughty, French-looking Massachusetts Democrat, who by the way served in Vietnam.")

Our Cars Tell You Off!

So America has again shown itself to be a toadying zombie mob with a terrible memory. We quite simply cannot remember what we loved or hated ten minutes ago. Some have worried of late about how the current town-hall-attending anti-socialism "water-the-tree" lunatic fringe is boiling up to "do something." But recent experience, in this case, most likely does indicate future performance. That is to say, it all ads up to cable news theatre and a surplus of embarrassing bumper stickers. Five years from now, the hot Christmas toy will be the new Socialism Elmo. Today's manufactured "socialism" scare is yesterday's anti-France zealotry. And the next outrage is anyone's guess. But we can be sure it will have an expiration date.

By the way, the French Dip thing is delicious.


Previously: The Last of the Hot Summer Town Halls: How We've All Been Fooled by the Health Care Debate

---

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43 comments

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Craigslist's Most Notable Male Slaves of August http://www.theawl.com/2009/09/craigslists-most-notable-male-slaves-of-august http://www.theawl.com/2009/09/craigslists-most-notable-male-slaves-of-august#comments Tue, 01 Sep 2009 15:50:05 +0000 Choire Sicha http://www.theawl.com/2009/09/craigslists-most-notable-male-slaves-of-august OH BOYFormerly renowned author Dennis Cooper-and do I need to tell you this link isn't really safe for work?-rounds up "August 2009's notable international male slaves under 30 in their own words and, perhaps, pictures," from, we're just guessing here, Craigslist. It is disturbing in like 22 ways, if you can still be disturbed. The most amusing (OR IS IT?) one follows. (What language do you use here: "my favorite"? Ew.)

SingleWhiteFootmat, 18
I'm looking to meet guys interested in wiping their feet (boots, socks, bare) all over my face.

Initially it'd be hot if they treated me like dirt (disregarding me almost while i do their feet) but eventually would like good conversation. ;-)

Sorry, not into asians.

The poor Asians.

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OH BOYFormerly renowned author Dennis Cooper-and do I need to tell you this link isn't really safe for work?-rounds up "August 2009's notable international male slaves under 30 in their own words and, perhaps, pictures," from, we're just guessing here, Craigslist. It is disturbing in like 22 ways, if you can still be disturbed. The most amusing (OR IS IT?) one follows. (What language do you use here: "my favorite"? Ew.)

SingleWhiteFootmat, 18
I'm looking to meet guys interested in wiping their feet (boots, socks, bare) all over my face.

Initially it'd be hot if they treated me like dirt (disregarding me almost while i do their feet) but eventually would like good conversation. ;-)

Sorry, not into asians.

The poor Asians.

---

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14 comments

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