"Rumors have been circulating on the Internet that beavers’ anal secretions have the scent and taste of vanilla. Earlier this week, the Swedish National Food Agency confirmed that, saying that anal secretions that beavers use to mark their territory, called castoreum, can be used for vanilla flavoring in baked goods, chewing gum, pudding, etc."
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Okay, fine, I tried to ignore this the first time around because it seemed a little too easy even to me, but apparently the universe wants me to share the story of the RABID BEAVER EPIDEMIC in Northern Virginia. If you can watch the video above without snickering, congratulations: You have passed middle-school maturity level. Anyway, I bet every time they see another one of these stories, Bill Wasik and Monica Murphy have to think, "Cha-ching!" just a little. And can you blame them?
World's Largest Beaver Dam Is So Big You Can See It From Space (Just Like That Car Parked On My Block)
Have you heard about the giant beaver dam that was recently discovered in a national park in Canada? The beavers have been working on it since the 1970s. It's 28,000 feet long (that's more than twice the length of the Hoover Dam.) And, as everyone keeps reporting, it is visible from space. But so what? You can see everything from space now. (Or at least, the Pennsylvania state revenue service can. Yikes!) In fact, I'm using the same kind of technology that Canadian ecologist Jean Thie used to discover the dam to look at a red car parked outside my apartment as I type this. Looks [...]
"The fisherman wanted his photo shot with a beaver. The beaver had other ideas: It attacked the 60-year-old man with razor-sharp teeth, slicing an artery and causing him to bleed to death."
Every day, humans kill millions of animals. We kill them in the hideous industrial slaughterhouses, we kill them with our F-350s barreling down the county road, we kill them with gigantic fish-harvesting scrapers dragged along the ocean floor, we kill them at the "Humane Society," and we kill them when they've made the critical mistake of surfacing near our ugly houses. But it is only News when an "unlikely" animal finally has enough of this constant holocaust and decides to "kill back" a human.
Today's example comes from Belarus, a place we rarely hear about despite its romantic name meaning "White Russia." It was here, reportedly, that a large beaver [...]
Controversy is flaring in the Oderbruch region in the German state of Brandenburg, because a thriving beaver population there has been digging into the dikes along the Oder river, weakening the levee and threatening the 20,000 human residents of the marshy area with flooding.