And That's When I Clicked "Close Tab": Ill-Fated Lady Gaga Goes Time-Traveling @10:20 AM
"If Gaga is to maintain her distinctiveness, she'll need to preserve her orientation toward art as kids putting on a show. It's what connects her performance of fame to Andy Warhol's vision instead of Simon Cowell's. She's been derided for constantly citing the Pop pioneer, but the connection is real. Having gotten her start in the bohemian enclaves of downtown New York City—"
Um, listen up, Ann Powers. Lady Gaga is a number of interesting things, but a time traveler to New York City's long-gone history she is not. We imagine she knows some amazing things! But probably not enough physics to construct a time machine back to 1985. 22
And That's When I Clicked "Close Tab": 9/11 Poetry Edition @2:30 PM
"Smoke billows rolled
As planes shattered glass
Concrete and steel
The trees and the grass
An enemy attack
On the Land of the Free
How could this happen
How could this be"
Amazingly, there are nine more verses to this, but this was about as far as I could go. 13
And That's When I Clicked "Close Tab": David Denby on "Inglourious Basterds†@9:00 AM
I was page-downing really fast, hitting the space bar as soon as I read maybe 1/3 of a sentence, because I didn't even really care what David Denby unfortunately happened to scrawl in the New Yorker about the new Quentin Tarantino, and then I came across part of two consecutive phrases: "appallingly insensitive-a Louisville Slugger" and then I closed the window, because, what is this, 1998? YOU MEAN THERE IS VIOLENCE IN THIS TARANTINO FILM? Perhaps my criticism is incorrect, however, I shall never know. 4
And That's When I Clicked "Close Tab": Arguments In Favor Of The Ivy League Edition @9:07 AM
"A kind of middlebrow 'Simpsons' written by public university grads rather than the Harvard elite, 'The Family Guy' prides itself on pushing the envelope of good taste whenever possible." 17
And That's When I Clicked "Close Tab": Reasons For Flackery Edition @1:00 PM
"Face it: you went into PR because you wanted to be a superstar."
I am kidding! This is actually pretty good! Do not click "close tab." 5
And That's When I Clicked "Close Tab": Starbucks Efficiency Expert Edition @9:25 AM
Starbucks is getting some assistance in its attempt to streamline processes: "To help her understand how work can be done more efficiently, Kim Landreth, a member of the lean team, brought a Mr. Potato Head to Ms. Jordan's store and sprinkled the ears, nose, lips and other accessories across several tables. Using a stop watch, Ms. Landreth timed how long it took Ms. Jordan to assemble the toy and place it in its box. It took more than a minute. Ms. Landreth asked her to think about how she could complete the task faster. Moving items closer together shaved time, as did altering the order of assembly. Over two hours, Ms. Jordan amended the task. Her final time: about 16 seconds. 'That really opened my eyes,' she says." 8
And That's When I Clicked "Close Tab": Harry Potter Edition @12:20 PM
"This is the same week where the American people have been treated to the unseemly spectacle of conservative politicians using 'racism' as a club to beat up Judge Sonia Sotomayor, the first Hispanic American woman nominated to the United States Supreme Court. These attacks on her, as illustrated but not limited to Senator Sessions' remarks, illustrate that her questioners have no insight into their own racial formation, and deformation, in a white-dominant American society.
I highly recommend that several of these Senators go see the Harry Potter film–and better yet, read the books where the racial prejudice by some in the wizarding community is horribly illustrated." 11
