The Naming of Things
9

Long Island "Death Yacht" Only Technically a Yacht

Yesterday they raised the "Kandi Won," which is the "DEATH YACHT" (as per the Post) that sunk on the 4th of July, on Long Island, killing three children. It's not really germane to that tragedy, but when the tabloids went wild over "Long Island Yacht Disaster" and the like, I most certainly was not picturing this wee 34-foot Silverton. (On which I would no sooner board 27 people than I would try to land a helicopter on it.) Anyway, terrible story, very sad, and I blame the media.

2

Let's Start Calling Gwyneth Paltrow "Goop" All The Time

I very much enjoyed Bethlehem Shoals referring to Gwyneth Paltrow as "Goop" in the second sentence of his piece about Country Strong and Townes Van Zandt on Friday. I would like it if the nickname stuck. For a few reasons, I guess, but mostly because Goop is also the name of a character on my six-year-old kid's favorite television show, "Ben 10 Alien Force."

15

Neologisms for "Finally Not Being Last in Line"

Is there a name for the psychological cozy feeling when you're finally not the last person in a long line?

— Choire Sicha (@Choire) June 22, 2012

In the interminable Stumptown morning line that spills into the lobby of the Ace Hotel every day (LOL, I know, but it's the only place for good coffee drinks by our office), I was last in line for a while and then this friendly fox sidled up behind me and was like "Aren't you thrilled that you're not the last last in line anymore?" I was! There ought to be a word for that, we agreed. Part of it is [...]

10

Something Something, A Joke about Ed Koch and Queens

“'If Mayor Bloomberg wants to name something, he can name Bloomberg L.P. Koch L.P.,'” said Councilman Jumaane D. Williams of Brooklyn, referring to the mayor’s media conglomerate." —Some people really don't want the Queensboro Bridge renamed for Ed Koch. It's a fair point that the Brooklyn Bridge wouldn't get renamed for a Mayor, certainly not a living one—but then the Queensboro Bridge isn't exactly the Brooklyn Bridge now, is it? In other news, maybe by noon we'll come up with the right joke about Koch and Queens.