The Ideas Issue
9

Let's Make the Sequester the SEA QUESTER!

So this fiscal cliff thing, whatever it is, seems pretty bad. Or maybe it's not that big a deal? Will it last forever? Is it "in the Constitution" or just a Politico scam? Is it Obama's fault, or are liberals to blame? The problem is that sequester is jargon garbage that means nothing to anyone outside of newsrooms and the U.S. Capitol, which should just have iron bars put in all the windows and doorways and be renamed Ronald Reagan Federal Penitentiary.

What's happening is nothing less than a partial-birth shutdown of the United States. It is the fault of Tea Party Kochbats in Congress who are, if I'm reading [...]

0

8 Ideas That Will Fix Everything (Sandy, Etc.)

Did you get your Hurricane Sandy mementos yet? A whimsical "I survived Hurricane Sandy" mousepad is one of many excellent ideas floating around, post-storm, and we have gathered a few others you might want to implement immediately:

  1. Marathon contestants are welcome, but during the run they must wear BabyBjörns filled with supplies to be delivered door-to-door along the route.
  2. Outlawed giant soda cups can be used to scoop dead baby rats from your drinking water.