America's Deeply Incorrect New Nut Ranking

4552687610_6199a19420_z“In 2012 Americans ate more almonds per capita than shelled and unshelled snack peanuts combined (not including peanut butter).” Almonds are great—especially in milk form—but what the fuck is wrong with you America?

Nuts, properly ranked (updated for 2014):

11. pine nuts
10. regular walnuts
9. hazelnuts
8. pecans
7. cashews
6. almonds
5. brazil nuts
4. macadamia nuts
3. peanuts
2. black walnuts
1. pistachios

But I suppose this new development does reflect, in its way, our particularly American way of privileging mediocrity, and who can fault, like, American values?

Photo by Shelby Root