Tuesday, February 25th, 2014
4

You Won't Believe The Latest Stupid Trend Out Of Brooklyn

beardofbees"The thick, flowing beards adorning hipsters from Williamsburg to Park Slope are driving follicly-challenged New Yorkers to a little-known but growing field of plastic surgery — facial hair transplants…. [Plastic surgeon Yael Halaas] said an increasing number of 'hip' and 'fashionable' young professionals in their 20s and 30s are seeking the procedure. 'I get a lot of detail-oriented people — artists, architects,' the doctor said, noting that beard-centric neighborhoods such as Williamsburg, Bushwick and Park Slope have each delivered four to five clients to her practice in the past year."

4 Comments / Post A Comment

Matthew Phelan (#10,133)

Once more, Democritus, arise on Earth,
With chearful Wisdom and instructive Mirth,
See motley Life in modern Trappings dress'd,
And feed with varied Fools th' eternal Jest:
Thou who couldst laugh where Want enchain'd Caprice,
Toil crush'd Conceit, and Man was of a Piece;
Where Wealth unlov'd without a Mourner dy'd;
And scarce a Sycophant was fed by Pride;
Where ne'er was known the Form of mock Debate,
Or seen a new-made Mayor's unwieldy State;
Where change of Fav'rites made no Change of Laws,
And Senates heard before they judg'd a Cause;
How wouldst thou shake at Brooklyn's modish Tribe,
Dart the quick Taunt, and edge the piercing Gibe?
Attentive Truth and Nature to descry,
And pierce each Scene with Philosophic Eye.
To thee were solemn Toys or empty Shew,
The Robes of Pleasure and the Veils of Woe:
All aid the Farce, and all thy Mirth maintain,
Whose Joys are causeless, or whose Griefs are vain.

Such was the Scorn that fill'd the Sage's Mind,
Renew'd at ev'ry Glance on Hipsterkind;
How just that Scorn ere yet thy Voice declare,
Search every State, and canvass ev'ry Pray'r.

Matthew Phelan (#10,133)

(Also, this news item makes me want to die.)

whizz_dumb (#10,650)

I haven't shaved my face with a razor in years. This makes me want to. Wait, only 4 idiots in the last year? Never mind.

Mr. B (#10,093)

The Awl's top-notch use of visual cues from the '80s and '90s, though, continues to make good in the world.

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