You know what's old? You, the works of art and culture that were once such important signifiers of who you thought you were and what story you wanted to tell the world about yourself, all the promise and potential that portended so many possible futures for your life, the heartbreaking realization that where you are now is about as good as it's going to get and the sneaking suspicion that everyone around you knows how you mask the pathetic realities of your failure to meet even the most attainable goals you once set for yourself but they are too polite to say anything because it's all just too awkward to mention. Those things are all old. But also this record. This record is old.