Wednesday, June 5th, 2013
8

Grain Names, In Order Of Suitability As Names For A Heavy Metal Band

20. Oats

19. Wheat

18. Rice

17. Barley

16. Corn

15. Buckwheat

14. Spelt

13. Rye

12. Grano

11. Farro

10. Bulgur

9. Millet

8. Triticale

7. Emmer

6. Kaniwa

5. Sorghum

4. Einkorn

3. Teff

2. Kamut

1. Amaranth

8 Comments / Post A Comment

whizz_dumb (#10,650)

Teff over Farro? JESUS CHRIST YOU HAVE TO BE KIDDING

@whizz_dumb : Dammit, Bry, all this tells me is that YOU'RE NOT HUNGRY ENOUGH TO BE EDITOR-IN-CHIEF.

beamishy (#11,580)

1. Einkorn
2. Kamut
3. Bulgur
4. Grano
5. Emmer
6. Farro
7. Amaranth
8. Corn
9. Rye
10. Kaniwa
11. Spelt
12. Buckwheat
13. Sorghum
14. Triticale
15. Teff
16. Millet
17. Wheat
18. Barley
19. Rice
20. Oats

dorkmuffin (#231,236)

Turns out there are four (count 'em, four) metal bands named Amaranth. None named teff, farro, einkorn, kamut, emmer, organ though.

http://www.metal-archives.com/search?searchString=amaranth&type=band_name

dorkmuffin (#231,236)

@dorkmuffin *or grano, not organ. I'm sure there are a thousand metal bands named organ.

Dave Bry (#422)

Holy shit! Thanks, @dorkmuffin! I had no idea!

daemonsquire (#9,523)

Also, suitably named or not, OATS shred, like wheat only ever hoped it could–or they did back in mid 90s SF, at least… Since then, they've morphed into White Hills, who will be upstaging Doors tribute band, The Cult, on the road this summer.

Anyway, just saying: if you'd heard OATS live, they'd redeem a level of metallic suitability no lower than, say, millet or spelt…

(I posted this note earlier, on 6 June, but I think I've discovered, since then, that if I embed hyperlinks, it results in my comments being removed from the post's permalink??? Ah, well, it went to a live OATS performance, of which a few can be found, searching YouTube for "oats" in conjunction with "Nightbreak", a long gone SF club at which they frequently played)

beamishy (#11,580)

I stand corrected.

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