Tuesday, February 5th, 2013

Evolution Has Voted Against TV-Watching Slobs

Best seen on a TV screen.If you enjoyed the usual American male weekend of constant television viewing while sunk deep in the pizza-crush folds of your sofa, evolution has already decided it doesn't want your kind in the generations to come. That's why low-activity men who watch lots of television have dramatically lower sperm counts than those who get some exercise.

The subjects of the study were college-aged men in New York state, aged 18-22. The first group did 15 hours of "moderate to vigorous physical activity per week," about 2 hours daily. The second group just slobbed out in front of the flat screen for 20 or more hours weekly. Besides being incredibly dull people, the latter group also had remarkably lower sperm counts than those who exercised. The active men had 73% more sperm than the couch sloths.

Clocking up 20 hours a week of TV time appears to be detrimental, the US authors from Harvard say in the British Journal of Sports Medicine. Yet 15 hours or more of exercise a week boosts semen quality, according to the results in nearly 200 college students.

Sperm counts have been declining in developed nations for years now, although not enough to affect the ability of these lethargic males from reproducing. Eventually, however, when climate change has made the Earth a water-covered globe with a few heavily populated islands, those men with the higher sperm counts will have an advantage in the annual "try to have a baby" lottery.

7 Comments / Post A Comment

jfruh (#713)

Ken, you've got the waterworld scenario all backwards. Couch-slobs will get laid constantly, since babies are strictly rationed under Island Law and all the birth control pill/condom factories will be underwater.

deepomega (#1,720)

Doesn't this all just get down to how you define "high quality semen"?

In all seriousness, I'd like to see them re-run this study using 30- to 40-year-old men with desk jobs, and see how many of them can work out 2 hours per day. I could see the correllation being to "the type of guys who choose to work out two hours per day given near-infinite leisure time," as opposed to being connected to the actual exercise hours logged per se.

hershmire (#233,671)

@Setec Astrology Really, who the hell has more than two hours to kill on exercise every day of the week?

Commuting on the subway qualifies as "moderate to vigorous physical activity".

Wait, people who exercise two hours a day are interesting?

PoignancySelz (#238,693)

@My Number Is My Address This is a Loser-Loser study.

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