Friday, January 11th, 2013
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IBM Supercomputer "Watson" Learns Filthy Words From Illiterate Kids

Remember "Watson," the fancy IBM computer that appeared on Jeopardy as Alex Trebek a contestant? A scientist at IBM tried to teach it the slang used by the kids, probably so the supercomputer can write the next Twilight series or maybe churn out a three-volume slash-fiction series loosely based on Twilight or À la recherche du temps perdu. In order to make the genius computer speak in a way modern idiots would understand, researcher Eric Brown forced Watson to digest the entirety of UrbanDictionary.com—the whole filthy thing, with its Boston Steamers and Donkey Punches and King James Versions.

Brown attempted to teach Watson the Urban Dictionary. The popular website contains definitions for terms ranging from Internet abbreviations like OMG, short for "Oh, my God," to slang such as "hot mess." But Watson couldn't distinguish between polite language and profanity—which the Urban Dictionary is full of. Watson picked up some bad habits from reading Wikipedia as well. In tests it even used the word "bullshit" in an answer to a researcher's query.

The once brilliant supercomputer was so dumb after its immersion in the world of Urban Dictionary that researchers had to wipe the whole episode out of its memory.

3 Comments / Post A Comment

SkinnyNerd (#224,784)

What happened when they made it read twitter?

LondonLee (#922)

"Open the pod bay doors, Hal"

"Go fuck yourself, Dave"

PoignancySelz (#238,693)

Our cyber-hero was experiencing a golden shower and….let's see who is a trivia master now.

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