Football Pick Haikus For Week 2

Thursday, September 13

At Green Bay -5 Chicago
Home games at Lambeau
shouldn’t happen until the
tundra is frozen. PICK: BEARS

Sunday, September 16

At NY Giants -7.5 Tampa Bay
Buccaneers defense
surprisingly stout but the
Giants should play angry. PICK: GIANTS


At New England -13.5 Arizona
The Cardinals should
chose a random fan for their
starting quarterback. PICK: PATRIOTS

Minnesota -1.5 At Indianapolis
Christian Ponder sounds
like some kind of dating site
where no one gets laid. PICK: COLTS

New Orleans -2.5 At Carolina
Saints play like “Treme”:
It looks good but at the end
Nothing has happened. PICK: PANTHERS

At Buffalo -3 Kansas City
Ryan Fitzpatrick
went to Harvard, so he knows
words like “impuissant.” PICK: BILLS

At Philadelphia -2.5 Baltimore
The Dream Team barely
Defeated the Browns. Does Ray
Lewis Ever Sleep? PICK: RAVENS

Oakland -2.5 At Miami
Both of these teams could
clearly go 0-16.
Now only one will! PICK: RAIDERS

At Cincinnati -7 Cleveland
By NFL rules
one of these teams has to win
this game, so go Browns. PICK: BROWNS

Houston -7 At Jacksonville
Arian Foster
is still healthy so he’ll score
500 touchdowns. PICK: TEXANS

Dallas -3 At Seattle
Seahawks’ offense is
mainly scab-ref blown calls of
pass interference. PICK: COWBOYS

Washington -3 At St. Louis
DC’s best addition since

At Pittsburgh -5.5 NY Jets
Does anyone think
bringing in Tim Tebow scares
Troy Polamalu? PICK: JETS

At San Diego -6 Tennessee
10:30 Football
means Halftime Show is my dream
of Venice penguins. PICK: CHARGERS

At San Francisco -6.5 Detroit
Lions can come back
from big first half deficits.
so they should be Prez? PICK: LIONS

Monday, September 17

At Atlanta -3 Denver
Peyton Manning plays
great in domes but I love to
pick for him to lose. PICK: FALCONS

Haiku Picks went 9-7 for opening week.

Jim Behrle tweets at @behrle for your possible amusement.