13) No-frills paisleys
12) Shelled, deveined shrimp
11) New born opossums
10) Old-man toenails (fungus afflicted)
9) Botero nudes
8) Hippopotamus tusks
7) Eagle talons
6) Lion teeth
5) Bison horns (especially when affixed to a fuzzy lodge club hat)
4) Commas
3) Apostrophes
2) Sea otters, floating on their backs, hunching up to open a mollusk, or, when the the sharp little hook that once attached the Cashew nut to the base of its apple is still there, fellating themselves
1) Shmoo
Related: Nuts, In Order
Photo by FotoosVanRobin
You need to find a better source of shrimp.
Better than underneath the Union Street Bridge on the Gowanus Canal?
@Dave Bry Well, that at least explains it, and gets you bonus points for urban foraging (you nut job).
THEY LOOK FUCKING DELICIOUS ASSHOLE
And they ARE delicious, jfruh!
@jfruh Shmoo are delicious as well.
@Dave Bry Sorry, Dave, I didn't look at the byline on the story! I assumed this was more of Balk's anti-cashew hate speech.
Fetuses
Everyone else is imagining Balk just sitting there in a RAGE, right???
Now I know what/who a Schmoo is.
@hockeymom it's also a biological process for yeast reproduction.
@hockeymom I was a little hesitant to wiki that at work, but it's totally fine and surprisingly detailed.
When still attached to the cashew fruit, they look like a portly banana slug with an enormous mandible.
@BadUncle Here's a photo of these incredibly delicious fruits that even Balk would eat, if they could be shipped.