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Armadillos Are Illegal To Sell In Texas And Extraordinarily Well Endowed
“I’m telling you the law. It’s illegal to sell a living armadillo. By statute. Dead armadillos you can sell parts of them. Make a curio of a little armadillo on his back drinking a bottle of beer.”
—Scott Vaca, in Gail Collins' op-ed in today's Times, which is actually about Herman Cain and how Collins will not be writing about him anymore. Did you know that a male armadillo's penis is two-thirds the length of its entire body? I did not.
Also, armadillos are among the few nonhuman animals that can contract and transmit leprosy, so, uh, watch out is all I'm saying.
A high school friend had an armadillo he smuggled in a sock from Mexico. Evidently, they go into little coma balls for a couple of days when you over feed them. Anyway, it was very friendly, for an armored rat personnel carrier. But I regretted petting it years later when I learned that armadillos frequently carry leprosy.
@BadUncle Wow. An anecdote about smuggling an armadillo in a sock posted beneath a video about how armadillos are incredibly well-endowed is just too much Spinal Tap to not say, "Spinal Tap!" (Armadillos look like they have armadillos in their trousers?) And I didn't know that they carried leprosy. Fascinating creatures, these armored rats.
@Dave Bry For your next article in this great Armadillo series, you should post "Home with the Armadillo"
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VKyqKlkylS4
The armadillo has been my totem animal for over 25 years.
Um, yea me?
2/3 the length of his body? Sounds about right.
@johnpseudonym They're no barnacles, though.
@dntsqzthchrmn You beat me to it. Don't you wish you were 90% penis?
@deepomega I've been called a higher ratio than that.
Wait. That guy is riding a cow or something. What's THAT about?
My Dad'd dad (terrible person) used to sell armadillo drinking lonestar doorstops, but even as terrible as he was, he never ever sold a taxidermied one. That's just…ugh.
Alright, I wanna come back as an armadillo.
"horny plates"
also, I'm still not completely convinced that's not Michael Palin?