People Who Want Nose Jobs May Be Crazy
"About one in three people seeking rhinoplasty — commonly called a nose job — have signs of body dysmorphic disorder, a mental health condition in which a person has an unnatural preoccupation with slight or imagined defects in appearance." The rest just have really big noses that make them horrifically unattractive to potential romantic partners and tend to cause small children to recoil in fear and are also the reason that everyone is talking about them behind their backs even though when confronted they try to pretend that they were having a conversation about last night's "Modern Family." Really, there's nothing worse than the crippling shame that comes with having a mammoth snout. It makes it hard to hold one's head high. BECAUSE THE NOSE IS JUST SO BIG AND HEAVY. God I hate my nose.
I knew it! "Modern Family" wasn't on last night!
For Christ's sake Balk we're not talking about you because of your nose, we're talking about you because you've got ball powder all over the seat of your longpants.
Also you smell sort of funny?
@jolie He smells like a hot trough of raw chicken wings.
@deepomega @*#&^@**@#!@#IOI@*&@*#(@*&*
@jolie I'm usually talking about the shelf-groin he's got going on.
@IBentMyWookie Pleated longpants
When God handed out noses in your family you thought he said roses, so you asked for a big one.
@dado Mea culpa, "you thought He said roses". Sorry Yahweh.
@dado Shouldn't that be YHWH?
@Geoff Fantastic@twitter יי
@Setec Astrology Ack! Let's try again: יְיָ
@Setec Astrology OK, clearly The Awl commenting system's failure to properly display HTML-encoded Hebrew bespeaks a deep underlying anti-Semitism on the part of the editorial staff.
@Setec Astrology Scene: the gym
Bro 1: "You taking any supplements to bulk up dude?"
Bro 2: "Yah, whey."
what are you talking about?! Humpty had zero problem getting laid.
#DUNKS
@Art Yucko I heard he once got busy in a Burger King bathroom.
These scientists have obviously never seen Glee.
body dysmorphic disorder is just something ugly scientists came up with to feel better about themselves.
A big honking nose advertises a big honking cock. Why would you not want to advertise this?
this is true, and it does.
@Rod T: as a Jew with a Roman nose – I can attest to the 100% accuracy of this statement.
@HiredGoons No, no, no. It's hand size. Why yes I do wear XXL gloves, why do you ask?
@HiredGoons *call me
You know what they say about a man with a big nose? He is terrible at cunnilingus.
@deepomega NOT ACCORDING TO HUMPTY HUMP
Ms.Eskimo Kiss will see you in her front office now.
@deepomega It's not on the cancer list.
@deepomega Taint necessarily so.
@deepomega GODDAMMIT. What does mean for those of us who enjoy a nice Jewy* proboscis on a man?
*scientific term.