Gays Thrown Into Hot Turmoil!

@hockeymom The solution, of course, is to have a domestic reception after the destination wedding.

@hockeymom: You can also keep the $30,000 that you saved by not hiring a tent, limo, caterer etc. at 10x normal cost because it's for a wedding, as well as saved friendships. We got married in St. Lucia with a wedding party of 10 people, staying in a 5* resort for a week, for under $10k, with no stress. I can buy my own stand mixer.

I say ELOPE and tell no one. My third wedding was the charm and there were two people there, i.e. the ones getting married (three, if you count the kooky white-satin-clad official who married us at the Beverly Hills Courthouse.)

@Astigmatism This. Unless you wedding will be attended by eye-talians or poles, LEAVE. Mine was attended by cheap anglos and aged mexicans and I, in no way, came out ahead. I'm happy that we all got together before people (well, the important ones) started dying off, but we could have just done a destination wedding with a small, nice dinner with close family. I could have then taken that reception money and bought a kitchenaid mixer in every color.

@winchesterwolcott Word about the Italians…maybe not so much.
My Italian relatives traveled from Boston to the frozen tundra via a caravan of Cadillacs. When they arrived at the reception, my uncle Rocco immediately took my husband into the bathroom and told him if he ever did anything to me, Rocco would "take him out into the woods and only one person would be comin' back."
We probably could have avoided that unpleasantness by having our wedding on an island somewhere, as I don't believe Cadillacs can cross the ocean.

@keisertroll According to New Jersey Magazine, Asbury Park is the most gay-friendly beach in NJ. You could celebrate there!

Of course, you have to keep in mind that their second choice is Ocean Grove.

Haddon Heights.

@keisertroll The lawn of the governor's mansion — Punxasquamscuddy or whatever its called — is lovely, although you might want to schedule the ceremony for when Chris Christie is being helicoptered/limoed/carried somewhere on a litter.

@C_Webb God help the public employee litter bearers.

@keisertroll I think the ceremony at The Breakers in Spring Lake and the reception at . . . maybe Watermark on the beach in Asbury? With an after party at Paradise, of course.

@oudemia Gov. Christie is Creating Jobs by consumption (of food-stuffs) and distribution (on his waist).

/not nice

@keisertroll The Deptford Mall, of course.

@Matt I live two towns over from Collingswood, but ONE town over from Haddon Heights. Maybe I'll just go down to Mount Ephraim instead.

@Vulpes VOORHEES TOWN CENTER OR NOTHING

@keisertroll: Feathers on Kinderkamack Road in River Edge.

NJTransit is going to have to add at least four colors to its logo by the time we get marriage.

@keisertroll My uncle just opened a bar in Haddonfield, I am seriously throwing this out there: South Jersey Awl Bawl.

@Matt I thought Haddonfield was dry (could be the part of Haddon Township they say is Haddonfield), but I'm game for a South Jersey and/or Philadelphia Awl Bawl.

@keisertroll My family is always liberal when it comes to naming the exact area of things, so this could be it. I could totally do a South Jersey/Philly Awl Bawl, maybe we could turn my cousin's wedding next month into one. They'll all be too drunk to notice by that point.

@Matt That's what the bachelorette party is for.

@keisertroll You don't see many solid NJTransit jokes, I'm impressed.

@Aatom You must not ride NJTransit buses often.

@keisertroll Every day. Which is why I know how humorless they can be.

@Aatom The 450 to Cherry Hill Mall is more absurd than humorous, but there's still a laugh or two.

@Lockheed Ventura QUEER COMES THE BRIDE

@keisertroll PRIDEZILLA

@Lockheed Ventura: 16 AND NOT PREGNANT

@Lockheed Ventura Gay Gypsy weddings will be the best ones. Period.

@JoshUng PROTIP: Next time drop your sister off at a PATH station in NJ/Metro North station in Westchester/CT/LIRR station in Long Island. Manhattan's not for drivin'! Unless she's carrying a bunch of stuff, I guess, but really how much stuff can a Manhattan apartment even hold?

@jfruh Yeah, normally that's the plan, but she did have a lot of stuff. She does the whole "well, I'm back in NJ so I need to stock up" thing, and while they don't take up a lot of room, 12 packs of soda and other groceries aren't quite train friendly.

Leaving the city was actually much easier than it normally was. All the cops were directing the parade, and not screwing with the traffic trying to get into the tunnel.

@JoshUng Seriously, I'm supposed to feel bad for someone who decides to drive through the village A) ever B) on Pride? Get over yourself!

@allyzay Relax, I'm not seriously asking for sympathy. Also, I'm pretty sure its an unwritten rule that you are allowed to be unreasonably mad at anybody when you're stuck in traffic.