8
Science, not persuaded by the commonsense answer of "because they can," has a theory about why squirrels masturbate: It's to avoid squirrel STDs. "A masturbating squirrel gets cleaner genitals in two ways – it scrubs the outside bit and flushes out the inside ones."
Vishnu willing, if I keep up my yoga practice, I'll have my nuts in my mouth by thanksgiving and then it's goodbye whorehouse.
See, I've been explaining for years that I'm doing it for the exact same reason. But people won't believe it because the squirrels keep getting the clap.
I'm gonna start using that excuse. Not that I need one.
I have a squirrel paw back scrubber. I'm need to check this out.
should be I'm a be needing or need be I
"But ma, I was just playing with my nuts."
The same reason I do, to scare the other people on the bus.