Thursday, June 24th, 2010
18

Scary Science Gibberish: Sharks Making Monsters In Their Stomachs!

SHARK MONSTERThere's nothing quite so wonderful as an alarmist science scandal-you know, the kind of thing that sounds really really bad but you don't really know why? And we get a lot of that, because sometimes the wonderful people at National Geographic are basically the TMZ of science and animals. Because: Sharks Carrying Drug-Resistant "Bacterial Monsters! SHARKS! Monsters! The coming plague! Sharks carrying monsters in their little fins! Or, um, sharks are making a heady brew in their stomachs of drug-resistant thingies! "Though sharks aren't a staple in the human diet, we eat what they eat-crab, shrimp, and other fish. So people should be aware of these risks and handle food appropriately to avoid infection"! Oh my God, I'm so scared now! Of something, but I'm not sure what exactly! (via)

18 Comments / Post A Comment

It's not the shark bite that will kill you, it's the infection.

BadUncle (#153)

Such a misleading headline. I was hoping for some kind of delicious humonculous gestating inside those fat-enriched shark belly belly bellies, finally providing us with an oceanic answer to turduckhen.

deepomega (#1,720)

A tiny, hungry, super-intelligent shark controlling the outer shark.

A master-blaster type thing. I like it.

BadUncle (#153)

Not delicious enough.

nyssa23 (#4,503)

Heck, I thought it was going to be MegaShark.

Art Yucko (#1,321)

It's not so much a plate of sashimi as it is a petri-dish of suicide. The Japanese will love this.

johnpseudonym (#1,452)

I'm more worried about the Asian carp. We're fucked.

mathnet (#27)

"Bacteria have sex, basically" said study leader Mark Mitchell, professor of veterinary clinical medicine at the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign.

deepomega (#1,720)

"He then mimed a hip-thrusting motion while waggling his eyebrows."

MollyculeTheory (#4,519)

In a stunning synthesis of fugu and kopi luwak, the only way to eat crab shrimp and other fish will soon be predigested by a monster bacteria-ridden shark!

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

If Nat'l Geographic is the TMZ of animals, then why don't we hear more about their rehabs and affairs? Do they have rehabs and affairs? Should they have rehabs and affairs?

Art Yucko (#1,321)

HEY MR. WINKING MOUNTAIN LION DUDE! HUGE FAN. HEY WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT THE WHOLE OILY PELICAN DEAL, WHERE SHE HAS TO WEAR AN ANKLE MONITOR? MR. LION?!

A.R. Chrisman (#2,964)

*flashes vagina and throws a palm frond near you* NO COMMENT

HiredGoons (#603)

I have a feeling you're going to ignore this particular problem, until it swims up and bites you in the ass.

ow that hurt (#3,919)

Do sharks get food poisoning when they eat a bad scallop?

john smith (#245,014)

If Nat'l Geographic is the TMZ of animals, then why don't we hear more about their rehabs and affairs
mushroom

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