Bigfoot Searchers Reveal "Important Footage"!

As we discussed this morning, many believe that Bigfoot is alive and real and, yes, in the woods of North Carolina! According to a recently released video clip that Matthew Moneymaker, head of the Bigfoot Field Researchers Organization, describes as "The most important footage of a Sasquatch since the Paterson/Gimlin film taken over 40 years ago," Bigfoot is warm-blooded and likes Zagnut bars.

Retired chief of State Fraud Investigations Bureau and current Bigfoot hunter Michael Greene took the film in North Carolina's Uwharrie National Forest last year using a remote "thermal imager" video camera. "You cannot fool a thermal imager," he says, "as it is recording only the heat signature of what it sees. Thus, a man in a costume would look splotchy and irregular, as his costume would suppress the body heat to varying degrees, unlike a naked man, or Bigfoot, which would appear primarily as a solid color." Science!

On April 28, 2009, Greene trained his camera on a stump where he'd left a Zagnut bar (yum!), pressed record and left the area. When he returned two hours later, the Zagnut bar was gone.

"On reviewing the tape I saw that about half an hour after I drove away, the creature very cautiously approaches, crawling up the hill behind the stump, then reaches up with its right arm and grabs the Zagnut bar. Then it crawls backwards , moving almost out of sight and moves off to the right of the screen. A few seconds later, perhaps emboldened by its success, it reappears on the right side of the screen and moves, standing upright, to behind a tree, where it slowly sways back and forth, giving the viewer a good idea of its enormous bulk.

I don't know what is on that tape. But it is definitely in the woods, and it definitely seems to be naked. Does anyone know if Germans like Zagnut bars?