Friday, May 7th, 2010

These Guys Finally Figured Out How To Wear Sweatpants And Attract Women At The Same Time

Above, some of this nation's young men show off their attempt to start a craze about a dance called the "dick slang," in which men try to show off the sizes of their packages through the process of shaking their hips around while wearing sweatpants, basketball shorts, or other types of pants made of close-fitting cotton.

Why "Slang"? It would seem to be because it's a sort of past-tense version of the verb "sling," which, OK, sure.

A few months back, these guys tried to brand themselves as the Twerk Kingz, which involved them sporting similar lower-body coverings while spotlighting the way their asses moved. Guess they figured that showing off their packages would be more "effective" at whatever they were trying to get across, or at least garner more interesting questions on Formspring? (Dear God, perhaps their collective change in direction was inspired by the perpetually disheveled pop star Ke$ha's order to "just show [her] where your dick's at.") It almost makes you long for the subtlety of Peer Pressure's ottoman-humping tribute to Pretty Ricky.


20 Comments / Post A Comment

katiechasm (#163)

I thought Die Antwoord pioneered that.

riggssm (#760)

When I was in college, I was invited to a DL party (as the token white boy!). This is exactly how I imagined the foreplay before they clicked over to xtube for part II.

BardCollege (#2,307)

DL as in Down Low? How do you find DL people? Wouldn't attending make one no longer DL. Or am I confusing terms?

riggssm (#760)

He thought he was DL. I'm not blatant, but always honest, about my preference for the cock; I'm an obvious mark. Discreet, but legit. (See footnote!)

I've never fathomed the awkward DL community. Then again, I'm white. Also, fuck anyone for judging me?

This guy asked at least 7 people in our res hall *on the same night* to go to Northeastern to circle-jerk, suck dick, and fuck. WTF?!

I could pen a few blind items about guys on the DL who are now proteges to Big Names in hip-hop/rap. I'd just be writing myself a prescription for an ass-kicking with no mercy, but everyone we were in school with knew the deal. And we all gossip wildly about what goes on now that they're in the industry.

Maybe I don't get the pride thing? Who knows.

On reflection, I'm a terrible gay. Most people don't know; when they find out, they don't quite believe it till I prove it. (Maybe this is why people do not wish to do sex to me?)

saythatscool (#101)

Say what you want, but this video is proof that those Princeton Think Tanks know how to party.

Mindpowered (#948)

Desperately trying to link the error message the I get when clicking on the video to the small dick post earlier…

NicFit (#616)

latent slang

philomene (#355)

I think it works best with the lighter colored trousers in the video. I guess.

doubled277 (#2,783)

I agree. The lighting needs to be better too. I shouldn't have to strain my eyes – kind of defeats their purpose, no?

HiredGoons (#603)

I specifically heard 'homo kids and dirty girls' so at least you know they're down.


*call me

KenWheaton (#401)

This is REALLY gonna set that TSA guy off.

numbersix (#85)

Okay, so that Peer Pressure video?


Sweetie (#519)

Watching this guarantees I'll try the slang at happy hour in 30 minutes. Thanks.

Ribs (#2,690)

YOOOOOoo free publis' for Dick Slang aight

Jeff Barea (#4,298)

Um, are you aspiring for a job at the New York Times trend beat?

Every guy with a big dick for all time has done this. Check youtube again for the youngs keeping up the tradition they learned from Adam and Shallzeebab.

BoHan (#29)

Size Matters? Oh crap. Time for more Bourbon.

kate327 (#3,814)

"…the peacock puts on a show to attract the peahen. The peacock raises his long colorful tail feathers into the air and shakes them. The shaking of his tail feathers sounds like leaves rustling in the wind. The peacock faces the peahen, with his rustling tail feathers and follows her around making loud mating calls. If the peahen takes interest, she will allow the peacock to mate with her…"

YoWheez (#3,516)

& this is only the sneak peek! I can hardly wait for the feature length video.

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