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The Weekend Was Really Icy For Bros
Apart from reports of icings late on Friday at Pitchfork and various other late-in-the-day icings, we also heard that the author of our post on "Bros Icing Bros" was iced three times on Saturday alone. (We expect an update later. When he gets out of the hospital, I guess.) Will this nightmare never end? No, because here are Salon's Alex Pareene, Gawker's Hamilton Nolan and NY1's Roger Clark getting iced at the mini-putt.
It's pretty clear to me from the way that Pareene is taking that bottle, he was never breast fed as a baby.
Great, now icing is popular amongst bros and ironic fans of bros. THANKS AWL.
I'm carrying a butane torch to defrost the first fun-seeker who tries to pull this shit with me.
YAY.
i was prepared to meet any threats of icing with "go.fuck.yourself" but i like your plan much better.
Ham No is such a Bro! Check it out – his bottle is already almost empty, while the other two are barely getting started.
Roger Clark exhibits the Omnipotence of a Stooges shirt and he's in last place?!
Hanging out with Roger Clark would be worth the humiliation of being iced. No, wait, nothing would be.
When you bros become men and give up novelty drinking, join me at the bar for a civilized whiskey.
Bros 2 Men. "It's so hard to say goodbye to icing bros and lax."
Every time intelligent people succumb to a cheesy viral marketing scheme, another vile account executive gets a corner office.
Yeah, Smirnoff Ice must just love being mocked.
-What was it I just mentioned about Pareene, in that previous post?
-meta.-
Here is a secret: I love Smirnoff Ice and Mike's Hard Lemonade.
I add vodka, though.
I love Mike's. It was my gateway drink and I can't forget that.
Mike's is awesome. All the booze with none of the hoppy aftertaste.
I am in full support of straight guys publicly demonstrating proper oral sex technique. This Roger Clark fellow's beatific expression gets first prize. Also, future male prison inmates, note how he is choking down the sacred elixir like a trooper. Go Roge!
Where in the annals of sexy gay sex does it say it's okay to tuck in a Stooges t-shirt?
Right below where it says you can tie your hoodie around your waist and tuck your reading matter in the hood itself.
That's actually the user's manual that comes with HamNo and Pareene's Swedish dildos.
It's times like this when I'm ashamed of being a straight white male who was (quite happily) in a fraternity in college.
If you do this to girls, do you call it getting Smirr'd?
And if you add Pabst to the situation, well… forget I even mentioned it.
That photo is suspiciously high resolution. I'm pretty sure it is a viral campaign.
If you kneel on your left knee, it means you're gay.
Plus, he's showing a lot of leg.
I don't know what is making me more queasy, the thought of drinking Smirnoff Ice or the thought of kneeling on Astroturf.
Hey, if it was good enough for the Brady Bunch's backyard, it's good enough for you to get shredded knees on.
As if I needed one more reason not to play miniature golf.
Hating mini-golf? There goes your Dad of the Year award…
Then so be it!
Actually, I'm ok with children playing putt putt and even adults playing it IF THEY HAVE CHILDREN WHO ARE PLAYING IT.
What about IRONIC mini-golf, played while ironically bro-ing and ice-ing one another?
Nope. Only good ole-fashioned authentic children having fun mini-golfing allowed (for some reason I seem to have staked out a position here and must stick with it at all costs).
I'll back you up here, kneetoe. Ironic adult mini-golfers should be fined…or at least pay extra.
@kneetoe: You and Rand Paul…
@Setec: Low blow! But, sure, I mean, I'm not personally ageist, I respect people of all ages, I would never harm an oldster, no matter how easy it is to do, but if a putt-putt place only wants to accept children and their parents, I don't think the government should interfere.
@kneetoe: but what if you're on a date?!?! is mini-golf allowed then?
Only at the beach?
@t: What, ARE YOU IN LAW SCHOOL!
Only if the date eventually leads to children.
Hamilton’s tough-guy shit seemed cooler before I saw this picture. I’ll never read his boxing commentary the same way again.
The day that putt-putt with Roger Clark is not considered hardcore is the day I move to Gaylandia.
I’m full of shit anyway. Nothing, not even if that picture was taken at a bubblegum-scented chest-waxing salon, would stop me from enjoying the boxing commentary.
HamNo! Ladies and gents, this post is now officially HamNorriffic. Hams, you are a god among mini-golfers. Don't let anybody tell you different. There is nothing softcore about you, not even your possible move to sexxxy Gaylandia where the putting is endless and the grass is well-cut.
Damn, look at the guns on Nolan. You can't walk around like that and NOT expected to be mercilessly iced…HE WAS ASKING FOR IT.
I'd like to know Hamilton's thoughts on a possible ICING + CROSSFIT MERGER.
Is Alex old enough to drink now? Adorable!
on a totally unrelated note: YAY! I got a newsletter again!
I WAS WONDERING WHO ELSE GOT IT!
I thought you guys or someone would have noted by now that it was Cajun Boy doing the icing and taking the pic. Insidery!!!
Um, shouldn't the bro who iced those media bros get some credit for the icing of said bros? (COUGH, COUGH)
Not if you have to explain it, bro.
If that's what you want, so be it.
I have just learned that this is also done with Twisted Tea. The practice is called "Teaing Off."