Barack Obama's decision to declare himself as "black" on his census form rather than choosing a biracial option has so outraged conservatives that they can make furious declarations like this one without any sense of awareness:
The obvious contrast is between the president and Tiger Woods, who calls himself "Cablinasian-Caucasian-black-Indian-Asian. But Mr. Woods plays the game of golf, not that of race. He has never encouraged his fans to celebrate him as the first great black golfer. Yet "first black president" was always part of candidate Obama's sales pitch. Thus, in at least this one important respect, Mr. Woods-unlike President Obama-is the free man blacks through the centuries of bondage yearned to be.
I mean… wow.
Yes. Blacks throughout the centuries of bondage yearned for nothing more than to bone a bunch of sexy white women. *facepalm*
Were I the author of the piece, I would be far more offended that there isn't a box on the census form labeled "Boob."
Abigail Thernstrom and her annoying husband have spent decades telling us that the noble civil rights movement should declare victory and stfu, but they haven't figured out how race actually works in this country, and they do everything they can to kneecap the discussion. Turning to the actual experts:
[Eric] Bogosian: Is there such a thing as a black community, really? A welfare mother in Brownsville, a Nigerian selling watches on Fifth Avenue, an upper-middle-class Atlanta suburbanite, a nanny from Jamaica — what do these people have in common other than skin?
[Chris] Rock: If it all goes wrong with each one of these people, they'd end up living in the exact same neighborhood. That's reality.nytimes
Whoa. Forgot about that one. Good find. Also:
Rock: Smart's knowing if you're dumb. Knowing when to shut up and to listen to people that are smarter than you. Put it this way, the inability to get a joke is the first sign of ignorance. Like when you tell a joke about a guy and he gets mad at you? That's a dumb guy.
Right. So, moral? Reallife Chris Rock makes a great imaginary president but imaginary Chris Rock makes a terrible movie president (see State, Head of, or don't).
Hint: don't.
At least there's DJ Quik's score.
Maybe this is too much of an assumption, but I think that "blacks through centuries of bondage" wanted one day to be President, not Top Golfer.
At least, so sayeth Wyclef Jean.
A little uppity, wouldn't you say? There'll be a time & place for that in a few more generations. Prudence, Decency, all that. Baby Steps!
Also, before you call "racism", know that I don't see race, so it can't be that.
Some of my best friends are golfers.
There is no "Kenyan" option?
President Obama can totally fix this by staring silently into the camera as the voice of his dead father asks him if he has learned anything.
Haha, yearn. Yearn! Like slaves were "yearning" to not be slaves. You can't do anything but laugh.
I think if you don't check black you might miss out on any future possible reparation payments. Why sell the option.
TRUE. Also, if he wants to go back to school after this, he may qualify for more scholarships.
This reverse racial purity thing is giving me a headache.
Word. Amazing how certain white people have become the strongest advocates for race not being a factor in any decision-making. Affirmative action–now THAT'S racism.
Does she know what the word 'obvious' means?
See, when he said there's no white America and no black America, he wasn't saying there are not white Americans and no black Americans.
It's funny how so many Republicans who object to Obama's view of his own racial identity don't apply the same thinking when it comes to admitting folks like him into their country clubs. I'm pretty sure, in the latter case, most of them would just put the ol' checkmark next to "black" and that would be that.