To Knifecrime Island, where... oh, just read it: "AN alleged pervert was caught with a picture of a man having sex with a dead SQUID, a court heard today. Andrew Dymond, 46, was netted when cops apparently found a haul of grossly offensive porn on his home computer. JPs heard the sea creature was clearly dead in the picture and a man was having sexual intercourse with it." You'll want to click through on this one for the accompanying photo. Also, there is this: "Four of the allegations state he had images showing acts likely to cause 'serious injury to a woman's breasts' and private parts." Can I get a "what a world"? Thank you.
Thursday, March 4, 2010
26
Well, in all fairness, what kind of idiot would try to fuck a live squid?
That picture makes me feel like I'm in the back of the school bus with the older boys who are telling stories and jokes that I know are dirty but which I don't actually understand.
I don't really know how regular squids look when they're alive? So is that just a funny blacked-out photo, or is that the dead squid, with a penis in it?
I thought a blow job involved a hair dryer for a really long time.
Dumbass! It's only used for a short time.
DON'T CALL ME DUMB!!! THAT'S WOMAN-ON-WOMAN CRIME, I'M TELLING JEZEBEL. (FATTY!)
How many quid for a squid?
That looks disgusting! Oh, wait it's a food ad. My mistake.
Live-action hentai?
At least he wasn't trying to fuck a bunny rabbit.
Dymond, of Mumbles, Swansea, was freed on conditional bail and is due to appear again on May 12.
MUMBLES.
Catherine Zeta Jones come from Mumbles.
The URLs for news stories on The Sun website always include /sol/ in them. I always thought it was included because it is the Latin for sun but I have just been told it stands for "Sun Online". Disappointing.
I bet he's also banned from ordering calamari.
Why is this illegal? Was the squid underage?
The squid was his boss. They were creating an unsafe workplace environment.
He has been sentenced to a gift certificate from Long John Silvers.
Ick, squid marks.
The police must have thought there was something fishy going on...
He then complained to his buddies that when he went down on her 'she tasted fishy*.'
*(I know SOMEthing about heterosexual relations)
will they change the name to squidcrime island? is necrocephalophilia a word?
i think i feel more pity for the photographer than the squid fucker...standing around waiting for sloppy seconds
Well, necrocephalopilia certainly has a nice ring to it. Let's see what we can do.
Necrocephalophilia is a regularly-formed compound but it would have to mean a fondness for Dead Heads. Which is perverted all right, but off-topic. And a necrocephalopodophile could designate foot-fetishism targeted at Dead Heads, which is just too gross to think about.
I almost feel refreshed having found evidence of an idiot in its purest, most complete form.
Calamari is the Latin for 'cock ring'
Nice...the perv can't have contact with humans under 16, but the court says nothing about squid under 16.
Will somebody please think of the squid children?
squid have beaks! flayed penis! FLAYED PENIS.
this is burned in my mind now