"There was a donkey painted like a zebra, hitched to a cart full of sombreros, a Tijuana photo opportunity. But no smiling tourists stepped into the picture frame." Ha ha. Wait, really? 18,000 murders in three years and now Tijuana is empty? But... but... but the U.S. had 17,000 murders in 2006 alone! The murder rate per population in Mexico isn't even double ours. But. WHY was the donkey painted like a zebra though??? I don't get it.
Friday, March 19, 2010
20
I'm confused: does the 18,000 number only cover drug-war-related murders, or all murders? The story kinda leaves it ambiguous, I think.
In the same vein, I really like the bit that's like "Surely by 'everything' this shady Mexican was discussing guns or drugs, because that is all he knows, and after this rash assumption we left town forever and never sought clarification, but put it in the story anyway because conjecture is great!"
Whatever, you convinced me. I'm heading to Tijuana this afternoon
We were stuck in the traffic at the border once, seeking to return to the U.S., and a Tijuana street kid spent a half hour trying to sell us a plaster seagull. Once my buddy had bargained him down from $15 to $4 dollars, he took the seagull from the kid and smashed it on the ground. This is why I choose not to return to Tijuana.
Um, one side of me wants to say that's awesome in a frat-boy type shreik, but really, that's pretty fucked up. In a I'm-currently-laughing kind of way, obv
All the tourists are going to Juarez. Clearly.
Um, these drugs they speak of...
This type of thing has always struck me as particularly cruel. Geraldo Rivera moved to near where I lived when I was in high school. One day, my mom had to take our dog to the vet. She was sitting in the waiting room when a woman walked carrying a small dog with spots on its fur that looked exactly like those of a leopard. After a couple of minutes, my mom had to ask, "Excuse me, what kind of dog is that? I've never seen one that looked like that."
"Oh," said the woman. "That's not her natural coat. We had them painted on. A friend of ours paints dogs. We have another one at home with zebra stripes!"
As my mom sat and pondered this, another woman there turned to the owner of the painted dogs and said, "Excuse me, but aren't you C.C.?"
"Yes," she said.
"I'm [woman's name], we met at the [so-and-so's] party. We're so happy to have you and Geraldo in the neighborhood..."
They spoke for a little while longer, my mom eavesdropping. It was Geraldo's wife, C.C. Dyer. Geraldo Rivera paints his dogs to look like other animals. Or, at least, he once did.
"This type of thing has always struck me as particularly cruel: Geraldo Rivera moved to near where I lived."
FIXED.
Right. Thanks, Hired Goons!
I'll invoice you.
My friends' parents retired to Cape Cod Bay, in the next town over from where Geraldo (now divorced from C.C., I think) has a summer place. From the stories they tell, having him nearby is cruel, indeed.
Because otherwise it would be too much of a stereotype.
These drugs that they speak of aren't too hard to find at all.
A few years back I went to Nogales, across the border from Arizona, with my great-grandmother who loved to collect those tiny souvenir spoons with outlines of states and tortured children like the Dionne Quintuplets on the handles. She'd ask every vendor on the street if they had spoons for sale, then they'd run around to the back of the store and come back with banged up teaspoons loaded with what I could only presume to be shitty looking cocaine or heroin.
So just head south of the border, down Mexico way, and tell everyone there that you're collecting spoons. Wackiness will entail and you'll find out that there's plenty of room at the Hotel Baja California.
Still, the homicide rate is nearly double (10 vs 5.4 per 100K), and Baja has the highest crime rate in Mexico.
Top five homicide rates by state from the pdf on the same site:
Sinaloa: 43.7
Chihuahua: 42.1
Guerrero: 30.2
Durango: 27.8
Baja California Norte: 27.7
For comparison, DC, has the highest homicide rate in the US (35.8), followed distantly by Louisiana (12.7), Maryland (9.4), and New Mexico (8.9).
Of course, the really irritating problem is the focus on spring break, as opposed to the thousands killed in the drug wars. I'm OK with more painted donkey coverage, though.
Who the fuck goes to Tijuana for Spring Break? Or anywhere within driving distance, for fuck's sake; e.g., Ensenada or Rosarita? Tijuana is a one-night fling for underage drinkers. That they'd skip at this particular point in time is not a surprise. Undoubtedly, they are flying over it, to the far-away beaches, where my experience has been that every tourist has his or her own personal una policia, at least in numbers.
Why go all the way to Mexico when you can just get drunk and fall out of your dorm window in Madison?
In Mexico, you can get drunk and fall out the window onto a beach. Better sunburn potential.
That they'd skip at this particular point in time is not a surprise. Undoubtedly, they are flying over it, to the far-away beaches, where my experience has been that every tourist has his or her own personal SEO consultants