Vexed French bishops are expressing their displeasure against a confessional service "set up at the beginning of the Christian fasting period of Lent by Paris-based telephone messaging service AABAS" for the benefit of penitents who are too busy to get themselves to a church. The Daily Mail reports that the clerics reject Phoneline to the Lord as "utterly unacceptable," noting the sacramental value of parishioner-to-priest contact. The phoneline "charges users 30p a minute to confess their sins to an automated answering machine," which sounds to me about as good a description of God as you're likely to get.
UPDATE: Awl pal Juli Weiner did some real reporting and actually spoke to French answering machine God. You can hear it here!
Every time something from 'The Handmaid's Tale' comes true, I get the heebie-jeebies.
Don't let the bastards grind you down!
And all the messages are from someone named Margaret, right?
Your call is very important to God; please stay on the line. Also, I cannot stop laughing about the tags: France, God, religion!
The only reason the Church may be against this is simply on a cost perspective, the more people in attendance the bigger the piggy bank.
I believe that God hears your confession no matter what the medium. If it works for you, urges you to do better and maybe even be more faithful -- go for it.
I'm not sure you're correct here. I've been confessing my sins for around 30 years, and I've never once seen a collection taken up.
I stand corrected Libmas and thanks. Collection plates are for Sunday service and not for confession.
You're most welcome.
I must've dialed wrong, because the Lord sent over another chambermaid, rather than picking up the seven who were already in the backyard.
The French bishops should be thrilled that there's even an inkling of religion in Europe these days. I mean, apart from the all the Muslim extremists, isn't everyone across the pond godless heathens at this point?
Yes, but can I purchase indulgences through Paypal?
If I press 0, can I bypass voicemail and speak with a live deity?
Also, I just clicked through to the story, and there's this- "To listen to some confessions, press three." That's awesome! Does the catholic church offer this feature? I don't think so! If I only knew what 30p was in real money, I would totally try this!
30p is what we used to call 6/- (six bob) before some wanker decided to go all decimal. By today's exchange rate, that's a little less than 50¢ in real money, or four bits, as it used to be known.
Not having lived in the UK since the early 70s, I can't tell you how far 30p would normally stretch. It's probably about the price of half a cup of tea, or half a Stepney blowjob. Not that they sell cups of tea in halves these days, and who the fuck wants half a blowjob?
I'm sure there are confessions worth 30p to some folks, but my curiosity level isn't what it used to be.
about 60 pennies, give or take a day