Never have I seen the ethos of an entire city so perfectly encapsulated by a 50-second segment of local news. Oh, Seattle. Don't ever change.
Friday, March 5, 2010
12
more like Parker Nilla-Wafer, amirite?
I think I saw that guy get kicked out of a U District bar last month.
Those girl scouts can be vicious though. I had to kick a few of them off me once and everyone got all uppity about it.
You reminded me of this:
"My friend Brian, who stands about 6 feet 2 inches and is stronger than myself, estimates that he could take down a dozen 12-year-olds. I find this hard to believe, but he has been in a fight with people his own age and is a little taller, making groin shots more difficult. Brian's reach is much longer than mine as well, which is a huge advantage. If you can land solid shots from a distance longer than the 12-year-olds' legs, there is no need to worry about groin kicks ... If it weren't for the law and my own morals, we could put these pressing questions to rest. Alas, these barriers still stand in our way."
Who the hell are those newscasters? That isn't local Seattle news.
I know it's fox, but that anchorguy? I am related, closely, to some Fox-loving Seattle-ites and he has a style that might not be, uh, fully appreciated. Frankly, I'm sort of surprised I haven't received any email forwards about him.
What?
Why the fudge are idiots making access to those delicious grasshopper mint cookies MORE DIFFICULT!?
And the peanut butter ones, UGH. HEAVEN.
It's not an authentic downtown Seattle montage without a Spoonman shot.
Good to see Don Cheadle signed back up for Oceans Fourteen.
What this is about, if you haven't figured it out, is a semi-clever backlash against a proposed anti-panhandling law in Seattle.
"A poll shows 23 percent of Seattle residents avoid the Downtown area because they believe it's unsafe." Translation: "A poll shows 23 percent of Seattle residents avoid the Downtown area because there are negroes."
Also, Seattle already passed an aggressive panhandling ban in 1987, and add Mayor Mike McGinn's support to my growing list of disappointments with him. But then here in San Francisco we're also debating a "sit-lie" law, with Mayor Gavin Newsom's support. Because clearly, criminalizing poverty is just what we need more of right now!