I do wonder a little what happens to Lost's ratings tonight when all the homosexuals suddenly disappear to watch Johnny. (Although homosexuals are historically underrepresented in Nielsen households, obviously!) Anyway-we don't care if tonight's the night that Hurley finally dies. See you next week, eternally irritating TV show!
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
12
I . . . can't stand him? I mean, I don't have a homosexualist card to turn in, but I pretty much abominate diva routines from anyone who isn't a first-half-of-the-20th-century opera singer. And this whole "PETA's gonna get me" thing is setting up the excuse he will make this time, like Torino's "I missed the bus and the feng shui was off!" Bleah.
But yeah, I'll be missing Lost to watch him too.
(And as much as I cannot call myself a fan, I still think he was just kind of robbed. Hmm.)
Or maybe just, you know, DVR?
I've had enough of people doubling triples. Give me Sawyer and Sayid.
This gay actually is a member of a Nielsen household, and it adds an odd moral component to my television viewing. For instance, I can't ever turn on Glenn Beck, even for a minute, to see him be an ass of himself. I feel like some kind of dutiful representative for my demographic, and it makes me neurotic.
I'm also torn between "Lost" and Weir - I love/hate them both with equal intensity.
So it's a poll. Who should I represent?
[ATTN: NIELSEN COMPANY. This anonymous comment is intended for comedy purposes only.]
Could I just throw Better Off Ted into the mix? I mean, when (!!) it comes back? Pretty please?
Forget Johnny Weir versus "Lost". My conflict is now Johnny Weir versus Evan Lysacek. DID YOU SEE THE SHOTS OF HIM LAST NIGHT IN HIS MANLY JAMES BOND TUXEDO SKATING COSTUME? It is all very confusing and leads me to wonder if Lysacek is an instrument of the right, bred and trained to end the domination of Gays on Ice. I may have to watch "Frontline" instead.
Are homosexuals really supporting Johnny Weir in any consistent way?
Because this homosexual is watching, specifically so I can see Evan Lysacek kick Johnny Weir's annoying ass.
Also?
Evan Lysacek is so cute and I want to have puppies with him, OMG.
He supposedly likes girls. DOES NOT COMPUTE.
Whatever.
Is he still dating Tanith Belbin?
Because if you're going to have a beard, she's pretty top-notch.
If he's a male figure skater, there's no question he's gay.
Have you seen the outfits? You don't get that kind of craftsmanship without blowing *someone*.