The Independent's Simon Carr makes me feel much better about my alcohol consumption. Who knows, he may help you feel better too!
The Independent's Simon Carr makes me feel much better about my alcohol consumption. Who knows, he may help you feel better too!
So what did you tell the doctor on the visit. Or did you just embrace the new paranoia and not go?
Damn, I should read permalinks more often.
I went with THE TRUTH. He seemed unimpressed. Or at least he was more concerned about the smoking. Anyway, the big debate there was whether or not they were going to shave my chest for the EKG, which, as an old person, I now apparently need. Fans of Balk's chest hair everywhere will be thrilled to know that I held the line and I am still massively betufted. Am I oversharing?
This is the best day ever. The return of hidden headlines? An email directly from The Great and Mighty Sicha? An actual update on The State of Healthcare in the Greater Balkans? A gloriously unmolested furry chest? DO THEY KNOW IT'S CHRISTMASTIME AT ALL???
Did they do the EKG among the tufts or not at all? I like your heart.
Also.
I really like the mental image of a panel of medical professionals standing around discussing Balk's chest hair. I hope you were all, "HEY HEY HEY! You do know that this chest hair is famous on the Internet, yes? THE CHEST HAIR HAS A FAN CLUB AND AN ENTOURAGE. Do you want to be responsible for the heartbreak of two or three batshit insane female commenters? I THOUGHT NOT."
(Double also and apologies to everyone for what I'm about to do to your afternoon: Have you determined where you're drawing the hair removal line when it comes to the proctologist visit?)
Oh, I wax there.
Um... I like my men how I like my plush leather armchairs?
(...could also apply to the waxing?)
I'm confused by the term plush leather. MANTOOTH! You've confused the dumb girl again.
(As excited as I am by all this, I cannot be the only one who's slightly disappointed we didn't get a long and meandering post about Balk's first visit to the doctor in 39 years. Didya giggle when he knocked your knee with that silly little mallet? What flavor lollipop did you pick? QUESTIONS, ALEX. I HAVE QUESTIONS.)
Plush and betufted? No?
(Evs. You know my perversions, lady!)
Only a bottle every day? No, that most emphatically does not make me feel better about my daily consumption.
Seriously. Suck it with the Alcohol Units, Britain.
And the liver says...whatever.
I'm cutting back on my drinking, but after reading this maybe I shouldn't.
Win?
Just another reason to deny you health care coverage someday. Someday we will all be obese alcoholic diabetics with ADD.