Elsewhere: Unfortunate Fellow Reads About Jeff Dunham So You Don't Have To
Go here for an amazing demolition of terrible ventriloquist Jeff Dunham and this weekend's New York Times Magazine story about him.
Go here for an amazing demolition of terrible ventriloquist Jeff Dunham and this weekend's New York Times Magazine story about him.
Was that Jack McBrayer in drag who caught the dummy's head at the end of last week's 30 Rock?
Absolutely. He showed up earlier as a laughing hick as well.
"A black guy walks into a bar and orders a malt liquor and the bartender says 'would you like any crack with that because of how all black people also smoke crack?'" That's how jokes work, right?
"He's not a comic. He's a ventriloquist. He's got a great gift, and his gift is that he makes stuff talk and he keeps his mouth pretty much closed when he does it."
People are stupid. Have you ever talked to a person? They want to have sex with dolls. I've never met a doll who wanted to get boinked by an actual person. Have you ever tried to wash Person Effluent off doll clothes? I can't even reach a top-loader to put the Tide in. Don't you ever open your mouth, stupid person? Get your hand out of my ass! People are stupid.
HA HA HA The New York Times. From now on they should just cross-edit all pieces for needless references to "middle America" or whatever and "fat" and if the article itself is not directly about obesity or bad food or something then cut that shit out.
No kidding. Not that it would help the Times' credibility with middle America anyway – that's long gone.
Well, part of that is the Times' readers fault. When somebody decide the GLady's op-ed team was going to become its most important and publicized section… al the other great, experts toiling away in the lesser read sections took the fall.
Gee. If Michael Richards could've talked a doll into sitting in his lap, he'd still have a career.
Glad I am not the only one who doesn't find Jeff Dunham funny.
How about Lisa Lampanelli? 90% of her material is the same kind of bullshit: "Ha ha, Mexicans are lazy! Jews are cheap! I'm fat and like black men! Because black men like fat chicks! Ha ha ha!"
Yes, this compliments the turn in my stomach when some douchey friends send me the latest "greatest" Achmed skit; insisting they have tears of laughter running down their faces bc "OMG This is so fucking hilarious, man!" I felt a giant sad when I saw he got a tv show…
Yeah, the people who try to convince me this guy is funny tend to be the same people who have seen Dane Cook live in concert. Though, for what it's worth, Jeff Dunham makes Dane Cook look like George Carlin. I have never laughed at a single thing that he or his puppet buddies (which he creepily and repeatedly insists are separate from his own being) have ever said.
I quickly realized that by posting anonymously to the internet I could crack jokes and level insults that I am too shy to touch. No freaky dolls required.
Ouch. I just got called out. "iplaudius" has been my hate-spewing dummy on more than one occasion. Must work on that.
No, no, you're cool man. We're all in the same boat here. Lisa Lampanelli sucks. Heh heh.
Realizing that it's more or less "Ventriloquist Dummy 2.0" was just about the only thing that could make the internet creepier than it already was. Congratulations, sir.
"Hated it!"
Jeff Dunham's act would have killed at Auschwitz. All he would have to do is have the dummy turn on the gas and, voila, no Nuremberg for him. At least his act is phisiologically correct; that dummy has a massive piece of shit hanging out it's ass.