The Awl

mathnet on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

mathnet — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 14:44:26 +0000

It is a testament to how hard I was cry-coming that I am STILL GNASHING MY TEETH at the idiot ruiner person who decided to fuck the whole thing up by selecting Where Is Love for the closing credits. I mean, fine. Bang me over the head with it if you must. But at least use an instrumental version! Don't make me listen to the pathetic kid voice singing the pathetic ruin-y lyrics, you china-shop-bull episode-ruiner!

cherrispryte on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

cherrispryte — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 12:14:51 +0000

OMG THE MAGIC, IT HAPPENED! SWORD-WIELDING MERMAIDS FOR EVERYONE!

cherrispryte on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

cherrispryte — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 09:51:39 +0000

I just spent half an hour trying to make this work, and NO MAGIC IS HAPPENING.

Natasha Vargas-Cooper on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Natasha Vargas-Cooper — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 03:38:14 +0000

I knew I would find you here, swooning. DEAR GAWD. Orgasmic.

Natasha Vargas-Cooper on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Natasha Vargas-Cooper — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 03:37:31 +0000

OMG I COULD NOT WORRY LESS ABOUT ADW

mathnet on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

mathnet — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 00:23:36 +0000

is so in love with Jon Hamm it is painful.

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 18:04:24 +0000

Moz : singer :: PBR : beer

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 18:01:14 +0000

Thanks Hey* and Cap*, see my new picture? It's amazingly difficult to accomplish. Had to create a new identity, but then the avatar appeared on my old Bucko account (which is, apparently, someone else entirely than me).

Bittersweet on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bittersweet — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 12:28:24 +0000

Watchmen was a visual feast, but there were certain images I really just didn't need to feast on. Blurgh.

Flashman on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Flashman — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 12:21:38 +0000

BUT NOT WORRIED ABOUT ANDREW LLOYD WEBBER

HeyThatsMyBike on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HeyThatsMyBike — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 11:52:56 +0000

Gravatar.com should allow you both to keep your commenter numbers AND add pictures. I am tech-impaired compared to the likes of the commenters here, and I figured it out, so I have faith in both of you! You just need to make sure your gravatar and awl passwords match, and then magic happens.

#56 on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

#56 — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 09:42:08 +0000

yes! we need a Weekend Special Report.

Natasha Vargas-Cooper on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Natasha Vargas-Cooper — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 01:55:13 +0000

WORRIED ABOUT MOZ.

Natasha Vargas-Cooper on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Natasha Vargas-Cooper — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 01:50:34 +0000

Mary is a shapeshifter.

CaptainFantastic on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

CaptainFantastic — Sun, 25 Oct 2009 00:12:57 +0000

gravatar.com

Dan Kois on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Dan Kois — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 22:11:44 +0000

The Lorrie Moore book is SO GOOD except for that one part. You will know which part it is when you get to it. It is awful.

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 19:08:31 +0000

Racist!

cherrispryte on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

cherrispryte — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 19:06:47 +0000

Your trollings are offensive to real trolls. So no. Also, i could not figure out myself how to add an avatar. Well, i figured it out, but then i'd have to start a new account and loose my awesome "not a year in the last millenium" member number. So if I can't have one, neither can you.

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 18:57:05 +0000

Can someone help a poor troll add a photo to display when I'm trolling you poor saps? It's not like me to ask for help, but even Google isn't helping me out today. Poor sad troll :-<

#56 on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

#56 — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 13:48:43 +0000

First sleep-over with 5 year old niece. We're baking cookies, watching angelina ballerina DVDs and having a tea party. plans subject to change... Plan B: I call sis to pick up her brat early.

brent_cox on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

brent_cox — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 13:31:26 +0000

That sounds like smoking a feature article instead of reading it. And then drinking the bongwater.

BronxWASP on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

BronxWASP — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 08:29:20 +0000

For reading stuff, I recommend the program Word Flash Reader. It flashes words one by one on a screen so you can read "faster." Great for that sh*t you want to read but can't. Also check out the RSVP reader bar in firefox. http://wordflashreader.sourceforge.net/

katiebakes on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

katiebakes — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 01:29:49 +0000

As I currently understand it, he needed space to screen all VI of the Saw franchise. Understandable.

BoHan on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

BoHan — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 00:40:29 +0000

Oh also: Question 6: Should Choire ever lock Balk out again or is he OK with headlining a British lack of knickers?

BoHan on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

BoHan — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 00:38:36 +0000

#airbrushedasses

HeyThatsMyBike on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HeyThatsMyBike — Sat, 24 Oct 2009 00:19:17 +0000

Yikes. SPOILER ALERT! Sorry Gerard Butler and the other 299. And what was that hunchback's story? And the ancient Persians had orcs? Confusing. Verdict: Cool-looking. Hot boys. But I can haz plotline and character development? Oof.

Flashman on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Flashman — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:55:50 +0000

Yeah, and once you're finished with that, this week's issue is an absolute belter: Lethem, SFJ, Lane on Antichrist, and an article on drone-killing that reminds us that the US under Obama remains as fundamentally amoral (I won't say evil) as it ever was with that last guy! Caption contest's a bit of a dud though.

Fredrick on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Fredrick — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:22:48 +0000

I forgot to mention the 'visual feast' aspect. You should just see Watchmen though. Much smarter movie, still nice to look at.

HeyThatsMyBike on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HeyThatsMyBike — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:06:27 +0000

It is visually stunning! Oh look! A tree full of dead people!

HeyThatsMyBike on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HeyThatsMyBike — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:04:26 +0000

If only.

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:02:45 +0000

I loved it, but only in a distant, sort-of, spiritual way. It's awesome in a production values sort of way, but soul-crushing if you're looking for meaning.

kitten_witawip on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

kitten_witawip — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 23:02:42 +0000

You will like it. It will give you a lady boner.

HeyThatsMyBike on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HeyThatsMyBike — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:57:09 +0000

Crap! I am a lady, so I can't get boners! And I am a thinking person! So far, shirtless men = thumbs up. Otherwise I'm really fucking bored.

Fredrick on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Fredrick — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:41:21 +0000

It might insult the 'thinking person' aspect of your being, but not the 'boner' aspect.

Kataphraktos on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Kataphraktos — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:39:06 +0000

Are you using Awl comments to come out of the closet?

HeyThatsMyBike on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HeyThatsMyBike — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:25:33 +0000

Input please: I am watching 300 tonight. Am I going to love it or hate it?

HeyThatsMyBike on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HeyThatsMyBike — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 22:24:26 +0000

I'm told this is because of New Year's/the holidays being a popular time for bareback fucking.

Tulletilsynet on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Tulletilsynet — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 20:38:48 +0000

Paladinissima.

DorothyMantooth on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

DorothyMantooth — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 19:59:21 +0000

Geek test!

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 19:36:57 +0000

#breathlessly_waiting

Flashman on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Flashman — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:23:33 +0000

For me and my friends, the 'hash sign' means holding your fists as if you're pressing two knife blades together.

sox on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

sox — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:22:06 +0000

#workingovertime, #thirddatedoesthatmeanwe'regonna...?! #danceinmypants, #cleanoutthecar (no, that last one is not related to the second two.)

kitten_witawip on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

kitten_witawip — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:16:04 +0000

I am probably going to see that goyishe Coen movie.

Flashman on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Flashman — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:14:13 +0000

What's her alignment? 'Chaotic Neutral' I'd guess.

Maevemealone on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Maevemealone — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:13:47 +0000

I got in some trouble with my building the ONE year I ever stayed home to give out treats. I hit up Economy Candy and got tons of candy cigarettes! Later that night, my doorman saw me and said "Are you the one giving out candy cigarettes?" Yeah! Why? Oh....

ljnd on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

ljnd — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:10:10 +0000

I am trying to get my kid to wear her fedora, carry a glass of apple juice on the rocks, and a Pixie Stick to smoke, and go as "Ron Caper". She does it around the house all the time. But she won't do it in front of her friends.

Maevemealone on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Maevemealone — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:08:04 +0000

Fancy Betty! With the baby, booze and "Mommy's little helpers" bottle in my handbag, next to the smokes. I want it to be a group idea but nobody else fits the theme! Unless I can get that one quiet smart friend to be Peggy...

ljnd on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

ljnd — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:05:12 +0000

OMG, Blind Melon. Massive, massive earworm.

mathnet on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

mathnet — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:04:29 +0000

OMG YOU HAVE SOLVED PROBLEM #1! Choire. All you need to do is wear the new Brooks Brothers suit that you ran out and bought last week. (Just don't go to any of the same Halloween parties as Balk because he also bought one on the double.)

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:04:11 +0000

It's an octothorpe damnit.

andj on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

andj — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 18:02:36 +0000

Read the Lorrie Moore book and then tell us what you think of the last 1/3 of it.

IBentMyWookie on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

IBentMyWookie — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:57:59 +0000

and zOMG get your shortest friend to dress up as Sally and glare at you all night.

Choire Sicha on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Choire Sicha — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:55:00 +0000

OH MY GOD, you too?? It is nuts. It has been three weeks of birthdays. It is making me hallucinate.

cherrispryte on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

cherrispryte — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:54:13 +0000

#gradschoolmidterms, #partyfullofstrangers, #findingafuckingnewjobcausethisoneskillingme

IBentMyWookie on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

IBentMyWookie — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:54:00 +0000

Fancy Betty or Housework Betty?

sox on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

sox — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:49:59 +0000

#bringbackThePoundSign

HiredGoons on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HiredGoons — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:44:00 +0000

Wow, the 'Blind Melon' chick really blossomed. Good for her!

mathnet on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

mathnet — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:41:41 +0000

I really miss calling it The Pound Sign. :(

Maevemealone on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Maevemealone — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:38:34 +0000

#drinking, #making betty draper costume!

roithamer on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

roithamer — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:36:45 +0000

Just read this week's Peter Hessler instead - easy yet totally deep.

Choire Sicha on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Choire Sicha — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:35:49 +0000

She's actually one above a columnist. She's a paladin!

Rod T on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Rod T — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:21:09 +0000

The only hash I care about? http://www.420magazine.com/forums/how-videos/69892-how-smoke-hash.html Can I ask a question, without answering the overlord's? WHAT IS UP WITH ALL THE BIRTHDAY PARTIES?

David Cho on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

David Cho — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:18:52 +0000

#HA!

sox on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

sox — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:15:50 +0000

HK Choi is not a columnist?

HiredGoons on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HiredGoons — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:08:04 +0000

(I know you're all jealoussssss).

brent_cox on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

brent_cox — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:05:16 +0000

I finally got to the New Yorker article last week and recommend it, unless you want to have a nice weekend.

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:03:33 +0000

Troll leaves a link to a video about slapping gay children (avec music) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-zsxQIL8oik

Bucko on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Bucko — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 17:00:19 +0000

Troll says, what?

HiredGoons on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

HiredGoons — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:59:52 +0000

#Grandmother's birthday in New Jersey

Maevemealone on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Maevemealone — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:52:52 +0000

#UNTZUNTZUNTZUNTZ

Choire Sicha on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Choire Sicha — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:51:07 +0000

HA!

NicFit on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

NicFit — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:50:41 +0000

sorry: #sex, #drugs, #poundinghousemusic

NicFit on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

NicFit — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:49:57 +0000

Dude, weekend = sex, drugs and pounding house music.

Tuna Surprise on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

Tuna Surprise — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:49:20 +0000

I plan to spend all weekend adding comments to this post in hopes of becoming The Awl evening/weekend editor. #openmicnights, #openbeerbottlenights, #slavelabor, #sad

fek on Top Five Questions About This Weekend

fek — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 16:46:04 +0000

#whatevs