Small Campus Paper Causes Huge Offense
Hmm, sounds like one Seattle resident is very angry at the one-page satirical college newspaper Pamphlette, which is very slow to update online. Pamphlette is based out of Reed (that's the west coast school that's not as stoney and hilarious as Evergreen nor as outdoorsey and earnest as Whitman but instead is sort of anxious and competitive and goth) and contains articles such as "Establishing Consent," a guide to consensual sex (handy!), and a lot about how awful the Renn Fayre is. Yes. Here is the Flickr pool for the college paper. The real college paper. Somewhere in there are pictures of their Renn Fayre. Just sayin'! ANYWAY. So what else did this outraged alleged parent say? Okay, I'm warning you….
That Flickr pool did more to wake me up this morning than my cup of coffee. Jeesus, I think I'm breaking out in hives now…
Good gawd. On the one hand I want to slap them and tell them to wake the fuck up and on the other hand I want to shield them so they never see anything real. But mostly I just had to click away.
It took some real gumption to get out of that Flickr black hole.
That amount of 'shrooms you're going to see a lot of things that aren't real.
To take issue with your taxonomy of crunchy NW schools, Whitman is not anywhere near the same orbit as Reed and Evergreen in terms of stoney flakiness. For starters, it is located in Walla Walla, Washington, which should tell you more than you need to know.
Well, the northwest schools draw largely from the same regional population actually. They have not dissimilar population distribution ratios. And while Whitman is the one sequestered in delightful W-squared, for those of us on the east coast, it might as well be Portland. Heh. (Though I personally prefer Walla Walla, where everyone is bright (and yes, largely white) and outdoorsey and shiny.) Plus the debate team is so good!
And by those demos I mean the students, not the town. See also our previous coverage of Walla Walla's taco trucks.
The hippies from my east coast school who were smart went to Reed. The ones who were just stoned went to Lewis and Clark.
Indeed! Reed and Evergreen draw dirty hippies from all over. Despite its taco trucks (very much a function of local demographics), Whitman's draw is primarily regional. Lewis and Clark is a much better point of comparison.
Maybe Joe's grandparents are still on T-Mobile.
This just in: being a hippie is trite.
And being a rich faux-hippie is, well, kind of sad.
bittersweet?
Touche. I was thinking more on the pathetic side of sad, really.
Is there such a thing as a poor, real hippie? Aren't hippies sort of faux by design?
Irregardless (heh) I think at this point everything is sort of 'faux.'
I've always thought of Reed as the Biggie to Wesleyan's Tupac.
Surely, it would be the other way around.
Oprah really needs to rein him in.
"What's next? Hooded students on campus?"
Um, pretty sure a lot of them already wear hoodies.
Is it anti-Semitic to spell it "Anti-Semetic?" Or just semi-literate?
I've long been fascinated by how this particular misspelling has become so prevalent.
It is pronounced "Whiteman." Also, Reed is where emos go to nurture unrequited crushes and kill themselves.
A prospective student once speculated that Reed students all exist on a continuum between hippie and hipster, and I still haven't been able to think of something that proves her wrong.
I was thinking "poor kids, so unprepared for life and the coming depression" blah blah and then I thought "Fuck it, I'm gonna need me some slaves, YOU'LL DO MY PRETTIES".
While the culture of any campus can't be understood statistically, here are the real numbers for Whitman College:
Academic Profile for the entering class:
•Medians: 3.84 HS GPA
680 SAT Critical Reading
660 SAT Math
660 SAT Writing
1340 Total SAT (CR+M)
31 ACT (SAT equiv = 1380)
Number of Valedictorians for the entering class > 1 in 10; Total ethnic diversity = 20.1%; Minimum percent of students for whom neither parent attended college: 13.5%; Graduate rate (within 5 years) is greater than 90%. Percent receiving financial aid: the majority
We are, unfortunately, no longer in the Princeton Review top ten for "Happiest Students."
Ahhhh. Misty water-color memories of the way we never were. Reed was definitely the best debt I've incurred, but those trust fund social register kids dumpster diving in solidarity with the poor always worked my last nerve. The smellier the co-ed, the richer the parents. As a local scholarship kid I was aware of the class issues that passed over more than a few heads, but I fondly remember: Sunny Day Kegs, Bill Bennet on the cover of the Times brandishing our student handbook, the Flagellants parade, the Golf Ball roll. Good times.
The drugs at Renn Fayre were pretty awesome, but are also probably the reason I can't concentrate so well anymore.
This is my newspaper! I founded the Pamphlette! I'm so happy it's stayed true to that blend of quality humor writing and blatant anti-semitism for which it was known during my editorial reign.