Oh, That's So Cute, An Ice-Skating Bea… AAAGHHH!!! NO, NO!!! PLEASE GOD, HELP ME!!!

You know what bears don’t like so much? Wearing ice-skates. As the BBC reports, an ice-skating bear killed the manager of a touring Russian circus while they practiced for a show in Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan. “The bear, WHO HAD ON SKATES AT THE TIME, severely mauled another circus worker who tried to rescue the manager.” Apparently, bears in Russia play hockey, too. That seems like a good idea. Let’s give these killing machines big sticks to go along with their razor-sharp claws and teeth.