David Cho: what are you going to be for halloween
BALK: Slutty H1N1 vaccine
David Cho: you can do better than that
David Cho: (as far as jokes go)
David Cho: let's try this again
David Cho: what are you going to be for halloween?
BALK: Slutty “Federal Pay Czar” Kenneth Feinberg
David Cho: Eh
BALK: Slutty Andre Agassi meth dealer?
BALK: Slutty NBC affiliate concerned by poor ratings for new 10 P.M. Leno show?
BALK: Slutty death row kitty?
David Cho is offline (3:14:22)
BALK: Everyone’s a critic.
Friday, October 30, 2009
Published at 3:15 pm, Friday, Oct 30, 2009
102 Responses
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Slutty Henry Louis Gates, Jr.
10/30/09 ReplySo, Cornell West.
10/30/09 Reply*Cornel* and I don’t like the implication, sir!
10/30/09 ReplyHeh. Whoops.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty shark with lasers.
10/30/09 Reply…eating a bear.
10/30/09 Replyslutty cheeto-eating bear. convince a friend to go as slutty minivan
10/30/09 ReplyWhy not turn the clock back early so you can spend an extra hour with us here today, running it out!
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Benson The Carp
10/30/09 ReplyAww. You just made me sad
10/30/09 ReplyBenson lives on, within our inner-slut
10/30/09 ReplyHe was in Harper’s Index this past issue, which made me giggle.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Kate Gosselin haircut.
10/30/09 ReplySLUTTY CHELSEA HANDLERS REAL BOOBS
10/30/09 ReplyI love you so hard, mathie.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Crooked Dolphin
IT WILL NEVER NOT MAKE ME LOL
10/30/09 ReplyI believe I sent you a .jpg of your Halloween costume yesterday, Balk.
10/30/09 Replyhttp://www.icantbelievetheydidthat.com/Miscellaneous/bear-shark-octopus.jpg
10/30/09 Reply(Vinnie Barbarino)
10/30/09 ReplyBut not slutty.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty promiscuous person.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Mackenzie Phillips.
10/30/09 ReplyOh!
10/30/09 ReplySlutty credit default swap.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Summer of Death (i.e., I’m here to kill you but let’s fool around for a few minutes first).
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Lady GaGa aka Lady GaGa.
10/30/09 ReplyI’ve been making this damn joke for nigh on three decades but damn it, I SWEAR this is the year I’m making Slutty Balk happen.
10/30/09 Replywhere will you source the fur?
10/30/09 ReplyFrom Balk’s back?
10/30/09 ReplySlutty awl gif.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty alt text. Slutty hidden headline, RIP.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty public option.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Julia Allison.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Super Shrimp.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty garden statuary.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Filthy ApartOffice Desk.
10/30/09 ReplyZombie in over-the-knee boots.
10/30/09 ReplyShouldn’t you be dressing as a Chippendale’s dude(ette)?
Y’Awl should [sic].
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Catpill.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty change-bowl.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Single Digit Commenter Number.
10/30/09 ReplyWell, you have already cornered the market on slutty avatars so you might as well.
10/30/09 ReplySLUTTY AVATAR HOW DID I NOT THINK OF THAT?
10/30/09 ReplyIf I had enough time to get a boob job before tomorrow I would go as your avatar.
10/30/09 Reply(I was kind of hoping Balk would get a set of costume boobs, strap a bottle of Knob Creek on ‘em and go as His Own Biggest Fan.) (Alex? Maybe think about it?)
10/30/09 ReplyYou could buy this shirt:
http://www.costumekingdom.com/p-10631-adult-costumes-hairy-shirt.aspx
Get a glass of bourbon, and strap a fake hand in front of your face and go as Balk’s avatar. Then the circle would be complete.
10/30/09 ReplyCantelopes?
10/30/09 ReplySLUTTY MYSTERY COMMENTER #1
10/30/09 Reply(*shakes fist* Cat! You just know that bastard got #1.)
10/30/09 ReplyOooh, our next contest should be guess who is #1?
Nick Denton, the Cat, Maer Roshan, Balk’s mom?
10/30/09 ReplyNope, not me. My Alex “forgot” to send his own mother one of the advance invites, can you believe?
10/30/09 ReplyAwesome.
Balk’s Mom’s presence necessitates asterisks: Mystery Commenter #1 is so B***’* ****.
10/30/09 ReplyI’m actually taking part in a group costume this year entirely made up of inappropriately slutty costumes, mainly involving historocal figures. Slutty Gandhi. Slutty Florence Nightingale. Slutty Lincoln (crop top suit!), Slutty Pope Bonaface IV, etc. Me? Oh, I’m Slutty Anne Frank.
10/30/09 ReplyToo soon.
10/30/09 ReplyWAY TOO LATE.
10/30/09 ReplyYou want ‘too soon’?:
Slutty Neda
forgivemeforgivemeforgiveme
10/30/09 ReplyHello My Name Is “Anne Skank.”
Apologies, it was a 2.5 drink epiphany.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Daylight Savings Time
10/30/09 ReplyHelen Skellertor?
10/30/09 ReplyGreta van Sustren.
10/30/09 Replyslutty.
10/30/09 ReplyI wish the Awl would pay more attention to the effects of the fall of Communism on Hungary and Poland. This is juvenile.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Perestroika..
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Gulag
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Hope for a Return to Stalinism
10/30/09 ReplyShut up that post made me SO HAPPY.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Jon Corzine. I’ll get all the ladies by simply not being as fat as the guy right behind me.
10/30/09 ReplyBased on this purple facepaint thing around my eye, I think I”m going as Slutty Domestic Abuse.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty General Sherman marching through Georgia.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Ghengis Khan.
10/30/09 ReplyZombie Zooey Deschanel. OH WAIT.
10/30/09 ReplyYou’d have to make her livlier and less ‘dead-eyed.’
10/30/09 ReplyIt would be a REVERSE ZOMBIE.
10/30/09 ReplyThe Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zooey Deschanel.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Blogger
10/30/09 ReplySlutty bear-mangled non-testicled Joe Lieberman.
10/30/09 ReplyI will go as this, if you will go as Slutty AC.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Balk of Palm Beach
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Giant Animatronic Monster Shrimp!!
10/30/09 ReplyDoes slatternly count?
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Bear, the most popular of the Care Bears3.
10/30/09 ReplyMaybe with a phallus on his tummy? Or a screen with porn on it?
(Sluty typos!)
10/30/09 ReplySo, slutty Teletubby?
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Sully.
10/30/09 ReplyDoes not compute…
10/30/09 ReplySullenberger.
Plane. Hudson.
10/30/09 ReplyI know. Of all the people mentioned so far, he’s the one I have trouble picturing as slutty. But I’m a sucker for heroes.
11/1/09 ReplyGo as Berlusconi. YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO. As a bonus, it’s automatically slutty.
10/30/09 Replybut where would one get so many Italian whores at such a late hour?
10/30/09 ReplyFrom the Ukraine
10/30/09 ReplyWhere does ‘Real Housewives of New Jersey’ get theirs?
10/30/09 ReplySlutty prostitution whore.
10/30/09 ReplyJack the Ripper victim.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty pizza bagel.
10/30/09 ReplyHow could we forget?
Slutty Short-Nosed Fruit Bat (may be redundant)
Actually, I like slutty Berlusconi better, but only if you can get a slutty Michelle Obama to go with you.
10/30/09 ReplyPageview slut?
10/30/09 ReplyI just decided on Slutty Beth Ditto. Forealz.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Willem Dafoe’s Birchbarked Peenie.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Fat JC Penney Mannequin.
10/30/09 ReplySlutty Samantha Geimer
10/31/09 ReplySlutty Nobel Peace Prize.
10/31/09 ReplySlutty Butterfinger! (”Slutterfinger” to my friends.)
10/31/09 Reply