Friday, October 30th, 2009
34

God Damn, This Big Ass Luxury Cruise Boat Is So God Damn Big

JESUS FUCK LOOK AT THAT FUCKING BOAT
The Oasis of the Seas, the largest cruise liner ever built, has left port for Miami, from where it will begin taking more than 6,000 passengers at time (!!!) on Royal Caribbean tours in December. It cost $1.5 billion to build and is 1,200 feet long-one-and-a-half times the size of the Queen Mary II. Man, just think of all the despair and communicable disease that thing's going to pack in.

34 Comments / Post A Comment

Abe Sauer (#148)

It goes without saying, that essay is awesome, but, in retrospect, the despair was a carry-on.

Flashman (#418)

Maybe that's where it started.

Flashman (#418)

It looks a bit top-heavy to me. I hope they've taken the weight of their passengers into account.

Baboleen (#1,430)

It looks like a floating highrise from Mumbai.

Mindpowered (#948)

"Floating Supermax" was my Co-workers comment.

cherrispryte (#444)

Hey, boat?
Hi. Please hit an iceberg. It'd make my day.
Thanks!

HiredGoons (#603)

That is a fuck-ton of pillow mints.

zidaane (#373)

It would be hard to resist not raping and pillaging a whole port town when you outnumber it like 6 – 1.

Flashman (#418)

The Somalis are going to be wanting one heck of a ransom for this one.

johnpseudonym (#1,452)

I fear Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet will require too much money to be in this picture.

brent_cox (#40)

An excellent tourist aggregation/removal scheme: go Giant Fucking Boat!

josh_speed (#97)

Have we learned nothing from [engineering hubris] + [cultural imperialism] + [vast organized 'fun'] – [one really dumbass thing that could take this whole mofo down]?

Bittersweet (#765)

Apparently not. Cue hurricane/iceberg/giant whirlpool/tropical country revolution/Bermuda Triangle.

HiredGoons (#603)

I've seen bigger Trump wedding cakes.

RocketSurgeon (#1,632)

But how many adult contemporary piano lounges and bad art auctions does it have?

RocketSurgeon (#1,632)

Also, seeing a boat like this kind of makes me wish the world was flat and easy to sail off of.

hman (#53)

Shuffleshuffleshuffleboard.

Baboleen (#1,430)

Not enough lifeboats!!

HiredGoons (#603)

God willing.

Baboleen (#1,430)

Hah

WindowSeat (#180)

Re-Christen it the "Norovirus" and be done with it

Bittersweet (#765)

Not enough bathrooms!!

HiredGoons (#603)

God willing…

elecampane (#1,877)

He says he's got a big boat, but it's just a ferryboat, and that makes for a short, short ride.

Bucko (#1,599)
josh_speed (#97)

Or the Phloston Paradise from The Fifth Element…

If Ruby Rhod is on that boat, I'm booking right now.

Pop Socket (#187)

I now have a Maureen McGovern earworm stuck in my head.
"There's got to be a morning after…"

But there wasn't! That's what made it funny.

That is one giant pile of Legionnaire's Disease.

notaboat (#2,104)

Dear Dipshi$ Seppo's
take the time to look up the difference between a boat and a ship. It's like calling a blog a sprog…

It also has the world's larges shuffleboard court … the size of six football fields!

iplaudius (#1,066)

It's too big to fail.

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