New Jersey Republican gubernatorial hopeful Chris Christie's schedule today:
1 p.m. Christie drops by Franklin Steakhouse and Tavern, Franklin Steakhouse and Tavern, 522 Franklin Avenue, Nutley.
2 p.m. Chris Christie stops by the Garfield AARP Senior Pizza Party, Frank B. Calandriello Senior Center, 480 Midland Avenue, Garfield.
Dude, those double lunches are NOT GONNA HELP.
3 p.m. Ice Cream Social, East Brunswick Knights of Columbus.
4 p.m. McDonalds, Snack Wrap break!
5 p.m. Cheeseburgers at Silver Coin Diner in Hammonton.
6 p.m. Lobster House, Cape May.
7 p.m. Quadruple bypass and lap-band procedure at Robert Wood Johnson University Hospital, Hamilton.
Surprised Garfield's not serving lasagna.
I do not see the baconnaise shooters on that list.