The Awl

etsryan on Public Apology: Dear G-d

etsryan — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 01:24:28 +0000

guilty as charged. i think. therefore...? so am i humbly admitting my fault of imperfect understanding or arrogantly proclaiming my intellectual prowess? Both? d'oh! Feeling stupid? (where's the comment thread about that again?) would some scotch help? or French champagne? (someone (a chef with a new restaurant around here in the hinterlands) gave me a bottle for returning his (girlfriend's?) missing purse that was laying in the road the other night) thankyouverymuchyoulookmaaavelous! cheers (ev ree body nose ur name) Risen Lord Jesus' Peace! e.t./sue > *:D (: +

etsryan on Public Apology: Dear G-d

etsryan — Thu, 01 Oct 2009 01:15:05 +0000

tee hee lol touche nice zinger 'sweet' Risen Lord Jesus' Peace! e.t./sue > *:D (: +

theDRA on Public Apology: Dear G-d

theDRA — Wed, 30 Sep 2009 11:58:51 +0000

badass

roberta on Public Apology: Dear G-d

roberta — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 17:18:49 +0000

Brilliant Dave. Love your column.

numbersix on Public Apology: Dear G-d

numbersix — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 10:53:34 +0000

It's both, but Bry's answer was better.

Abe Sauer on Public Apology: Dear G-d

Abe Sauer — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 21:07:25 +0000

Not that I don't like it Dave! You know... there's the one big joke... or a bunch of smaller ones....

Dave Bry on Public Apology: Dear G-d

Dave Bry — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 17:30:28 +0000

"Sim simmah/Who got the keys to my bimah?"

raging on Public Apology: Dear G-d

raging — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 17:12:24 +0000

I thought "beemer" was the proper spelling. It always made sense to stand on your BMW at your bar mitzvah.

TerseNursePornstein on Public Apology: Dear G-d

TerseNursePornstein — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 15:42:40 +0000

(voice of HAL) "Is your conclusion trimmed, Dave?"

hman on Public Apology: Dear G-d

hman — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 15:09:00 +0000

I thought "brei" was the proper spelling. Still, I enjoyed this.

Dave Bry on Public Apology: Dear G-d

Dave Bry — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 14:54:48 +0000

That is a good question, Mathnet. And I'm not really a good person to answer it. (I learned today was Yom Kipur... yesterday.) But I would say either or both. And I'd guess that there is a long argument about it in the Talmud. Which, to my understanding, is like a long form version of the Awl's comments section.

Dave Bry on Public Apology: Dear G-d

Dave Bry — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 14:49:13 +0000

Yes. That would have been good. Would have made for a funny edit if Choire had thought of it, though: "Trimmed the conclusion a bit..."

HiredGoons on Public Apology: Dear G-d

HiredGoons — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 14:46:06 +0000

<-concurs.

Baboleen on Public Apology: Dear G-d

Baboleen — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 14:39:31 +0000

Monsters of Folk's Dear God (Sincerely M.O.F.) is ringing in my ears..

MisterHippity on Public Apology: Dear G-d

MisterHippity — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 13:54:35 +0000

Now that song is running through my head.

MisterHippity on Public Apology: Dear G-d

MisterHippity — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 13:46:09 +0000

Did You make disease and the diamond blue? Did You make mankind, after we made you? (XTC)

TableNine on Public Apology: Dear G-d

TableNine — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 13:44:16 +0000

Baboleen on Public Apology: Dear G-d

Baboleen — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 13:11:28 +0000

God- "Here is another one of those humans too smart to get it."

mathnet on Public Apology: Dear G-d

mathnet — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 13:09:05 +0000

Dave Bry was born a Jew! Yom Kippur question from a shiksa: When you (people) atone, does it mean that you confess/apologize to the people you've wronged during the year, or does it mean that you confess/apologize to God?

TerseNursePornstein on Public Apology: Dear G-d

TerseNursePornstein — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:55:00 +0000

The guilt, the self-deprecating humor, the perseveration, the lightweight drinking, your taste in music... it all makes sense to me now!

jfruh on Public Apology: Dear G-d

jfruh — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:53:24 +0000

Question for those of you who are better Jews than me: when you take Hebrew school for the purpose of being Mitzvah'd, do you (or are you supposed to, unlike Mr. Bry) actually learn to read Hebrew, in the sense that you know what the individual words actually mean and have some rudiments of how the grammar work? Or are you just learning how to pronounce Hebrew, so that you can look at the letters on the page and speak the sacred words aloud, even if you only know what they mean because someone's provided you with a translation? Also, in Israel, where everyone already knows how to read and speak Hebrew, are Ba(r/t) Mitzvahs extremely not big deals?

abbyjaye on Public Apology: Dear G-d

abbyjaye — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:50:40 +0000

Check plus, Mr. Bry. I am fasting today so I can tell my parents I did, to avoid further breaking the ninth commandment.

HiredGoons on Public Apology: Dear G-d

HiredGoons — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:49:11 +0000

Here's to washing away your sins with booze. *clink

lululemming on Public Apology: Dear G-d

lululemming — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:34:54 +0000

IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ll never forget a bit of graffiti I saw shortly after 9/11:..........

toadvine on Public Apology: Dear G-d

toadvine — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:21:45 +0000

I enjoy these "Public Apology" columns so much. Thank you.

CaptainFantastic on Public Apology: Dear G-d

CaptainFantastic — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:20:17 +0000

Was the desk lamp, that ends with you at college, in your room illuminating the Torah and The Joy of Sex? I'll assume so.

NicFit on Public Apology: Dear G-d

NicFit — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:20:01 +0000

I'll never forget a bit of graffiti I saw shortly after 9/11: "God protect me from those who believe in you."

oudemia on Public Apology: Dear G-d

oudemia — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:16:55 +0000

Me too!

Abe Sauer on Public Apology: Dear G-d

Abe Sauer — Mon, 28 Sep 2009 12:14:48 +0000

Aw. i was kinda hoping there wouldn't be anything after the "READ MORE."