Seriously.Astro Boy! Is anyone actually going to watch this? Me and a bajillion fandorks saw the extended clip at SD ComicCon and it was so that baroque-ass expensive meh where you HAAAAAATE it for existing (until they hire you, tralalala). Hollywood keeps comparing it to that crackish Wachowski shitshow Speed Racer, crunching numbers and talking about the "hella big fanbase" (their words) but still haven't seemed to isolate the real problem behind the source material. It's not that anime adaptations won't work, it's that nobody, beyond metal-lunchbox striped-tights types, gives a shit about this franchise domestically (aaaaand the message boards EXPLODE).
Yeah, I said it. NOBDOY CARES. You can't just throw a bunch of fancy zeros and ones (or whatever) at the problem and fatten it with star power and hope everything will work out.
He's called the "Mickey Mouse of Japan" but so what? He's essentially a glyph. Atom IS AN EMOTICON. The smiley face one with the bootleg wayfarers. And you know the producers want Shrek money so the narrative appears to be an unholy snoozefest of sentient robot heroism compared to Osamu Tezuka's poignant Pinocchio/Edward Scissorhandsish OG themes of alienation. Also, he's wearing pants.
Sadface.
The cast includes Eugene Levy (who needs to do something really good really soon), Charlize Theron (who merits zero scene cred because Aeon Flux was garbage and she played the worst superhero next to Uma in My Super Ex-Girlfriend for Hancock), Nic Cage, and Kristen Bell who we must hold an intervention for BECAUSE SHE IS STILL DATING DAX SHEPARD.
What she said.
Christ, Eugene Levy. You're right. His wrist has to be limp from cashing those American Pie sequel checks (AP: Book of Love coming this year!). and a look at his last three years is grim.
Don't forget about Gooby!
And New York Minute! God.
Don't be trashing on New York Minute.
Mary you had me until Cage. No one can stink up a movie faster the that dog faced scenery glutton.
Knowing? GENIUS. Other than his pansy kid being a vegetarian. Also, um i spelled NOBODY wrong. AHAHHAHA. Also, HE MARRIED A KOREAN WAITRESS and named his kid after a DC hero. Loves him. He's such a carnie.
THE CAVES CANNOT SAVE US!!!
Cage, however, can.
FYI: "baroque-ass expensive meh"
*stealing it*
GIIIIIRRRRRRRRRRRRL *shoulder swat*
Congratulations!!!!!
Exactly my reaction to GIJOe. Including all the Eugene Levy.
If I were the marryin' sort, I'd pick you to do mah marryin' with, because I imagine you serve up dishes of this sorta crazy all day long.