My Snoring Is Going To Kill Me?
I don't know if it's my advancing years or my expanding waistline, but stories like this one are starting to scare the crap out of me.
Severe nightly episodes of interrupted breathing during sleep – commonly known as sleep apnea – double the risk of death for middle-age men, according to a new study being called the largest ever conducted on the disorder.Even men with moderate sleep apnea – anywhere from 15 to 30 instances of oxygen deprivation per hour – appear to be 45 percent more likely to die from any cause than those who have no nighttime breathing problems.
I for sure have sleep apnea—I literally lurch forward several times a night gasping for air or choking on drool—but as my typical procedure on health related matters is the time-tested method of ignoring it and hoping it will self-correct, this is more than a little alarming. On the other hand, "It's a chronic exposure… One night's exposure in itself is not a health risk. … It happens hundreds of times a night and it goes on for decades." Decades? I can probably handle that!
[The future(?)] Mrs. Balk is a lucky, lucky woman.
My boyfriend has sleep apnea (and is taking what we shall call "the Balk approach" to dealing with it) and sleeping next to him is SCARY sometimes. Sometimes I count how many seconds he goes for without breathing, and wake him if it hits 30. I don't sleep much.
Maybe The ZEO PERSONAL SLEEP COACH could help.
I'd like to learn more….where can I go to do that?
Sigh. What can I say at this point?
Here's the upside. You can get through airport security kinda easier with a CPAP machine! Also it makes soothing white noise.
Also you're a jackass.
A CPAP machine is a godsend. A cumbersome one, but a godsend nonetheless.
My CPAP machine is a hummer n' a fifth of Dewar's.
Do you ever stick him with Cat's vitamin B12 syringe, just for shits and giggles?
"Soothing" white noise? Maybe, if you're
a) the one using it — thus, presumably asleep — and not the one trying to sleep beside it; or
b) someone who enjoys the noise emanating from a vacuum cleaner.
(Sorry, I get cranky when I'm tired.)
How much worse is the situation if you snore while you're awake?
Mr. Hagen's snoring will kill me. Maybe I will just be paralyzed from sleeping on the couch.
Your snoring is only going to kill you if the person "sleeping" next to you doesn't kill you first.
"Even men with moderate sleep apnea – anywhere from 15 to 30 instances of oxygen deprivation per hour – appear to be 45 percent more likely to die from any cause than those who have no nighttime breathing problems."
I call bullshit. We're all equally likely to die.
STRONGLY AGREE
My 85-year-old uncle has had it all his life. And I think it's more likely his chronic addiction to Fox News will kill him first.
Foam pillow. Applied topically, for several moments: total cure.
You can just take singing lessons, apparently! I would love if you would do this, and then tell us all about it.
http://www.singingforsnorers.com/
(I found it for my cousin, but he won't try it either.)