The Summer of Death is a heartless season. On Saturday, staff at the Miami tourist attraction Jungle Island found the two-ton, 20-foot-long, crocodile known as Hank the Crocosaurus dead at the bottom of his pool. As reported in the Miami Herald, Hank died a bachelor; his only companion was a five-pound turtle named Frank.
The Herald's Robert Samuels:
The son of an Asian crocodile and a saltwater crocodile, the Thailand native's girth left him isolated for most of his life. He had no mating partners, no friends. It wasn't clear whether other animals were scared of him for being too massive-or if he shunned them for being too small.
Three years ago, however, Frank mysteriously appeared in Hank's enclosed habitat. No one knows how he got in, but the fearless turtle soon took to riding atop the Hank's massive snout, cleaning up the algae that collected between the gnarly scales there. "People used to be scared [Hank] would eat the turtle,'' said Jungle Island spokesperson Brigette Grosjean. "But he never did.''
Do you think Belle was a bestialist, and secretly disappointed when The Beast turned back into a Prince?
She was a furry lifestyler who couldn't overcome her obsession. I remember Belle back in the 80's when she would show up to the Nuevo Laredo Six Flags and do the Eeyore show.
heh, Donkey Punch.
God, she was so coked out back then. We were all really worried.
I remember when that Six Flags hired me to dress in a Barney suit and I debuted "Cockasuarus" to a rowdy group of locals.
BTW - at least a six piece luggage set, that thar.
Or two hundred pimps could now proudly stroll their respective Avenues or Boulevards checkin' in on they bitches.
what would that be? a flock? a gaggle?
This is just like how Choire mysteriously appeared in Balk's habitat, cleaning up the algae that collected between the gnarly scales there.
"People used to be scared Balk would eat Choire," said The Awl spokesperson David Cho. "But he never did."
There's gotta be a market for Awl's Fables.
What no "isolated for his girth" jokes?
Crocosaurus understood that he had plenty of easy meals coming his way, so his life was optimized by allowing the turtle to take care of the algae. Eating the turtle would have left him needlessly burdened by the algae.