Dreamworks is in negotiations for the rights to "View-Master, the Fisher-Price toy with little 3-D picture discs of mountains, rivers and caverns that kids could rotate through a viewfinder." The movie is expected to be a multi-generational saga following the life of a family of Cuban exiles who leave Havana with Fulgencio Batista's entourage on the eve of Castro's revolution and struggle to adapt to their new lives in Miami. Andy Garcia is slated to play clan patriarch Juan Belisario Miramaestro, and Ellen Page is attached as Clarita, his strong-willed granddaughter. Kidding! It's actually gonna be a Goonies rip-off.
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
7
Suck it Dreamworks, I've already got Cory Doctorow working on Stereopticon a Steampunk flavored adventure based on the Victorian progenitor of the Viewmaster.
Starring the entire audio-animatronic cast of 'It's A Small World After All' at Disney Anaheim, Ca., a family of ring-tailed lemurs, and some things that look really bulbous and trippy in pseudo 3d View-Master [tm] technology, but I can't remember what the jeebus they were.
Other upcoming movies:
Lincoln Logs
Barnyard See and Say
and Erector Set for the NC-17 crowd.
Tinker Toys: The Reckoning
My Pretty Pony: Who's Pretty Now?
View-Master missed the big idea when it neglected porn.
Another big fuck you from Dreamworks to all the people who lack binocular depth cues.