Understanding Bravo's "Millionaire Matchmaker"
"A Millionaire Matchmaker 'mixer' will look familiar to anyone who has seen Cathouse, the HBO reality show about a legal Nevada brothel. A recurring Cathouse motif-it's featured in the show's intro-is the "lineup," when new clients enter the Bunny Ranch and all available prostitutes come rushing from their rooms so that the potential buyer can inspect the merchandise. 'Girls, come and meet my millionaires,' Patti cries, and whatever cavernous LA-cheesy venue she's selected becomes an ad hoc brothel."
Jesus, the lip gloss bit is devastating. Brava!
Oh, almost forgot, double Brava for avoiding the use of "tranny" when describing Patti. Emily rawks.
Also? yenta.
Pati doesn't beat around the bush, she gets right in your bush.
It's a "Master Date," Emily. (Otherwise, yes.)
Never having seen/heard of this hideous-sounding show, I immediately went to their website; you can watch videos from it, and, snickering, I tried to see her 'advice' for homosexuals, entitled 'For the Gays'. But, Oh no!, possibly because I'm in Canada, or maybe because I'm a heathen, it wouldn't let me and instead it shut down my browser!
But, how will I know what to do when I meet a desperate rich dude??
It's not advice. It's how to join. Do you have $55K USD?
http://millionairematchmaker.tv/content/file_gay/dir_language/
Welcome to the Gay Division of the Millionaire's Club!
We have male and female members all around the world!
GAY MEMBERSHIP Advantages and Fees*:
� $55,000 US dollars for a year of unlimited dating nationally throughout the US/Canada
� 1 hour date coaching session with the dating coach in your area
� 1 hour relationship counseling session with the relationship counselor in your area
� 1 hour image consulting session with the image consultant in your area
� 1 hour hypnotherapy session with the hypnotherapist in your area
� 2 month freeze (you can put your membership on hold up to 2 months if you meet a match through us or outside the service)
*There may be an additional fee for local/national advertising or Senior Staff member 'add-ons'.
AMAZING
Who's going to make the Team Emily's Grandmother shirts on Cafepress?
Chyna?
Lord, that photo. I knew it was a mistake for Iggy Pop to say "yes" when Gene Simmons asked him out.
Does she come with a paper bag?
BTW, and I hate to undercut my own comment, but it deserves it: the article was brilliant, Emily.
Very nice. It made me want to "embrace life".